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ZenThePunker
[–]fengpi 160 points161 points162 points 9 years ago* (33 children) | Copy Link
These Cosmo-style "Is He A Real Man™?" articles are just wish-fulfillment lists.
Yes, he works a high-powered job, he is family-oriented and he can whisk you off to Spain on a whim. There's totally 72 hours in every day and if he lacks unlimited money and energy, he isn't a Real Man™.
He's built with a 6-pack but not overly muscular, he knows how to dress but not better than you, he has good taste in accessories but isn't ostentatious, he remembers your birthday but never your age, he's gentle but can slit his enemies' throats, he's brilliant but not a know-it-all, he's got a big dick but not too big a dick, he's into sports but not obsessed with sports, his money isn't important but it's vital that he spends it on you, he's got a great sense of humor but only you can understand his jokes, he's [insert your random fantasy unicorn here] but not too much [random fantasy unicorn]...
Meanwhile, what does Suzie Cosmoreader bring to the table that makes her worthy of this Real Man™ of whom there are so embarrassingly few in this world full of sub-human schmoes? Unimportant.
[–]number4ty7 36 points37 points38 points 9 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
They want the mgtows. All in the gym, doing their own ironing, keeping busy and learning to dress well. Such a parody.
[–]ovrsurge 6 points7 points8 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I think you are idealising mgtow a bit too much.
Not to say mgtow isn't the most viable philosophy for men right now, but honestly a majority of men only work out or produce fucktonnes of wealth in order to get women.
This is the true anti-civilization horror that mgtow represents to the gynocracy. Men ignoring women and only producing enough wealth for their own survival.
This is why going off-grid is next to illegal and why there are no sanctuary cities for your wallet.
[–]SeeEmmDee -1 points0 points1 point 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think you are idealising mgtow a bit too much
Mgtows tend to do that.
[–]Saturn23M31 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I understand and get the idea behind them. Pretty valid until you go too far down the rabbit hole but you are kidding yourself if you think any decent chunk mgtows have dedicated themselves to become Adonis.
[–]Lucius_Martius 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
All in the gym, doing their own ironing, keeping busy and learning to dress well.
I am a MGTOW. But I don't give a shit about going to the gym or about how I dress (as long as it's durable and practical). I rather enjoy my life than putting enormous effort into the same things people normally only do to impress women.
Maybe you confuse MGTOW with PUA?
[–]the_unseen_one 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Well, the only way a man has time for that shit is if he is single or has a remarkably undemanding wife (read: almost never) so it figures.
[–]Rasalom72 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That's the point... if she's not undemanding, she shouldn't be your wife.
[+]KingRobotPrince points 9 years ago* [recovered] (15 children) | Copy Link
what does Suzie Cosmoreader bring to the table that makes her worthy of this Real Man™
Apparently she has a vagina. This is all she needs to contribute.
[–][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points 9 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
It seems to be working for them in the current social paradigm because most guys are too thirsty for any real change to ever occur. Pussy is a carefully controlled commodity.
[–]KingRobotPrince 13 points14 points15 points 9 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
I wonder if men are perhaps also being conditioned to allow women to treat them badly, and be afraid to break up with them because it makes them a bad person.
So hooked in by sex and initial niceness. Then, once the full extent of the horrific personality is revealed, men are trapped because breaking up with a women is being massaged into being a bad thing to do.
No evidence, just an idea. But it seems often that women wanting to leave men because they are poor seems totally fine. E.g. "he has no ambition" "he doesn't take his career seriously". Whereas breaking up with a girl because she is horrible or got fat is the work of the devil. It seems like men are pressured to stick by women in far worse situations than women are free to leave men in.
Like a woman "dumping a loser" is empowering, and a man "dumping a fatty" is awful.
[–]jmg83 6 points7 points8 points 9 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
But it seems often that women wanting to leave men because they are poor seems totally fine. E.g. "he has no ambition" "he doesn't take his career seriously".
