Hey RPW.

I really really like my coworker but am finding it hard to connect with him.

I am 29F. He is American and in his early 30s.

He is very shy, very reserved, very blunt and a little curt. He also doesn't usually speak a lot in the office and doesn't smile much.

He is also very creative, very honest, very hardworking, very intelligent, has a dry sense of humour, has a lovely smile when he does smile, and is very interesting to talk to when I have actually had a conversation with him.

I really like him and want to build a better rapport with him but it's really hard. I get nervous around him and feel shy myself, and I try to talk to him but it's hard and I don't want to come across as weird.

I asked him out for coffee at lunch and he said he wanted to be alone at lunch to destress and relax. Honestly, sometimes I need that too, so I don't really blame him.

Any advice?