Summary

Approval seeking behavior towards women is the biggest threat to masculine frame.

Why Do Men Seek Approval from Women?

Because we were trained to do so from an early age. If you were raised by a single mother or strong mother/weak father, educated by female teachers, regularly listen to pop music and watch television, you were conditioned to seek the approval of women. Even men who appear to be RP on the surface but are constantly seeking the attention and affections of women (ex. hip hop artists who obsessively rap about women and peacock around them) are guilty of this.

Examples of Approval Seeking Behavior Towards Women

  • Asking permission when it isn’t required.

  • Frequently saying you’re sorry.

  • Seeking compliments and validation from women.

  • Giving women insincere and undeserved compliments to get their attention and approval.

  • Bad-mouthing other men to gain the approval of women.

  • Failing to challenge poor service or treatment.

  • Faking expertise on a subject because you’re afraid to admit that you aren’t knowledgeable.

  • Changing or softening opinions to avoid disapproval.

  • Attention-seeking behavior around women.

  • Changing your personality to get the approval of women.

Why Is Approval Seeking Behavior Toxic – A Few Reasons

  • Approval seeking makes men needy, which is a feminine trait.

  • Seeking women’s approval gives women the power to define male worth and gives control of relationships to women.

  • Seeking women’s approval creates anger towards women. We seek approval from people that we place on a pedestal and ultimately resent them if they can’t live up to our lofty expectations. This is the primary source of anger towards women: expecting the kind of behavior, affection and approval from them that they can’t deliver.

How Can You Stop Seeking Approval?

  • Think “Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust”. Remember that we all came in and will go out the same way and believe to your core that no one has intrinsically higher value than you.

  • Develop a code of behavior and live by it. Don’t live your life to please others. Do the right thing by your code.

  • Practice saying what you think and sticking with it. Don’t argue or seek validation for your positions. Develop informed opinions and stick with them. If someone challenges your position, change the subject, ridicule or redirect and force them to defend their position (see Donald Trump).

  • Learn to please yourself and enjoy your own company. Go to bars, movies and other places by yourself or with a male friend with the purpose of enjoying yourself and not picking up women (side note – it’s always fun to see how women who expect you to hit on them react when you ignore them). Travel by yourself and appreciate the experience. Develop hobbies that bring you satisfaction. If you go monk mode, use the time to cultivate new interests that you are passionate about.

  • Learn to live without pussy if necessary. Thirst is a major frame killer. Make women a hobby and not your mission. Be prepared to walk away if your woman isn’t acting right.

  • Limit use of social media, which is a female dominated, validation seeking circle jerk that encourages approval seeking behavior.

  • Practice demanding good service. If you’re not used to this, it may take a while. If you don’t like the food at a restaurant, send it back. Weak drink? Ask for another one. Think your mechanic is ripping you off? Ask for a line by line justification of the estimate and refuse to give him your business unless you’re satisfied with his answers. Bring out your “Inner Prick”.

  • Maintain your testosterone levels. Passive, approval seeking behavior is sometimes the result of low T levels. Get checked often and maintain normal levels.

  • Always remember: nice guys finish last.

Resource

No More Mr. Nice Guy by Robert Glover.