A 19 year old girl I know dumped her 22 year old boyfriend, who, by all accounts, is a nice guy. I asked her why she ended it, and she said it's because he works in a bar, despite having a degree in physics, and she doesn't want to be with someone like that. I said that at 22, he's little more than a kid himself, so who cares what his job is? She said she wants a man with a good job. I was shocked to hear this kind of talk from someone so young, usually it's from older women who vastly overestimate their own worth.
[–]the_unseen_one 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
On the flip side, she's smart though. She has a much better chance of roping in a wealthy or 6 figure income man when she's young and perky than when she is middle aged and starting to show it. If you're going to leverage your look and sex appeal into getting an easy life, the smart person does it at peak appeal.
[–]jmg83 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I just hope this sucker sees her coming. She's already told me that she's going to be a billionaire. I asked if that wasn't a bit overly optimistic, if millionaire isn't a more realistic goal. She insisted that it's not good enough.
[–]the_unseen_one 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
She's delusional if she thinks she can rope a billionaire just by being young and cute. I doubt she even runs in those kinds of circles. Well, her disappointment will hit her hard and heavy, so she better settle soon or she's going to be like ever other middle aged woman that is pissed she couldn't find a "good" (enough) man for her desires.
[–]jmg83 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Oh, she reckons she's going to actually make the money, by being a businesswoman or something. I'll be interested to see if it actually happens.
[–]the_unseen_one 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Well them's some lofty goals, but more power to her for aiming high in that case.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
Have you ever worked in a hospital?
People get very emotional when loved ones are gravely ill. Can't count how any times I recall a woman pulling me to the side outside of the room to ask me if she should leave her husband because she can't handle the stress of caring for him and how does she "deserve to be happy". Obviously hospital staff can't say anything besides sorry and a hug but I will tell you it happens a lot. What doesn't really ever happen is a man asking me the same thing about his wife, probably because he would be painted as the most vile POS to ever walk to the earth for leaving his sick wife. But a woman always "deserves more from life".
[–]the_unseen_one 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The speed with which many wives will leave men lain low by circumstance or illness really saddens me. We've bred multiple generations of women without a concept of loyalty or integrity (not all, obviously, but more than enough to make this common) whose first instinct is jumping ship the moment things get rocky.
[–]KingRobotPrince 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I guess no matter how we progress in terms of gender equality, men are supporters and women are supported. That's why it's socially acceptable for women to leave a man who is physically or financially disabled. Another gender stereotype that no woman is complaining about.
The thing is, there has to be some balance. Like you can't have things this way and expect to be fully independant and do whatever you want. You can act like a princess who needs to be taken care of, but don't expect to sleep around or get your own way all the time.
It's like women demanding equality under the "men and women are the same" thing, then in the next breath asking a man to do something for them because it's dangerous or physically demanding.
[–]Red_means_go 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is all so true!
That's why the increasing quality of sexbots is beginning to terrify many women. Women are worth much more than vagina, but when they treat it like goddamned gold and don't bring anything else to the table, I'd choose a sexbot over a woman.
[–]iongantas -1 points0 points1 point 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Men should learn to sex their best bros instead.
[–]fengpi 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Of course, but why is her vagina better than all the others? That's a question I can never get an answer to.
Is it attached to a person who isn't a selfish suction-pit of unending demands about how a Real Man™ should do X, Y and Z but not A, B and (except when she feels like it once in a while) C?
[–]belil569 10 points11 points12 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
200lb and a failed semester attempting a gender studies degree.
[–]Swiss_Cheese9797 3 points4 points5 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You write for a living? Cuz this is gold...
[–]iongantas 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Well, she has a vagina of course.
[–]fengpi 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
What makes hers particularly special? Lined with Himalayan snow leopard fur, is it? Does it sing and dance? Tell jokes?
[–]iongantas 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I hear they monologue.
[–]g_squidman 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Have you read Cosmo? Yeah, neither have I, but the magazines at the the checkout stands are full of self improvement stuff on the covers.
[–]Hillary_For_Prison 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don't you know that reading a fitness article is the same thing as working out for an hour a day for an entire week?
