Response: Girl from OkCupid

slooberki · 2015-11-20T22:56:59+00:00

Fuck it I say kudos to you for posting here and hearing TRP defend its own statement, rather than posting it to /r/feminism and having them all twist our words and demonize us.

But don't underestimate how much we NEED this space. It's not just a place with "some good advice" with "concerning motivations". It's our last bastion of sanity where we are allowed to talk about being men.

Thotwrecker · 2015-11-20T22:38:40+00:00

One thing to understand is that 95+% of men are way too "beta" on the spectrum between the two. The reason TRP is going to focus on developing what we call "alpha" traits or high "SMV" is because nobody needs any help developing beta traits. You get those by virtue of living in modern society and going to an environment like school. A guy doesn't need us to teach him about putting a woman's needs before his own because he gets taught that by his momma.

He doesn't need us to teach him to communicate in an asexual, neutered fashion (interview style "what do you do for a living" type questions when you're at a bar with a girl for example) because he's an expert at that shit.

So we're going to be focusing on the extremes. If your average guy tries to incorporate some extreme traits, they are probably going to wind up being OK. Like your BF. You set a high standard, and you try to live up to that standard. You fail, but through shooting high, you make sure you land high.

That is the fundamental difference between men and women, and really what this whole discussion hinges upon. Men create a mission for themselves - a vision of the mountaintop, the idealized person that they could become. They know they can't get there, but they try anyway, because through pursuing that extreme, they will get somewhere in the middle.

Women see that they cannot get to their mountaintop, declare that extremes are bad and employ a "moderate" strategy. One that's lower effort and less risky and allows them to think "hey I'm doing something!" Like a juice cleanse or an oprah diet without any exercise. Inevitably they fail, and then declare wherever they are to be the mountaintop. (Fat is beautiful campaigns, don't shame, this is what a healthy woman looks like, etc stuff like that).

Your boyfriend has to shoot for being a stud player and a boss ballin' ass motherfucker. Because if he shoots for that, when he falls short, he'll be a slightly above average guy with a self-confidence, interesting hobbies, a knowledge of how to flirt with women, but still plenty of beta traits that prevent him from actually being a player. It's like when I read Jack Welch's management book. I'm not deluded enough to think I'm about to manage a multi billion dollar company - but if I shoot for employing his insane standard of efficiency and optimization, maybe my team at work will improve 30% and I'll get a promotion.

Gettingaware · 2015-11-20T22:21:09+00:00

Beofre this thread blows up, keep some perspective...

This is a woman, she doesnt understand rationale, shes not here to have her mind changed, she wants attention and drama, and a reason to tell herself she is right.

She isnt and hopefully most people dont waste there valuable time here doing anything here but laughing at her pathetic attempt to change all you good men.

Peace and love brothers.

redpillschool · 2015-11-20T21:47:59+00:00

The reasoning is concerning.

Thought policing, this is the feminine imperative at it's finest. She wants to control the thought and motive behind actions, even if the results were the same.

It's not good to be attractive and free thinking.

Why improve yourself because women are irrational and need a leader? Improve yourself because you're a human with a life that shouldn't be wasted.

Do it for yourself! That's it! Or, improve yourself because the game is stacked against you.

Tease because you know she can take it and you appreciate her comebacks.

I feel like I'm at a yoga class.

Don't neg because you've perceived some threat to your manhood.

Projection and solipsism. It's not perceived a threat to our manhoods. That's just what you think it is because you can't step outside of yourself for two seconds and look at the game for what it is.

The one ideal that does bother me is the idea that guys should "be manlyTM ", as though "manly" has a single definition: get ripped, get sexed, don't trust women with vulnerability.

That sounds like a terrible definition, imagine if guys followed it!

Define it yourself, and be confident about it. I don't care if your hobby is DOTA or the violin, as long as it makes you happy and doesn't take over your life.

Ah, age old female advice- just be yourself! Who cares what's effective or attractive to women in general? Just do what you want to do and the right woman is waiting right around the corner!

No offense to you, but understand from a dude's perspective, when it's sink or swim, not a lot of us are interested in strokes that don't keep you afloat.

I like this ratio as it is in my SO. I don't want it to change, because I like that he's dorky and cries at nostalgic movies and gives me sweet compliments and asks me for advice and lets me test nail polish on him.

No doubt you do, but our rule of thumb is- watch what they do, not what they say.

If we listened to what women say they want, well, we'd all be feminists sitting on our thumbs at this point.

SkorchZang · 2015-11-20T22:10:12+00:00

Sweetie, calm down. It's OK to be madly attracted to red pillers. There are many-many good people here.

You are just exploring your sexuality and empowering yourself to reach boldly for where that virile magic truly happens.

Titanstone · 2015-11-20T22:52:33+00:00

I never saw what was so important in the first thread to be honest. Some dude met some chick on OKC. He looked at redpill (along with MULTIPLE other sites most likely) while setting up his profile. His research paid off.

