Feminine men

_the_golden_rule_ · 2019-01-29T13:14:40+00:00

I admit that I used to be "feminine" in a lot of ways. In my experience, I attracted women that had some form of a mental illness and sought emotional comfort and security (which feminine men provide in spades). They were all average in looks, young, had insatiable sex drives, and very low self-esteem. That's kind of a rare extreme, though.

More commonly I think some women know their SMV is too low to lock commitment with top men, so they kind of settle for feminine, inoffensive men. I think all of these relationships start well, but most of them turn into dead bedrooms once the kids come around. Betabux at that point.

shady_nasty_mf · 2019-01-29T13:08:16+00:00

Ex-feminine man here raised by a narcissistic feminist single mom. The only reason I broke free of her influence is that a severe mental illness weakened manipulative abilities in my early teens. If it wasn't for that, I'd be another dutiful beta getting pegged by his feminist girlfriend.

Personally, a lot of bisexual and "lesbian" women came at me back then because I had enough feminine energy that they got from being with other girls with the added bonus of a warm penis.
I also attracted a lot of dominant straight women. Basically the dynamic would be reversed, they'd control the interaction and frame and I would always follow. Their attraction to me wasn't arousal, it was about ego satisfaction.
The last set came at me because I was the opposite of some male figure(s) in their life that they hated; a masculine father, or being dumped by a long line of alphas. They resent these men and everything about them, including their masculinity and seek a man with little to no masculinity.

0io- · 2019-01-29T13:38:32+00:00

I've seen some solid "pretty boy" game. A lot of artist/musician/rock star type guys can pull it off. Usually RP focuses more on the "jock" or athletic guys, because that's probably the easiest thing to do. But there are skinny / druggy guys who are art majors and look totally emo and thin bodies that can still get massively laid. Girls still react to that kind of alpha where the guy doesn't give a fuck about society's rules and seems to be very into himself. You see models hanging out with artist types a lot, where you would have thought the guy was gay if he wasn't fucking that hot model... be a successful enough artist or musician and you can run around wearing lipstick and make-up and nail polish and still have hot girls wanting to fuck you... they're not beta-bux. Just a different kind of alpha. Look at the old punk rockers and heavy metal guys, long hair, makeup, crazy outfits. Breaking all the rules.

AloofusMaximus · 2019-01-29T13:52:29+00:00

A lot of people completely misunderstand the "duel mating strategy", it's not either/or, it's both. Women ARE attracted to both bad boys, and providers. Their version of a unicorn is a man that's both, think beauty and the beast (alpha, but tame TO her).

The problem is that with provider only tendencies (beta traits) they get horribly bored. Those men aren't fun, challenging, or exciting. Often they'll stick around (at least for a while) because they don't want to take a lifestyle hit. And of course we all know she's probably having her fun on the side, while tossing the hubby wife sex once a month.

Women DO date their orbiters, because most women absolutely can't stand to be alone. It's actually almost a predictible cycle... Single, attached, bored, repeat. Her being attached can last anywhere from weeks to years.

With the kind of guys you're describing, it's not a matter if if, but when.

The other thing is that the masculine/feminine parts of a personality are aggregates of other traits (depending on how you view personality). Like high compassion/empathy is typically feminine, while low is masculine. People in general are far from ubiquitous, and there's a LOT of variation (masculine women, feminine men etc).

UnbreakableFrame · 2019-01-29T16:56:05+00:00

There are a lot of good answers here, but there is an elephant in the room that needs to be addressed. TRP does not describe 100% of people, be it women or men, or 100% of potentially successful relationship dynamics. It just describes the average. TRP is not about making every woman like you, it's about making yourself attractive to the majority. There are plenty of relationships with feminine men and masculine women that work just fine, it's just not what most women want and that's the key. Society tells us that this is perfectly fine each and every time, when in reality the vast majority of women want to submit to dominant men.

Izakthegreat23 · 2019-01-29T12:55:26+00:00

Beta bucks

Nightwingx7 · 2019-01-29T13:02:23+00:00

welcome to america, where being a feminine man is seen as positive and the recommended path whereas following red pill ideology gets you quarantined and brigaded by feminists lol.

BluePillEltonJohn · 2019-01-29T12:59:47+00:00

It’s easier to control feminine men, also there is no way for u to know if “their sexual lives SEEM to be on point”

SwoleyMoleyFrijoley · 2019-01-29T14:07:44+00:00

Feminine men are putty to be molded into her disposable emotional tampon and occasional dildo

FrgElder · 2019-01-29T15:27:39+00:00

Some women who are jaded from past relationships, or who are manipulative by nature, enjoy having weak/feminine men as partners because they are easier to control and dominate. These women usually have been pumped and dumped many times in the past and now seek the control over a relationship that they previously could never possess.

