I’m 30 and I’ve never had a girlfriend, my face is very disproportionate and I’m on autism spectrum, could I realistically make myself attractive to women? (Pics included)

seduction-ModTeam · 2022-10-29T05:37:15+00:00

This post/comment has been removed because it violates Rule #5: The topic is too broad, has been covered a lot already, or involves the assumption overly limited by race, age, physical limitations/appearance, and/or other inborn external qualities.

Put in some reading & work before asking questions that have been addressed, like: * How do I approach? * How do I get a number? * How do I talk to girls at college? * How/When do I kiss a girl? * Does this really work?

As for the last one, it is an answered question. There have been many posts on physical limitations over the years, including this one. No need to re-ask it.

zamboflu · 2022-10-29T00:43:13+00:00

Okay first of all, there's nothing wong with your face man. You have a nice smile :D

It's easy to pick on yourself, but I promise you girls don't care about it as much as you think.

If you walk around believing there's something wrong with the way that you look, and that you're unattractive, well that's how women will perceive you. Your belief that you are not attractive will show.

If you walk around believing you are attractive, while just being yourself and being confident in your own skin, well that will be perceived as well.

It's not your body that needs the work man, it's your mind. Work on that confidence!

ManuelIyogunJr · 2022-10-29T00:59:44+00:00

You already drew a conclusion. Change your thinking, change your mindset. It’ll change you.

Senior-Dot387 · 2022-10-29T00:29:31+00:00

Firstly you need to fix how you view yourself. Women don’t care about attractiveness to the same extent that men do, use this to your advantage. Get good at socialising, flirting and exerting confidence. Tbh you’re not even a bad looking dude, add your current confidence level though and you become unattractive.

genghisfaery · 2022-10-29T00:36:19+00:00

There’s nothing wrong with how you look. Find something that you love how you feel while doing it and keep doing it. Do “you” with honesty, abandon and passion. Figure out who you are, what you like, what you don’t like, and try to fill your life with what you do like. People who are happy with themselves are attractive- it has nothing to do with physical features. Even if it did, you look like a dude. Just a regular dude. Be an exceptional dude with what you’ve got going on in your joyous life!

Kriegmannn · 2022-10-29T01:50:19+00:00

Dawg. Get a nice haircut, Go to the gym 4x a week, and you WILL look like a fucking sex machine.

ThrowRA11113 · 2022-10-29T00:22:49+00:00

[permanently deleted]

No-Historian-6391 · 2022-10-29T00:23:03+00:00

Wear a hat

SpookyKG · 2022-10-29T03:02:09+00:00

You're pretty normal looking, you just look a little sad.

You have what it takes to do well.

mh0864 · 2022-10-29T03:05:49+00:00

There is nothing at all wrong with how you look.

makesomerubber · 2022-10-29T04:20:08+00:00

Look man I’m not going to lie, you are a decent looking fellow with infinite potential to make a woman very happy.

Just work on your confidence, keep that inner voice positive and keep those inner demons that tell you the wrong things that don’t help at bay. Plenty of help out there on the internet on how to work on confidence. You got to put the effort in and believe in the process though.

And yes you have a big forehead. I see this as an opportunity to come up with brilliant forehead jokes to make her laugh and show her you aren’t bothered at all so neither should she be.

‘I wish I could have picked you up on my motorcycle, except I don’t have one because I could never find a helmet that fits :p’

Future-self · 2022-10-29T02:39:13+00:00

You’ve posted this same type of thing at least once before.

Why aren’t you satisfied with the answers you got in your previous posts?

Category-Top · 2022-10-29T01:31:15+00:00

Hey there,

You’re fine! You might want to talk to someone about body dysmorphia. Being anywhere on the spectrum can make socializing hard or awkward, but there are hella cute girls who are on the spectrum, and others who are into neurodiverse guys.

Set some social goals: have casual conversations with people on the street—anyone! Build up a skill of acting outgoing and explore what you like.

Everyone is lonely, and everyone is hoping to find a family of friends/partners. The pandemic just made it harder for everyone. But the opportunities are out there: MeetUps, volunteer organizations, faith communities, learning communities. And practice just makes us better

KrimsonPepe · 2022-10-29T01:37:30+00:00

You aren't even that bad, I'd put you at average and most girls see men as medium ugly anyway. Work out and that face won't matter at all, get money and work out and you'll be slammin em left and right. Your problem is a lack of confidence, stop being a pussy.

Baron_Semedi_ · 2022-10-29T02:08:10+00:00

My honest opinion is that you are not ugly, and if I thought you are i wouldn't even comment because i wouldn't know what advice to give. You have a nice smile. I think getting a personal stylist could help you a lot. The real challenge is the autism, so much about attraction is having good social skills being able to banter and be charming. It won't be easy, it's hard for plenty of guys out there that are even considered handsome, but I don't think you're a lost cause. I see hope. Especially since you haven't succumbed to being an incel.

upfnothing · 2022-10-29T02:16:30+00:00

This dude! Bruh. You have all the physical traits to smash a healthy amount of women. Stop trashing yourself. You have to unconditionally love yourself. Women are attracted to men who are secure and confident in themselves. How can they feel truly loved and respected by someone who doesn’t love and respect himself? The rest is technicals. Seal landed Heidi Klum and he is not winning any awards for good looks. You have to step up. Stop making excuses.

