FOMO on dating this summer triggering negative emotions

level_up_always · 2021-05-27T23:00:07+00:00

I hear you, it's tough. Feeling those emotions, not trying to resist them but instead letting them flow through you, feeling them (including a good cry if you need to - always makes me feel better) and accepting them is how we heal and grow. You are in the process of forging yourself, a phoenix rising from the ashes. That solid inner core you have always had deep down is being excavated, dug up by getting through all the loneliness, pain, and self doubt. You will become a new person. It's always darkest before the dawn. You will get through this and be so proud of yourself! And for you alone not because you felt like you had to present yourself a certain way to get some worthless scrote. This is the process and you're in it and you're doing great <3

Hhjjuuy · 2021-05-27T19:31:22+00:00

Forget about finding new connections, it sounds like you're not ready for it. Dig out some old connections. Spend time talking to friends and making plans with them. Find something you can do by yourself that you truly enjoy. Try to get outside, into green spaces with trees if possible.

You don't need a relationship to be okay, and certainly not an unhealthy one.

2021-05-27T21:36:46+00:00

OK, how 'bout this: You're allowed to miss someone who you had a toxic relationship with. They are not "all-bad" as people. They did have good qualities. It's just that people's good qualities can't and don't redeem the toxic qualities. Ultimately you have to take care of yourSELF, and part of that means validating your very real feelings of grief for the lost relationship. You can grieve, and sometimes that feels like depression and darkness. Maybe feeling your grief even *leads to* depression if you don't take a break from it, but you are allowed to grieve, AND pleasantly remember the good things about the relationship, while still acknowledging the bad things, all while letting the person go with love, without contact with the person. You can do this all on your own. This is part of loving yourself, honoring yourself.

its_me_phosphene · 2021-05-28T14:07:29+00:00

Just wanted to say I’m going through the exact same thing. Going on dates, even if they go well, just brings up the emotional connection I lost. The relationship wasn’t great but having the intimacy was and I miss it.

I’m taking a break from actively seeking out a connection and trying to focus on other things. I’m not ready to be vulnerable with someone right now

bananasplitchocodip · 2021-05-28T12:26:10+00:00

I’m going through the same. It comes with high and lows. Some days I’m all about focusing on me and other days I am really down for not really having any current connections or dating opportunities. But in the midst of all the confusion try to remember that the journey of working on yourself and being able to provide yourself what you need emotionally there is nothing better. Also, while we still have issues to fix I feel I am at the point to start building with others again, so reflect… you might be there too. You’re not missing the relationship so to speak, you’re just missing human connection ( unhealthy or healthy), which is totally normal.

throwaway23004345 · 2021-05-28T01:57:03+00:00

I feel the same way… bc I’m banned from tinder and hinge so I’m lonely (not like those apps are good anyway) I don’t come from a good family and I’ve tried doing activities to make connections but it’s not easy to make close friends.. if you wanna message feel free

Title	FOMO on dating this summer triggering negative emotions
Author	SignificantCap8064
Upvotes	52
Comments	6
Date	May 27, 2021 6:44 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askFDS
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/AskFDS/comments/nmeep0/fomo_on_dating_this_summer_triggering_negative/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askFDS/fomo-on-dating-this-summer-triggering-negative.791862 https://theredarchive.com/post/791862

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