Abundance mentality?

rocknrollchuck · 2020-11-14T14:26:25+00:00

I guess my question is this: How... as a married man do I get myself into an abundance mentality when abundance is not there?

You build yourself into a man who naturally has abundance because he's attractive.

get what you want so you’re just gonna leave?” And then says see you only want me for sex if I withdraw attention after being rejected

Read this.

After 14+ years of being in her frame and a total blue pill Beta how do I bring her into my frame.

You don't. You build a strong frame that she can enter willingly. Frame is knowing who you are and what you want.

RedPillGlasses · 2020-11-14T15:23:01+00:00

As others have said, 12 Levels of Dread is literally the textbook on how to fix sexless marriage, with the advantage of getting OUT of the sexless marriage if need be.

Also find the article on the 1000 foot rope. Basically you’ve been a loser for 14 years, she’s not going to come joyously bouncing back after 3-4 months.

Eventually, the 1000 foot rope will yank tight and she’ll come along for the ride. Or she cuts the rope and you have to decide to divorce her or not.

Honestly? Like 90% of the time we’ve seen this, the wife wants to come along. AS LONG AS, you don’t really care if she comes or not. That’s the part you can’t fake.

2wo2wo3hree · 2020-11-14T16:50:12+00:00

I have tried the initiate and if you get rejected just go to the gym or do something else.. But she catches on to that... “you don’t get what you want so you’re just gonna leave?”

Ok. And? When you go to a restaurant and they say “We are not going to serve you. We don’t want you to come inside.” Do you just stay there and profess how much you like their food? Do you just stand there because maybe they’ll feed you? No. You go somewhere else where your time is better invested.

man_in_the_world · 2020-11-14T19:27:29+00:00

Abundance is having more (desirable) options readily available than you have capacity or time to take advantage of:

an overflowing buffet at a restaurant
a long list of movies you want to watch on Netflix
standing invitations from five beloved friends in exotic locations across the world to stay with them for your next vacation
ten different hobbies you wish you had more time for.

If you refuse to allow yourself sexual abundance, "activity abundance:" is still available to you. Sex is a fun and rewarding activity, but so are rock climbing, football, lifting weights, getting together with friends, remodeling a room in your home, working on a mission, meeting new people at a local bar... sex with my wife has to compete with other desirable uses of my limited time, and doesn't always (or even usually) win.

Do you know what else has to compete for my limited time and attention? Nonsexual activities with my wife. I have an abundance of better things to do than chase after or orbit around a sexually uninterested wife ... so I might invite her to do one of them instead ... and because they're also really rewarding things to do, I'm not much bothered by a sexual rejection. I mean, more often than not I choose some other activity over initiating sex anyway, so why be bothered if she sometimes does too?

BTW, activity abundance underlays "withdrawing time and attention from an unreceptive wife" ... not passive-aggressive punishment, covert contracts, or some retarded idea of beta dread, as most of our newbie beta retards seem to think.

skuttt · 2020-11-14T18:31:23+00:00

Abundance is knowing you can get other women. You don’t have to act on it. You’ll level up and she will notice. Once she also sees other women want you, you’re set.

innominating · 2020-11-14T14:45:48+00:00

You say you’ve been reading the sidebar. What have you read exactly?

“You only want me for sex” is a shittest.

Say, “that’s not true, I want blow jobs too.” And smile and laugh. If she gets pissed double down, and say, “full nude massages are cool, and I like your cooking.” Or, whatever.

The point is you have to get to a place where you have no shame for being a man who likes to fuck. She needs to know you are a man who likes to fuck. And, if she doesn’t fuck you, you just might not be able to control yourself...

All this being said, go slow. If you haven’t yet, search 12 levels of dread on TRP and follow that. It will take months to become attractive and get your wife in the habit of fucking ever other day.

So when she doesn’t fuck you, and you leave - it is fine if she recognizes that you are removing attention when you are too busy to hang out with her when she is sexually unavailable. Just don’t be overt about it, and never admit it. You can’t be butthurt because she is unavailable, but you can be too busy to hang with a sexually unavailable woman. The idea is she doesn’t fuck you, then you chill for a few minutes, finish what you were doing, and then say hey I’m bored I’m going to run out with the boys, or to the gym, or to the coffee shop, or wherever. Then come home 1-3 hours later and jump in the shower.

To answer your question, you don’t have to cheat on your wife, but you have to game other women, and get to the place where your wife thinks you could close, or your wife will never feel dread.

Lastly if you only fuck every 2-3 weeks how many times do you masterbate in between? Stop doing her job for her and you might be surprised, after a while you’ll act a little more aggressive, which she will be attracted to, and you’ll fuck more.

Sepean · 2020-11-14T14:24:07+00:00

I guess my question is this: How... as a married man do I get myself into an abundance mentality when abundance is not there? I don’t want to cheat on my wife.

I don’t want to cheat on my wife either. That doesn’t stop me from talking to other people, and experiencing how easy it is to turn girls is enough for most.

I have tried the initiate and if you get rejected just go to the gym or do something else.. But she catches on to that... “you don’t get what you want so you’re just gonna leave?” And then says see you only want me for sex if I withdraw attention after being rejected

What is the problem here? Do you want to do MRP, but only if you can keep everyting concealed from your wife? Rofl.

Are you interested in your wife if she is not a sweet, submissive, horny girl?

Second question. After 14+ years of being in her frame and a total blue pill Beta how do I bring her into my frame. I find this extremely difficult.. my wife has pretty bad anxiety and this triggers a need to try and control pretty much everything. How do I pull her out of this? Any articles on frame or books that best present this?