They are not attracted to their partners, it is all about controlling the power dynamic. These are the women who are almost certainly guaranteed to cheat habitually and get away with it. Many relationships these days are like this, as relationships and marriages have very very little incentive for a masculine/dominant man; who can all the perks of a relationship from women without any of the commitment on his part. Feminine men jump into relationships because they feel they need to, and because they feel comfortable being controlled/dominated, because then they don't have to think or act for themselves.

Vikingcel · 2019-01-29T16:32:08+00:00

Their looks compensate enough for their lack of masculine behavior.

MGRaiden97 · 2019-01-29T13:54:31+00:00

Dominant women with feminine men usually doesn't work in the long run and will usually end with the woman being unhappy. There needs to be a push and pull in dominance in relationships and with one side being completely submissive, it won't last

Psychological_Radish · 2019-01-29T17:48:38+00:00

I see a lot of feminine guys in relationships with women and they both seem satisfied.

That's the front that they put on in public. You have no idea what is going on behind the scenes. They could be fighting constantly. There could be cheating. They probably aren't having sex often or passionately.

Men aren't privy to the conversations that women have with each other in private. From what I have heard third-hand over the years, the vast majority of married women wish they could leave their husbands. Oftentimes they won't follow through for religious, family, or financial reasons, and the poor sap has no idea that his wife seriously weighed leaving him.

GL_QUAD · 2019-01-29T19:02:26+00:00

What's your opinion about women who go after feminine men . How do the dynamics work here

I suspect such dynamics might involve a strap-on dildo.

Hmmm. Some time ago, some wise guy mentioned his disgusts of seeing men who are "unable to defend anything." Interesting...

Yet I see a lot of feminine guys in relationships with women

Pretty boy types? Where their attractiveness, facial symmetry and low body-fat somewhat offsets their unattractive behavior?

Also, as already mentioned in the thread, artists? Artists tend not to be boring - for your average 20yo woman, the artist might do with merely embodying some pretentious cliche; the older the woman, the more genuine and/or adventurous the artist (but then, we're no longer in the submissive territory...)

SirAttackHelicopter · 2019-01-29T20:42:23+00:00

There is a scientific explanation of this phenomenon: Jordan Petersen said that the birthcontrol usage spike allowed for women to chase after men who aren't of the primitive desire traits, such as a wide chin as an example of a manly man. When women undergo the ovulation phase, studies have found a direct relation between attractiveness to the stereotypical manly man, and when 'normal' an attractiveness to the feminine man.

So one can theorize that birth control has an effect on more women choosing feminine men. This data is also relatively new considering we are now seeing more than 1 generation of birth control users and how have a better sample data source.

reddit309 · 2019-01-30T00:57:31+00:00

Being nice, kind, relationship material, and shy do not necessarily indicate that a guy isn't masculine. Someone can be very confident in himself and have a great pursuit of excellence and still be nice kind loving in a relationship and doesn't speak very much when in public. I'm not sure what you mean by emotional and "submissive" but a masculine guy can certainly show emotion in an intimate relationship.

Being masculine isn't about being a dick and not being relationship material. It is my opinion that you do not understand the meaning of masculinity and femininity.

This is why I think TRP is dangerous, it makes you think you shouldn't be nice and respectful. Being a "nice guy"/pushover is unattractive but there's a big difference between that and being nice and respectful.

RedPillDayNightmare · 2019-01-30T02:11:05+00:00

Admittedly I was in a feminine frame most days when i was with my ex, cheating on her with as much females as i could too so not focusing on improving myself, bad relationships with males, still going bk for advice frm mother at 20 (embarrassing/terrible)..... she was sweet/fiesty average looks, even kind of red pilled, but when she went from jobless to working in law, i felt the power dynamics changing something inside of me said this aint right (b4 my redpill knowledge), i was stuck working in shitty retail, she started picking skinny jeans for me at the store, even the estrogen faced male sales assistant was humoured by what was goin on, trying to dress me like a mannequin. Long story short i dumped the girl and my job. I thought im not gettin cucked before i even heard of the word cuck.

SorryBelt · 2019-01-30T08:55:49+00:00

Don’t worry about them

thesquarerootof1 · 2019-01-29T17:17:44+00:00

First thing I think of are Asian girls. It seems that about half of them like the kpop boyband types that care a lot about fashion but can not grow any facial hair for the life of them. Then the other half like really masculine white men. It’s weird really... I don’t see how any women would like a feminine kpop boyband type...

Title	Feminine men
Author	modimian
Upvotes	27
Comments	69
Date	January 29, 2019 12:48 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/akzom9/feminine_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/feminine-men.210403 https://theredarchive.com/post/210403

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