[–]pooshhMao 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Meanwhile, what does Suzie Cosmoreader bring to the table that makes her worthy of this Real Man™ of whom there are so embarrassingly few in this world full of sub-human schmoes?
... her vagina?..
[–]fengpi 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes, as valuable as it may be, what is it that makes her vagina so much better than anybody else's?
[–]handklap 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
he's [insert your random fantasy unicorn here] but not too much [random fantasy unicorn]...
lmao
[–]Rabid_Pink_Princess 38 points39 points40 points 9 years ago* (16 children) | Copy Link
Jesus Christ my vagina just died. Thank you cosmopolitan.
In general I can't even understand how a man who puts such an effort at following some stupid standard to become a real man could actually result confident.
[–]fengpi 25 points26 points27 points 9 years ago* (13 children) | Copy Link
You'll notice that there is a certain asymmetry to these Real Man™ harangues insofar that you don't typically see men's magazines compiling long lists attempting to define what a Real Woman™ is. That's because having a female body is enough to define a woman as being such. And she needn't do anything to be worthy of a Real Man™ except to avoid being obese and unpleasant.
Edit: Oh, and your final comment fails to realize that the Real Man™ doesn't need to expend any energy into attaining those ridiculous standards, for it all comes so naturally to him and no effort is required! Such is the Real Man™: he makes it look easy and remains stoically silent about any wimpy inner pain he may have. (And he doesn't have any, thank God-- until you snap your fingers and demand that he "open up" and share it-- and then you instantly sneer at him for being a weakling when he does. The precious "share your feelings/you're ridiculous for having those feelings" cycle of badgering must continue ad infinitum...)
[–]jmg83 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
except to avoid being obese and unpleasant.
Even this means nothing these days. A guy I know, who is fat himself (nice guy, but he looks exactly how you'd expect a neckbeard to look) goes to these club nights where men can meet fat chicks.
[–]fengpi 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Fat chicks, amputees and midget-women can have some niche fetishists.
But there ain't too many gals out there with a homeless man fetish who wants to do it in a shopping cart full of discarded cans.
[–]jmg83 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
True. Unfortunately for those guys.
[–]Rabid_Pink_Princess 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
these club nights where men can meet fat chicks.
Seriously? Oo Do clubs especially about that actually exist? I'm Italian we are far behind on the clubs' landscape and that makes me curious... do these clubs promote that specific funcion, or does it somehow just happen?
[–]jmg83 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Here in the UK, there are several such club nights, venues get hired for these kind of events. As I understand it, these sort of things are started by larger ladies themselves. If that's what some guys are into, and if it makes the girls feel good about themselves, then great. Personally, though, if I had something about myself that I didn't like, but could change with effort, I wouldn't want to be part of something that would enable a lack of change.
[–]Rabid_Pink_Princess 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I didn't know of anything like this O_o, that's not healthy at all!
Personally I can't really understand some fat girls, they cry and say that being fat is the worse thing that ever happened to them (uuuuh... it's not something that hapened tho. But go explain it to them.) but they don't do anything about it. They find stupid excuses, sometimes they talk about misteryous ailments (bullshit, if you don't eat you don't magically generate fat. Ailments exist, but they are true 1 time out of 100, and they don't automatically make people fat). Then they look at me and hatefully say: Jesus... how can you be so slim? How?? Because I don't fucking eat two pizzas everytime I eat something and I do sports! But nope, fat girls look at a slim girl like she's lucky and has just been created that way. That's so fucking annoying,
A lot of these girls are totally oblivious and in denial and the society keeps reinforcing that attitude, and this clubs don't help at all. Accepting and promoting a problem is not a good alternative to fixing it. Especially unhealty problems like obesity...
[–]jmg83 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
At the risk of sounding cruel, places like this act as an affirmation for people who practice unhealthy lifestyles, that it's okay to carry on as you are, because there are people out there who are into that fat women. Ultimately, I don't really give a shit if a woman is fat, but what I don't like is being shamed for not thinking they're attractive. I'm not their father, it's not my job to coddle them.
