2nd Date / Potential Sleepover

youllknowwhenitstime · 2023-10-25T17:16:57+00:00

Dont sleep over if you're not ready for sex. That demonstrates a lack of desire, not your purity. (Saying "I'm not able to sleepover so soon" demonstrates your purity.) There's literally no other reason to sleepover if not to start a seduction game, and while there's a natural thrill to that... If your goal is to demonstrate a good girl image, you won't enter a game so close to the ledge in the first place.

1 1/2 hours journey time is not a big deal to get back to home at night.

Dehydrated_Jellyfish · 2023-10-25T17:24:57+00:00

Life rule: don’t plan a sleepover at a man’s house unless you are prepared for sex.

Jenneapolis · 2023-10-25T19:06:09+00:00

I honestly don’t even go to a man’s house or invite them over if I’m not prepared for sex. This is not to say that if I’m in the situation, I’m obligated and have to go through with it, I can say no, but men really don’t like that kind of rejection so that no could mean the end of any potential future. To avoid this entirely, I just wait until I’m ready to have sex to go to someone’s house/ have them over. That way neither person is disappointed.

Cosima_Fan_Tutte · 2023-10-25T17:50:20+00:00

Don't isolate yourself with a man unless you're planning to sleep with him or you don't mind being seduced. I'm going to stitch this on a sweater and gift it to my daughter when she's a teenager, lol.

There are millions upon millions of cases of women saying "we were just going to hang out but one thing led to another and..."

leosandlattes · 2023-10-25T17:32:36+00:00

Realistically, what’s the benefit of you sleeping over? I get that the idea is that you’ll have more time to spend together, but what else would you be doing during sleeping hours if not, well, sex? Or activities that often lead to it? He’s a man; he knows that you know what he’s offering even if he says there’s no pressure to.

If it’s to avoid a traveling home at night and then traveling back in the morning (if you have plans for both days of the weekend together), I think getting a hotel or room elsewhere is a better option if you can afford it. A sleepover on the second date is, I think, generally against the good girl thing.

Due-Selection966 · 2023-10-26T01:04:44+00:00

My personal opinion, a lot of talking is nothing.

A lot of men talk to me a lot. The moment I express disinterest in sex or dating them, they disappear.

Criminal men will keep talking and move their hands on you.

I feel like this guy is trying to make you feel comfortable enough to get you into bed.

How did you two meet?

What do you mean by a good clean image? Having sex or sleeping over isn't dirty.

ClarityByHilarity · 2023-10-27T01:45:47+00:00

Too soon, keep him waiting longer and go back home or get a hotel room and meet up the next day.

As everyone else has said, never sleep over unless you’re ready for sex. That should mean you both have committed to a monogamous relationship.

anna_alabama · 2023-10-25T21:00:15+00:00

I slept over my husband’s house on our first date, and I thought it was perfectly fine 🤷🏼‍♀️

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_hannahm123 · 2023-10-27T09:00:19+00:00

Thank you all!! I'm definitely going to wait and go home after the date. Fingers crossed it all works out <3

FishandThings · 2023-10-28T06:44:17+00:00

I would saying sleeping over would be a bad idea and you certainly should not sleep with him yet.

You are still in the vetting process of your relationship. A lot of physical contact and s*x causes a type of bonding to build that literally changes the way your brain processes information about your SO - it sort of puts you in the honeymoon phase quicker than otherwise. You do not want to do this too early in a relationship as this kind of bonding blinds you to red flags and negatives about your significant other.

This is one of the reasons why people who sleep together before getting married have a higher rate of divorce than those who wait. Those who waited did not bond so quickly and thus were better able to vet each other, and break up and find someone better if needed.

Your priority in dating is to find a Captain who is good at leading you, and to give yourself the best chance at that, you need to keep yourself as clear headed as practicable.

Flat_Shower · 2023-10-25T17:29:17+00:00

Alternative suggestion; if sleeping over helps the logistics, state your intent up front “It is a long trip, it would be great to stay the night. Do you have a comfy couch I can sleep on? Should I bring my own blanket or pillow to sleep on the couch?” Men can misperceive intent when the decision to stay over sounds spur of the moment.

I don’t like him saying “there’s no pressure to do anything you don’t want to do” - I get rape-y vibes from this comment. “Don’t worry, I won’t murder you”

AutoModerator · 2023-10-25T17:03:03+00:00

Title: 2nd Date / Potential Sleepover

Full text: Hi there!

I've been speaking with this guy for nearly 2 months now, we talk all day everyday - he's very sweet and attentive, and I really like him. He does live slightly outside of my hometown (about an hour and a half journey on the train).

We've been on one dinner date together, had a blast and parted ways at the end of the evening, he travelled to me to my hometown. This weekend, I am going to his hometown and he has offered for me to sleepover if I like but has made it very clear there is no pressure to 'do anything' I don't want to (and I know he's being serious).

My question is, as I like him and I want to keep a good clean image for myself, is it bad if I sleepover? Even if nothing 'happens' between us apart from a kiss?

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Title	2nd Date / Potential Sleepover
Author	_hannahm123
Upvotes	14
Comments	26
Date	October 25, 2023 5:03 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/17g9lch/2nd_date_potential_sleepover/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/2nd-date-potential-sleepover.1236330 https://theredarchive.com/post/1236330

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