This really doesn't even pertain to redpill. I mean this stuff happens everyday. Just because a thumbnecked bumpkin can pick up a landwhale redneck at walmart doesn't mean anything. What nobody likes to talk about is the fact that most of time, meeting girls is more about opportunity than anything. People here thinking "omg he read redpill and picked up, now girlfriend is mad about it". She doesn't seem mad. It seems like a dude on OKC found a girl who was both sexually available and interested. This is how the MAJORITY of relationships start. If it's not OKC, it's at a party, through a group of friends, or an organization/volunteer/meetup. Most girls are not dating dudes who tried to pick them up at a starbucks.

The difference here is, we want high SMV girls. We want to be high SMV guys. We want HB8, 9, 10s. The redpill aims to play with the sharks in the deep end. Any chump who can open his mouth can score with a girl as long as he is playing the numbers game. He will eventually meet a girl who is sexually available, and says "good enough" so she has something to hang on before swinging the branch.

Also OP, why are you not in a relationship with the dude at 2.5 months? That amount of time isn't "just met", and I'm highly doubting he is the party who won't make it official as it sounds like he's giving away all his time. Unless you're not banging or something, which would be a horrific shame.

rmoviesok · 2015-11-20T22:57:01+00:00

He lets you test nail polish on him? Let's just forget the whole thing, he doesn't read here.

RP-Doctor · 2015-11-20T22:45:46+00:00

The reasoning is concerning. Why improve yourself because women are irrational and need a leader? Improve yourself because you're a human with a life that shouldn't be wasted.

You're thinking too emotionally here. You improve yourself to meet your desires. Women being irrational isn't a desire, it's not why he's improving himself. He's improving himself to meet and attract a girl. Women acting the way women do is just a factor he has to consider.

Now, we're all socially conditioned to a certain extent. This largely affects our "alpha-to-beta ratio." He realized his social conditioning was not getting him what he desired, so he improved himself by following advice outside of his "natural" sources of social conditioning (life experience). Every guy learned to attract women from somewhere. Usually it's older brothers, friends, fathers, or simple trial and error. His actions are no less "real" than anyone else's.

Tease because you know she can take it and you appreciate her comebacks. Don't neg because you've perceived some threat to your manhood.

From a woman's perspective, she (and most other women) wants him to show this type of behavior, but that might not be in the guy's wheelhouse naturally. For a woman, that's not an issue. She's not attracted to him, so she moves on to a guy who does exhibit these behaviors, and in her mind, he moves on to a "nice" girl who wants a guy like him. The trouble is, that "nice" girl doesn't exist. He isn't teasing because of a perceived threat to his manhood. He's teasing you because he wants you to like him, because his new social conditioning is telling him to do so, and because it's working.

Look at it rationally. It doesn't matter where your guy learned his social conditioning. Say a guy learned everything he knew about women from his older brother, but his older brother was an asshole with misogynistic ideas. Now say that guy is amazing for you, treats you well, and makes you feel good. Would you turn around and break up with that guy because his source of social conditioning is an ass? Of course not. He's clearly able to filter out the bullshit that you don't like on here, so stop thinking about it so hard and look at his actions.

Also, he doesn't even go to the gym, so obviously he's not totally sucked into the mindset here. As far as I can tell all this guy did was search, "how to set up an online dating profile" and click on a reddit link.

PandaMania3 · 2015-11-21T01:19:00+00:00

Guys supposedly being Manly^TM is being Alpha, which attracted you to begin with.

You only come to appreciate the beta side of him later on. Which is cool, for now.

You've also only know about this sub (through him) briefly to be able to see what you are currently benefiting from him through this sub.

In short, your appreciation of this sub is through what your appreciate off your SO, when things go Sour you'll just simply attribute that ths sub is a place for woman haters.

Enjoy your brief stay here, just don't try to change things here because it doesn't seem to fit with what you like.

max_peenor · 2015-11-20T22:40:53+00:00

Those exaggerations were used to create a false narrative.

You should go throw your TV into the dumpster. Now that you have started your awakening, this will be a point of endless disappointment.

don't trust women with vulnerability

Said the spider to the fly. It may cause momentary happy, fuzzy warm bunny feelings, but in the long run it will be a problem. One day, you will take any vulnerability that your not-perfect boyfriend showed you and use it against him. This is not criticism. This is just the way it is.

MentORPHEUS · 2015-11-20T23:05:10+00:00

Not pleased that the poster made up things and presented them as quotes. More often than not, the examples culled from other subs are less than rigorous about quoting the OP, and stretch the meaning of the post to fit their own narrative. In law, they call this fruit of the poisoned tree.

Thanks for coming to clear the air, people here at TRP should take note.

Derbi50 · 2015-11-21T00:57:41+00:00

This guy lets you paint him with fingernail polish, cries at movies, and doesn't lift?

