40-something divorcee asks Dear Abby "The Big Question": Where Are All The Good Men?!

lorum_ipsum_dolor · 2024-05-10T12:27:00+00:00

I'm scratching my head over what she means by "my previous relationships and marriage look like intentional hits". It's got to be code for something but unfortunately my Enigma Machine is in the shop right now.

Regarding the whole notion of "waiting for a divorce" I'm fairly certain she's convinced herself this is some sort of genius life hack that borders on Nobel Prize winning sociology material. I'm sure she's annoyed over the fact that this strategy wasn't acknowledged for being the genius move she knows it is.

After reflection, she'll no doubt realize that she can't simply sit back and be passive, she needs to be proactive and "make the divorce happen". If she can find a really good man, she can position herself between him and his wife and once he realizes how wonderful she is, he'll be more than happy to abandon his wife and family to help her in the quest for everlasting happiness.

It's simple really. Why be part of the problem when you can be the entire problem.

Overkillengine · 2024-05-10T12:46:36+00:00

There are plenty of good men out there.^[1] Should have cashed in her Golden Ticket before it expired. You know, instead of fucking around for 20+ years.

So many women take it for granted that men will want to marry them. They don't put an iota of thought into the concept that maybe, just maybe, there is some form of payment that incentivizes a man to invest in a woman via commingling assets.

And if a woman can no longer make that payment....a man no longer has reason to invest. He can enjoy everything else she has to offer just as easily and more cheaply without marriage or cohabitation.

Marriage is not a free retirement plan that all women are entitled to. You have to fucking earn it.

[1] There are more women than men alive at 40+ age ranges, but the men that are "good" vastly outratio the amount of women that are "good" in the same age range. (You've got to be a pretty big fuckup to make it to 30+ while still single as a woman thanks to the Home Vagina advantage) The problem is women aren't competing only against their own age bracket. They are competing with women in every age bracket younger than themselves too.

gabriel-kornilov · 2024-05-10T13:29:30+00:00

The men I've met all seem to enjoy to have their homes for themselves. It's kind of frightening.

Yup. She candidly wrote it. Just like accountability, it seems a man's simple happiness is a woman's kryptonite most of the time. She won't let that happen. That's what is really frightening.

CrunchyNutFruit · 2024-05-10T12:17:10+00:00

Sometimes, the juice ain't worth the squeeze.

FormerBTfan · 2024-05-10T12:50:23+00:00

Gentlemen do you smell that? That's the smell of the bearings smoking on the hamster wheel. Five alarm mental inferno in progress.

Mundane_Worldliness7 · 2024-05-10T13:28:56+00:00

Waiting for a divorce to happen often means making a divorce happen when you’ve found a top quintile guy. Also, has it occurred to her why perhaps some older guys want their homes to themselves, as opposed to having it taken over by some chick and her kids?

anonstuff25 · 2024-05-10T14:44:46+00:00

Anybody else surprised that her friends actually gave her real advice? If a man made it to their 40s being single then there is a good chance they want to remain single. If they have their shit together then they probably realized that there isn’t much a woman can add to their lives to make it better other than be a quick lay.

SouthAggravating2435 · 2024-05-10T16:15:57+00:00

Dear Abby developed Alzheimers around 2002 and died in 2013.

gntlbastard · 2024-05-10T21:10:59+00:00

"all the good men are taken..."

"waiting for a divorce to happen."

Meaning that those good men are eventually going to be divorced. Such a mystery why men are increasingly indifferent towards marriage?

somebullshitorother · 2024-05-11T04:49:42+00:00

AI response nailed it

Shylockvanpelt · 2024-05-11T10:38:14+00:00

"I want it all... and I want it noooow" mentality

SlavePrincessVibes3 · 2024-05-10T16:04:35+00:00

They never existed in the first place.

Title	40-something divorcee asks Dear Abby "The Big Question": Where Are All The Good Men?!
Author	moorekom
Upvotes	155
Comments	45
Date	May 10, 2024 12:10 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/1coo0uc/40something_divorcee_asks_dear_abby_the_big/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/40-something-divorcee-asks-dear-abby-the-big.1518120 https://theredarchive.com/post/1518120

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