I’ve gone through 10-15 plates in the past year, some of them much faster than others. Instead of sharing just the particular experiences, I’ve made a list of guidelines for newcomers and myself to follow when dealing with plates. If your plate has a much lower SMV than you, these don’t matter as much since they’ll put up with quite a bit to keep you around.

Everything here should be nothing new to readers here - it’s all in the sidebar. I like having this list as something to refer back to occasionally.

I don’t really participate in reddit comments so hopefully this doesn’t get auto-removed.

Keep them off the pedestal

This one is toughest when you’re first starting out, especially if it's been a long time since you’ve had great sex. When you’ve had the best sex in your life, you know it. It's easy to be scared of losing it, sending you right back into BP tendencies. When I was with an ex-stripper she completely blew my mind, causing me to over-commit to wanting to see her more often and settling for “just a date” without sex. Needless to say I didn’t see her after that, I lost abundance mentality and she definitely picked up on it.

Don't “spill the beans”

If you tell a plate your life goals, she will lose interest significantly faster. You want to slowly trickle her information about what actually makes you tick. This will happen over the course of a few months even if you say very little about yourself. 2/2 times that I’ve told a plate about my actual ambitions I can see things clicking into place in her head, followed by a quick loss of interest in the next few weeks. Don't solve the puzzle for her, let her enjoy trying to figure you out. When you’re trying to solve a puzzle, the tendency is to “cheat” and ask for the solution. It’s a shitty puzzle if you don’t have to struggle to find the answer.

Ensure regular meetups

This one can depend on the girl, but girls with similar SMV to you will move on much sooner if you’re not seeing them at least once every 2 weeks. The higher SMV, the more times they’re told how gorgeous they are every day. Unless you're really getting their rocks off you’ll need to increase how frequently you see them. The regularity of your meetups can be used to reinforce good behaviours; if she cooks for you, drops other plans or is otherwise going above and beyond seeing her more often is the best reward to keep that happening. On the other hand, if she’s flaking or not meeting expectations giving her a week of silence then setting up a new meet will either teach them the boundaries or you lose them. If you do lose them, it's worth it as you’ve just weeded out a time waster.

Make them laugh, keep it lighthearted

This seems like common sense, but I definitely noticed myself relaxing as I got to know them better and not aiming for the mindset of amused mastery. Even after 3 months of regular meetups, if you don’t make them laugh or smile when they see you they’ll soon lose interest and find reasons to meet up less. You’ve never “won them over” so don’t treat them any differently.

Take them out, play the dread game

For me, this is important to keep up the dread game. Unless you can take her out to a public place (bars or clubs with friends are best), It’s very hard to make it clear you have other options. There’s little dread in your bedroom and living room. I get a lot of my plates through mutual friends, so occasionally when that group went out I’d make sure to join them and bring her along. I get pretty dancy and talkative so just talking to other girls does the trick - this has the double benefit of being fun and keeping your skills fresh. If I don’t socialize with new people and do approaches every month it’s hard to stay sharp. It’s even easier to approach girls if you’re out with a plate as you have the “nothing to lose” mentality of having a more concrete option. Arriving with girls and having a group of them around you also increases your social perception and makes other girls more responsive to your approaches. Don’t worry about pissing off your plate, accusations (very rarely happen) are easily brushed off with an agree and amplify as you’re in a public situation and they don’t want to cause any embarrassment.

Blow her mind

I would say the Sex God Method is required reading if you want to keep plates spinning with less effort and more enjoyment for you. I won’t go into detail as that book covers it much better than I could here but the summary is that great sex needs four components: Dominance, Emotion, Variety and Immersion. Go find another post to explain these more, then get the book. I used to be of the opinion that I should just wing it and enjoy myself but I can promise you that trying to stick to a more defined set of goals makes the experience better for yourself and your plate.

Aim for two or more plates

This was an important step for me early on, previously I thought that since I didn’t have much time to invest it would be better to focus on one plate at a time. This is a mistake because you need to always be open to options and approaching new girls. Having two girls or more on rotation is the fastest way to abundance mentality and makes holding on to all the other tips mentioned a hell of a lot easier. Beyond providing a backup should you drop a plate, having a second girl will make both relationships easier to manage as they are far less likely to try for a LTR when you aren’t giving off that vibe.

If any of this was news to you go and read the sidebar again. All of this and more is in there, with more context and in depth explanations. These are the points in particular that I struggled with the most and need to focus on going forward. Feedback appreciated as I'm still learning.