[–]Rabid_Pink_Princess 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
what I don't like is being shamed for not thinking they're attractive
I can believe it, it's very stupid an it's victim behaviour. I have a different perspective, as a girl, as I've said, my bad experiences with fat girls are about them who tell me with disgust and envy that I'm lucky because I'm slim and that's unfair. And if I answer them that it's not a gift but I work on my appearances every day because I care about it. Then they act shocked and treat me like an insensitive cunt who doesn't respect their misfortune.
It's the same behaviour: They are poor, unlucky souls and if you don't sympathize with their misfortune and try to judge em then you are an insensitive monster who should be fixed. Just another shaming tactic
you don't typically see men's magazines compiling long lists attempting to define what a Real Woman™ is
Really? I don't have any idea I gotta say, I don't have much experience reading men's magazines for obvious reasons, but are you sure there's nothing like it? I mean... articles about a woman who can cook, forgive you if you cheat, make her best to always look good, and things like this? (Which personally I'm okay with, I'm totally fine fitting a female traditional role, so I'm okay when people talk about it)
The precious "share your feelings/you're ridiculous for having those feelings" cycle of badgering must continue ad infinitum.
Yeah... I've had experience with a man who really didn't want to open up, and in the end he explained me that when he opened up with his ex she always humiliated him for it.
I can't really understand why so many girls seem to act like that, personally I believe that a man who shows his feelings and thougts and can tell me when something hurt him and demand for respect about it is more manly than a man who fakes he has no feelings.
[–]fengpi 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
I don't have much experience reading men's magazines for obvious reasons, but are you sure there's nothing like it?
Obviously, every individual has preferences in a partner and everybody wishes to have an excellent partner, but to make a list of demanded benchmarks that a female must live-up to in order to gain men's approval as some kind of Real Woman™... I won't say it's "non-existent" but it sure as hell ain't common practice to see that in print. Maybe some schmendrick somewhere wrote something like that, but it would look pretty odd and uncommon. I would find it peculiar and laughable, not to mention tacky and arrogant.
What I am driving at: existing with a womb is enough to make one a Real Woman™ but a man actually needs to do something in order for him to be considered something other than a disposable mook. That is the underlying phenomenon to which I am pointing. A woman exists with inherent value, a man needs to work very hard- perhaps acquire a lot of money and accomplishments- before he's considered valuable. What's more, those things can be taken away and he can be more easily destroyed when they are. A woman needs to do something pretty outrageously shameful before she relinquishes her womanhood in the eyes of others.
[–]Rabid_Pink_Princess 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
existing with a womb is enough to make one a Real Woman™ but a man actually needs to do something
That's a very smart point, yes.
I think it's an obvious consequence of the sexual market, where the women represent the supply and the men the demand. For the same reason a promiscuous girl is normally considered a slut and a promiscuous man a playboy (even if feminism is trying to overturn this too...), because to be promiscuous a woman just needs a vagina, while a man needs to be outstanding somehow. And with the big importance that the majority of people confers to sexual life, I suppose it becomes normal that a man tries to understand how he can boost his chances to get laid, so the media speculate on it creating these stupid articles. While, as a woman, I don't like at all this modern idea of what a man should do, I think the main problem is what you said here:
What's more, those things can be taken away and he can be more easily destroyed when they are
Yes... In the end these advices have the result to create an even more exploitable man at the mercy of a woman's whims
[–]fengpi 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
because to be promiscuous a woman just needs a vagina, while a man needs to be outstanding somehow.
This is a key difference that feminists fail to get for some mindless reason. Once, I had a moron explode to me: "you can fuck as many women as you want and be called a stud!!1!!"
Uh, yeah. Sure. Sure I can do that. When does that start, btw?
[–]Rabid_Pink_Princess 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, I know, they are totally incapable of understanding perspectives.
I see the other side of this stupid complain: men scared by potential feminist outbursts (or just plain manginas I suppose), who called themself sluts talking with me. It happened many times, when I flirted with a guy and I said something like "You'll think I'm a slut ;)" that he answered: Don't worry, I'm a slut myself, I don't judge.
