Approach anxiety owns me

BangaiiWatchman · 2022-03-05T21:27:25+00:00

So I would suggest first trying to approach girls who maybe you aren’t as attracted too? Like I know we all see the smoking hot 10 and want her but maybe go for a 4 or 5 at first just to get comfy with it if that helps. This is what I’m trying to do.

In other words, you should try fishing for Sunny’s in a pond before you go fishing for tuna in the ocean.

dryempire · 2022-03-05T21:36:25+00:00

phenibut

NoGuard4277 · 2022-03-05T23:59:23+00:00

There is no trick or secret. Force yourself to move. If not rejection, then what do you fear? If your problem is talking yourself out of approaching, then talk yourself into approaching.

According_Praline_16 · 2022-03-06T18:22:32+00:00

Feel like they don't matter to you.. and you can talk to them with ease... if you really feel that the end result will be rejection anyway...say what you want....just build your confidence....by intentionally talking to any woman and saying what you feel and even include conversation that may shock them....or disgust them....after a few times you will find what is acceptable and what is not....just try and you will succeed.....my father always said if you never ask how will you know!?

You have to try and try again NO man is just a natural...EVEN IF YOU SEE A GUY WHO IS A SWEET TALKER HE LEARNED FROM PRACTICE....REMEMBER THAT!

PaleontologistNo2785 · 2022-03-05T22:45:31+00:00

Do uhave wings that can push u?

Alive-Doughnut2345 · 2022-03-06T03:24:35+00:00

There is absolutely no answer or trick to this. You either do it or you don’t. That’s the hard lesson I’ve learned. And yes, most often you will get rejected sometimes harshly and you’ll have to take the next few minutes or even hours to walk it off and get over it.

This is just it this is the reality the sooner you accept it the stronger you will feel and then maybe the anxiety will not have as strong of a hold on you

roccenz · 2022-03-06T10:38:10+00:00

Exposure therapy will fix this. Go make your first approach, after your 100 approches this will feel like nothing. Just do it.

Sentilam · 2022-03-06T17:06:54+00:00

My best advice in approaching women is when you’re about to do it, those 3 first seconds, don’t think just go and say Hi. Once you’re there it’s way easier than you thought.

When you start delaying is when all the excuses start to pop and anxiety hits. My best example is when taking a cold shower, just get in without thinking about it.

Candy-Cane69 · 2022-03-06T18:07:17+00:00

honestly from my experience the more you think about it the more the anxiety builds , we've all done it before , you see a girl you like the look of and you look to see if she's noticed you hoping you get a significant eye contact to convince yourself she's noticed you and is interested.

but the reality is you need to go approach the moment you get the chance , a second later and your anxiety will take hold , wether you think of something to say on the way or not , just go over and say something !

user009818 · 2022-03-06T18:36:43+00:00

literally just close your brain, TURN IT OFF, walk up to her. Don't even ask yourself what ur gonna say, say something and that's it. I know what you mean, but you have to realize that what you're doing is completely normal . This happens to me a lot where I start questioning myself, but that's the worst thing to do. Literally as soon as u get the thought of wanting to talk to her, do it.

M4rshmall0wMan · 2022-03-06T21:41:23+00:00

I recommend warming up to people of lower difficulty. Older people are the easiest to talk to! Once you’ve warmed up a bit, try talking to a random guy. Then a girl you aren’t particularly attracted to. Then, maybe possibly, a girl you are attracted to! Even if you don’t get the the final step, you’ll feel rewarded that you met someone new. Over time you’ll be able to skip the lower difficulties and start higher.

5_7pickup · 2022-03-05T22:58:21+00:00

Bro you tried approaching for one week. Thats nothing. Just keep going out solo and putting yourself in those environments. Even if you dont approach its good to familiarize yourself in those settings.

Get comfortable with the environment and approach will be easier.

Imagine approaching a girl at a random house party vs at your house party. Youll be far more confident if its at your house cause you’re comfortable with the environment.

ForsakenVE · 2022-03-07T00:32:58+00:00

Hey u/Sentilam u/Candy-Cane69 u/user009818

So I went out today to try again and well, not much changed. I spent around 3 hours walking and just like yesterday I wasn't being able to get my self to approach, but before I gave up I remembered about the advice you guys gave me and did my best to clear my mind and just say the first words. And well I don't know if it worked or if it was something else but I managed to say the words!

I saw this girl walking towards me and I said ''Excuse me, can I tell you something?'' the girl looked somewhere else and kept walking... It was an obvious rejection lmao

I don't know if this counts as an approach since she didn't even reply, but whatever. Compared to yesterday this was much better so I'll take this as a win

Today there wasn't as many girls as yesterday so I didn't even miss as many opportunities either

But this made me think that approaching girls that are walking might not be a good idea?

When I do it this way the girl always keeps walking and I can't talk to them for long, one time the girl stopped for a second then smiled to me and then turned around and kept walking...

Where do you guys go to do day game and what kind of girls do you approach?

epimpstyle · 2022-03-06T23:46:54+00:00

That's why a dating coach exist :-)

You need someone to push you from your back, you can not do this alone (it is possible alone but it is very difficult and the right time for approach never exists, you must create that moment because you are the hunter. a girl will never make the first step).

ConsiderationNo9804 · 2022-03-06T02:04:56+00:00

I would take money, career, house and muscle over taking some rando on a date. It sucks being single at times but settle, find someone who appreciate your worth. I have no problem talking to women or ppl in general, I just suck ass at small talk and I’m adhd like hell so it does not help.

cappinahab · 2022-03-06T09:24:37+00:00

I’ve found progress in therapy, psychedelics, meditation and combat sports. Giving me my confidence back. Still struggle tho I still feel as tho I belowng to approach anxiety as well. Not for long tho

rynldn · 2022-03-06T19:16:02+00:00

So if you don't fear rejection and you don't care what people think, then what's the thoughts or feelings that happen which end up stopping you from approaching?

RoseTinted64 · 2022-03-06T21:23:22+00:00

Stop looking at women as sexual objects and instead approach just to meet them. Also, stop reading/watching material on game. This shit is 90% balls. Granted, the other 10% is where the magic happens. Anyone who says otherwise is either lying or inexperienced. JUST SAY HI

Born-Fox-4004 · 2022-03-09T04:02:48+00:00

I have anxiety that mainly affects phone calls. Only today after over 2 years have I started conquering it. In your soul you have to say to yourself no more waiting. Say out loud “3, 2, 1” then go. For some reason the body takes the 3,2,1 and rolls with it

Title	Approach anxiety owns me
Author	ForsakenVE
Upvotes	12
Comments	37
Date	March 5, 2022 9:00 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/t7ir91/approach_anxiety_owns_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/approach-anxiety-owns-me.1265288 https://theredarchive.com/post/1265288

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