The sidebar has some good books on it...

sea-tease · 2020-11-15T14:49:45+00:00

Your question looks nearly exactly what mine would have looked like nearly two years ago - including the "religious" baggage. You have been given some great feedback. The things I know now and the way I operate could not have been put into words and simple answers, because how I operate now is a result of doing the work.

I like what /u/rocknrollchuck said "You build yourself into a man who naturally has abundance because he is attractive. He's right and it takes action. Sustained action.

You came across this information a year ago and you are in the same space except you seem to have made it through the anger stage but now you are just conceptualizing information without action. The answer to your questions require knowledge AND action.

The answers are always the same. Read until your eyes bleed - every book on the sidebar, I read all of MRP my phone could access. (I read RPChristians too because of some of my "religious" baggage, that sub was somewhat helpful. It may or not be for you - that's your call) Lift, like you say are say are or heavier if you are bullshitting. And for me, I would have never grown without OYSing every week. I made it a point to do that for one full year and I found a lot of blind spots I would have never seen. It's important to do this work until you are no longer doing it for her, but for you. You are not there, I can tell by your post. OYSing forced me to take action and put into practice what I was reading. Without doing that, my ego would have lied to me all along and I would have continued to spin on the Dancing Monkey Hamster Wheel. Which is what you are doing. Get to work on those things, that is what creates abundance.

EveryGodDamnDay · 2020-11-14T19:12:20+00:00

Before your frame is big enough for two, it has to be big enough for one. Is your frame strong enough to support you? Are you doing what you want because you want it? If not, if your frame won't even support you, then it's a waste of time trying to pull anyone else into it.

bob--man · 2020-11-14T19:33:26+00:00

l stumbled on TRP last December when I was trying to figure out why my wife wouldn’t have sex with me no matter what I tried.

Lots of talk about TRP in your post, but no mention of any MRP sidebar books, posts, links, or even, the 60 Days of Dread. Stop hanging out at TRP and focus on going through the MRP sidebar. There is a lot of fucked up information that is thrown around at TRP, all of which is pedestalizing pussy, whining about women, and no mention of taking responsibility for your life.

How... as a married man do I get myself into an abundance mentality when abundance is not there? I don’t want to cheat on my wife.

Abundance mentality comes from becoming a high-value man that takes ownership of his life. You are the CEO of you. Your life. The responsibility then comes from becoming attractive in all areas of your life, which includes lifting heavy, developing frame, building a strong mental model (mental point of origin), becoming a social animal, living the life that you want to live, and doing things because you want to do them - not for anyone else. If you were following the MRP sidebar for this past year, you would have already come across the 60 Days of Dread posts, which is your roadmap for becoming an attractive, high-value man. When you become an attractive man, you are attractive to everyone and everything around you; not just your wife...

ArgentinaMRP · 2020-11-14T19:41:54+00:00

Can you pull other women? Seriously, can you? Do other women want fuck you? That's where abundance comes from. Are you attractive enough that other women want to have sex with you and be with you. Based on the info provided, you aren't doing any day game or getting any numbers. Start there. If you are as attractive as you say you are, you should have no issue gaming other women. This will give you something to look at from an objective level. Start gaming other women, get some numbers, play a little text game, and see whether or not other women are into you.

LazerSpin · 2020-11-15T02:00:23+00:00

Like ofhers have said: in MTRP abundance does not mean having many other sex partners. It means having other options to spend your time. Hobbies, gym, work, spendting time with kids, whatever. Also why is leaving after getting rejected a problem? Lmao just leave and go do something you like or something that needs to be done around the house.

Is your house spotless and comfy btw? Or is it the usual american heap of a cluttered garage, tons of junk, dust, dirty carpets, and a toilet with a slow flush system leak?

business---travel · 2020-11-14T19:26:16+00:00

Have been going through the majority of the TRP sidebar over the last year

TRP sidebar, or MRP sidebar? There is a massive difference between both sidebars...

Have you not been going through the 60 DoD!? You will find all of your answers there.

wkndatbernardus · 2020-11-15T04:47:43+00:00

I find it interesting that no one ever talks about controlling your sexual urges as a path to ngaf about sexual rejection. I believe this is a good way to project OI when faced with a wife that refuses to do her wifely duty. Yes, you should go do other things if rejected but, it's much easier to not appear butthurt if you could take or leave sex.

The ancient Greeks believed appetites like sexuality needed to be brought to heel lest they control or enslave us. Only when you become their master can true virtue take root in your soul. This is what is truly attractive.

[deleted] · 2020-11-14T14:35:48+00:00

Are you mentally ready to walk out? Own what you want unapologetically. It sounds like you have no game. Are you taking the oldest teenager in the house a bit too seriously?

finallysomeservice · 2020-11-14T22:35:52+00:00

What keeps you with her ?

Physical-Connection5 · 2021-01-10T19:22:04+00:00

But she catches on to that... “you don’t get what you want so you’re just gonna leave?” And then says see you only want me for sex if I withdraw attention after being rejected

Have you ever had the balls to say "Uh, yeah!" after she says these things? You aren't supposed to do these things to trick her; you're supposed to do them so you can improve yourself, and your mindset. Plus, train her.

Title	Abundance mentality?
Author	finallysomeservice
Upvotes	26
Comments	30
Date	November 14, 2020 1:55 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/ju2a8a/abundance_mentality/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/abundance-mentality.733469 https://theredarchive.com/post/733469

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