No, man, you are not a slut! Let's split up the roles!
[–]mwobuddy 8 points9 points10 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You're a real man when you're a well trained lion in the circus. You got potential to bite someone's head but never do it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vU1sIV3H8f4
[–]mwobuddy 29 points30 points31 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Many of those are actually Histrionic Borderline wishlists, because they want to avoid being caught for cheating, and want to have an emotional pincushion to tell how bad their exes were (which is itself both a warning to the current partner to 'stay straight' and also an evaluative process in itself of how much shit you'll take, like listening to that).
He doesn't call any of his ex-girlfriends "crazy." Some guys are quick to say that all his exes are "crazy" and that's why he is no longer with them (not because they found out he sucks and rightfully dumped him). But a real man will be honest with you and say why the relationship ultimately failed, and also won't talk shit about someone he once very much liked!
Okay, you shouldn't talk shit about exes.
That time you talked about how your ex was a total garbage monster, he listened attentively and asked thoughtful questions. He didn't tell you to stop comparing him to your ex or try to sympathize with the dude who was objectively terrible to you — this real man listened like he actually cares, because he does actually care! It's incredible.
Oh you should talk shit about your exes.
Uhh, Im confused.
[–]fengpi 15 points16 points17 points 9 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
You have to understand: she can talk about exes or anything she pleases because Her Feelings. He must gallantly watch his words and thoughtfully stay silent at all the right times because Her Feelings.
a real man(™) will be honest with you and say why the relationship ultimately failed
He will take personal responsibility for all relationship failures, as all Real Men™ must, such as: "I failed to be a generous and attentive lover" rather than "she would steal my money, go get drunk and fuck strangers." (Note: genuine honesty is not to be confused with the kind of factually-massaged and selectively-voiced "honesty" a woman wishes to hear, lest the Real Man™ suddenly transform into an insensitive jerk, as they so frequently seem to do.)
[–]Greg_W_Allan 11 points12 points13 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sorry, ladies, you are in no way qualified to define a "real" man. Give it away. It makes you look conceited.
[–]double-happiness 7 points8 points9 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Another Cosmo gem: 6 Ways to Train Your Boyfriend
One that has personal resonance for me is 'He Lacks Social Graces', because my last girlfriend said my social skills could 'use some work', (which I would accept), but then in the end she unexpectedly broke up with me by text, which strikes me as a tremendous faux pas, that even most teenagers would know not to do. So AFAIAC, it just goes to show, it cuts both ways.
[–]KingRobotPrince 5 points6 points7 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I have no interest in having a conversation with a woman who tries to get me to do what she wants through attempting to shame me, let alone be in an intimate relationship with one.
You should judge yourself and others by your own values, not what society tries to tell you. It's tragic when otherwise successful relationships fail because one side has read something stupid in a magazine and thought that they need to change their otherwise happy life (normally spending money) just because they saw a stupid article. Then again, it's a helpful sort of 'universal indicator', if a women starts chatting nonsense about an article she read, that she isn't the one for you.
[–]jmg83 6 points7 points8 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm not going to read it, but I can guess the sort of things it would say. What most women who'll read this don't get is that a man who meets all these criteria would almost certainly be too good for them.
[–]youreallmeatanyway 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That picture looks like a moderately muscular 15 year old.
[–]Funcuz 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Want to know if your man is a real man? We've designed a simple test!
Stand near your man. Extend your index finger. Push. Do you feel something solid? He's real.
[–]MraBob 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
LOL
[–]Tone1337 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Should be titled 11 telltale signs of a real man and the 1 reason you'll still sleep with the asshole dude bro.
Nothing like having a bunch of women telling a man how to be a man, especially with those ways always coming down to "be my personal servant, expect nothing from me in return, and worship the ground I walk on". I hope no woman takes this garbage seriously.
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.created by /u/dream-hunter
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Apparently she has a vagina. This is all she needs to contribute.
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