I can only imagine how beta he was before he found TRP.

FrameWalker · 2015-11-21T04:00:50+00:00

he's dorky and cries at nostalgic movies and gives me sweet compliments and asks me for advice and lets me test nail polish on him.

Let's watch a train wreck from all over the world LOL.

2015-11-21T03:55:09+00:00

TRP is the thing that drove me to be successful. I've earned all of my success so far, but it provided me a break from the societal narrative and a strong suggestion to embrace that which I had kept hidden away for so long. And it worked. I work better with myself and others - including women I'm in relationships with. I don't follow these practices because somebody said so - I follow them because I tried them, learned that they're actually a large part of who I've always been (just suppressed), and that they work. I like women quite a lot, even though I think you guys are a bit loony at times.

LionLegacy · 2015-11-21T05:47:50+00:00

I don't see why you bothered to post this.
What are you standing to gain?

You can't come into TRP and telling us yor view when you probably haven't spent more than a few days at best learning about it.

It takes months, even years for men to come to term with what TRP really means and you expect your input to be of any value just because you are a woman?

The downvotes speak for themselves, but do try to be a bit less solipsistic next time you post about a subject you have almost no knowledge or experience with.

And your boyfriend is not RP, if loosely following advice makes him Alpha then I'm a chef if I read a cookbook

cloudstryfe · 2015-11-22T02:29:55+00:00

Im late to the party but thank you for showing up and engaging in discussion. Much respect for that， and best of luck to you and your almost-bf

Master1176 · 2015-11-21T02:11:29+00:00

Your original post was asking for advice about your BF, so let me give you some. You had doubts about TRP, but you like the way he is in general. You're overthinking it, and you're not trusting him enough. If you believe he is a good man at his core, then stop worrying about it, and stop arguing with red pillers online lol. Just let this thing die, and hug your man and do something nice for him.

There's something we say on here often - Red Pill is like a buffet of knowledge. Take what you want and leave the rest. Trust him to do that. From what you originally said about him, he's already striking a balance. Like another poster said, the best of us truly are the men of fairy tales. My LTR is very happy, the happiest she's ever been in a relationship. I do my job well, and some of that is because of what I've learned here. But most of it is just me. We're not misogynists - in fact, we're the best thing to happen to women in 50 years. Trust him and let him be the captain, and you will have a long and fulfilling relationship with him.

J_Dizzle1000 · 2015-11-21T07:25:15+00:00

Anyone else's brain explode trying to keep up with the comments? Haha

Whiskytoast · 2015-11-21T21:59:43+00:00

look at that hamster spin, fuck coal we need to find away to harness this shit for the good of the environment.

GingersInParis · 2015-11-21T22:13:39+00:00

The reasoning is concerning. Why improve yourself because women are irrational and need a leader? Improve yourself because you're a human with a life that shouldn't be wasted. Tease because you know she can take it and you appreciate her comebacks. Don't neg because you've perceived some threat to your manhood.

Honestly, does it even matter why your boyfriend did something?

Billee_Boyee · 2015-11-22T10:10:29+00:00

1: "I was accurately characterized, but since a synonym was used I shall attempt to discredit the entire premise."

2: "I used the word 'devastated' when nobody else did, thus using exaggeration to create a false narrative while bitching about exaggerations used to create false....never mind."

2a: I neg because it amuses me. Don't project your own solipsistic perceived threats to your womanhood as my weakness.

2c:" I liked his profile, we went out and wound up dating exclusively."

"we haven't used the terms "boyfriend" or "girlfriend" officially because it's been 2.5 months since we met.

Again with the synonyms. Words have meaning. "Exclusive relationship" is the same as 'boyfriend and girlfriend", unless it is 'husband and wife", especially when flavored with "we see each other every day"

I dunno why I'm trying to reason with a hamster wheel with tits. I guess I'm done, though I could continue if there was any hope some glimmer of comprehension would eke through.

Lets try feelz.

Face it bitch, you got pwned.

Edit: syntax

AyoFoYayo · 2015-11-23T18:32:25+00:00

This whole thread is pointless and reiterates the same ol story. You can read all this information on the sidebar.

Why do we allow such posts?

Edit:word

NameOfAction · 2015-11-21T14:32:00+00:00

So the post was probably twisted. It wasn't very well recieved. If they were trying to twist things to make it sound better to rp readers they failed

2015-11-21T00:35:21+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Response: Girl from OkCupid

Everyone has alpha and beta traits. That ratio is different in everyone.

If having both alpha and beta traits makes you a red piller, then I'm attracted to red pillers - no one else exists.

Comments

Title	Response: Girl from OkCupid
Author	ohkcthrow
Upvotes	0
Comments	110
Date	November 20, 2015 9:25 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3tm6px/response_girl_from_okcupid/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/response-girl-from-okcupid.38292 https://theredarchive.com/post/38292