Whats the most appropriate response to "cheating"?

CopperFox3c · 2015-09-24T16:08:10+00:00

If you agreed to exclusivity, then the response is hard next. Radio silence.

As a man, you gave her the most valuable thing you have - time and commitment. And she treated it like it was worthless. You owe her nothing at that point.

Archwinger · 2015-09-24T16:07:37+00:00

No contact.

Don't respond to her, or if you do respond, respond with "k" (in text form) or "okay" (if you're talking in person). Then just don't contact her again.

Hit the gym, go meet and fuck other women. Don't give the cheater closure, don't have a conversation about it, don't share your feelings, don't get mad or butt-hurt, don't try to save the relationship. Just ignore her confession or respond in a token manner indicating receipt of the communication, and go no contact.

If a third party you care about asks you about her, just mention that things didn't work out. If a third party you don't care about asks you about her, ignore them. You're too busy to wallow around about this or talk about it. You're at the gym, you're succeeding professionally, you're learning new shit, you're meeting new people, and you're fucking other women. You're too busy to spend any more time or energy on anything to do with this girl.

94redstealth · 2015-09-24T19:02:48+00:00

i ended my marriage the day I found out

redpillcynic · 2015-09-24T19:43:25+00:00

Machiavellian answer: pretend to not notice or care, downgrade to plate.

Stop caring about her, she's dead to u from now . From now on she's only used for sex. Sleep with other girls, when she finds out deliver nuke from orbit: we were done the moment you cheated blah blah, leave her

throw_em_all · 2015-09-24T19:21:27+00:00

Cut all contact, erase all feelings (positive and negative) about her, she's just another random person from now on, and resume your life.

This is my reasoning:

If you go positive and "forgive" her, you're actually doing her a favor, you're giving her the chance to rationalize her way out of guilt, fuck that, let that bitch deal with the remorse.
If you go negative and express your hatred, then she rationalizes her way out of the guilt, by you being an inconsiderate asshole who's not able to forgive, and the classic line "even when she confessed" basic reframe of the situation, now she's the victim and you're the asshole.

Accept that what happened happened and forgiving her/making things up is just giving away your dignity, while hating her and spend one more minute thinking about her is just wasting precious time of your own lifespan on something that won't change and won't be undone, best course of action is acceptance and self improvement, your mission should be to regain that lost value working towards an even better life.

SkorchZang · 2015-09-24T23:01:24+00:00

Key thing to understand is that, the less said the better. I always wrote every single woman long winded noble emails about how I forgive her, and see her point of view, and how our times together really added to my life experience in a positive way.

Thanks to one girl, I found out exactly what they do with those emails. They read the best parts in bed with their new fucker, and laugh their asses off at your expense. I needed that lesson, it was like a fucking compulsion to "say my part" and "have closure". All of it stems direct from blue pill indoctrination, only seems natural because we're steeped in it all of the time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0C1jj6I0eJA

"Walk, walk like a man my son"

fnordsnord · 2015-09-24T17:02:24+00:00

He went to cinema

dandar4600 · 2015-09-24T16:22:23+00:00

how do you get the hell out with your dignity in your satchel?

You next her and cut any contact.

If some contact is requred due to kids, work, business etc then only discuss that and move on. If after some time she wants to be your fwb you can OPENLY plate her (she knows you're not exclusive, she can be but you are not) but never upgrade her to LTR again. She will cry, complain and make you into an asshole that's punishing her like this post so best bet is to cut contact entirely.

BPtoRP · 2015-09-24T23:30:22+00:00

Smirk and leave, radio silence. Best scene to describe that is in Lucky Number Slevin, could only find the french version of the scene (severely NSFW): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARRZLe8lCYw

VasiliyZaitzev · 2015-09-25T02:19:32+00:00

If a woman admits to cheating on you, do not say another word. Get up and leave (whether in actuality or metaphorically). Do not contact, move on with your life.

If you forgive a cheater, you give her a hunting license.

Title	Whats the most appropriate response to "cheating"?
Author	thatblokefrombelow
Upvotes	6
Comments	33
Date	September 24, 2015 3:55 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3m7noe/whats_the_most_appropriate_response_to_cheating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/whats-the-most-appropriate-response-to-cheating.154262 https://theredarchive.com/post/154262

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