LimpResponsibility55 · 2022-10-29T02:46:36+00:00

bro you look fine

mclaradon · 2022-10-29T02:47:46+00:00

You're being much too hard on yourself and you are definitely not ugly. Some advice from an older woman: Women are attracted to men who are at ease with themselves and who have done a bit of work on getting out and living life. Concentrate on developing your interests, getting a job that will keep you solvent and looking after the basics of grooming & dressing well.

I know you're probably thinking you'll never meet someone BUT YOU WILL. Good luck and enjoy it.

neversleeps212 · 2022-10-29T02:57:55+00:00

Some things that might help you. First, take a total break from social media and porn. If you don’t have an active social or dating life, and you’re consuming a lot of porn and IG models then of course you’re going to feel unattractive in comparison to the people there when in reality most people in the real world don’t hit that level of attractiveness. Second, a break from porn (and masturbation) will help you find more plain looking women attractive.

Finally learn to cultivate the eyes you want to be seen with. And what I mean by that, is you obviously want a women who will see more than just your physical appearance when she looks at you right? But do you look at women that way? Do you truly find kindness, loyalty, intelligence, attractive even if the person possessing those qualities is kind of plain looking? Because that’s what you’re asking of the women you encounter.

iambasicgirl · 2022-10-29T03:18:11+00:00

I can tell by your comments and replies that you are a chill dude. Trust me, you are not ugly! Just because your thoughts and head tell you something, does not mean it’s true. You have it a lot better than a lot of people.

First things first, change those negative Self defeating thought patterns. Then challenge yourself to make a friend. Get coffee, go for walk and learn about someone new. Keep taking care of yourself and correcting those negative thought patterns. You can and will build yourself up and over time confidence will grow.

MindlessAd63 · 2022-10-29T03:40:13+00:00

I’m a stranger on an app who has no interest in making you feel better or worse about yourself. My opinion is that your looks are fine. If you can have a more positive attitude and look happier, you should not have a problem attracting an average or even some above average looking women. You’re one of those guys whose personality and attitude tip the scale. If you’re positive, women will be into you. If you’re negative, they won’t be.

JesusandtheGym · 2022-10-29T03:50:00+00:00

You like fine it’s definitely mental for you

Brutal-Black · 2022-10-29T04:02:39+00:00

Build big muscles, cologne, haircut, casual dress clothes, grow a beard, perhaps a hair transplant to restore hairline

kawaiileftshark · 2022-10-29T04:04:15+00:00

In my opinion, you are not ugly. You do suffer from body dysmorphia. Yes your forehead is disproportionately big. Aside from that, your features are above average. I can be more specific on your positive features if you like. I would be happy to argue with you.

Keep your beard, and get your eyebrows trimmed/shaped. You would be surprised by what that does.

Also consider getting a good toupee to balance your facial features.

Also, you may asexually or aromatic.

I am considered conventionally attractive and I am in the same boat as you. Relationships are simple the very last thing on my long list of things.

Robofrogg1 · 2022-10-29T04:27:57+00:00

Alright dude, you're no Jason Momoa but you're not ugly either. Dress and groom well, stand tall, smile with confidence and you'll be just fine. Listen to what the others here are saying.

hotsoupjeesh · 2022-10-29T04:47:37+00:00

You’re not ugly. You probably do have body dysmorphia syndrome. You keep fixating on that you posted on the other sub and “confirmed that you’re indeed ugly” but you posted here and I can “confirm you’re not ugly”. I understand you lack confidence so you need someone to tell you it. Anyways, that being said, average looking guys will have a hard time getting good looking girls if you lack confidence. There’s ways to build up your confidence. This includes things such as working out, and take classes that might improve your confidence such as improv classes, acting classes, martial arts, and etc. I think getting a personal trainer and working out should be your priority. Getting a new wardrobe will also help a lot with your own confidence and your general appearance. I think you also look better without the facial hair actually. Lastly, some real world advice is you can also go to a cosmetic clinic and change up some things you don’t like. There’s even non surgical options. Like a nose filler would help a lot to smoothen out that area between your forehead and nose, and if you’re unhappy with your chin, fillers can fix that too. Also smile more cuz you got a nice smile. And also get a therapist to help you dive into your insecurities.

ponoloa · 2022-10-29T01:25:48+00:00

Go bald, go jim, smile (:

best_comment- · 2022-10-29T02:32:53+00:00

I applaud you for reaching out, OP! A few words of advice. Take it as you will. First, don't be so hard on yourself. You are attractive, have a great smile. It's genuine. Second, it's not necessary in life to follow the crowd. You be you.

As far as the things you mentioned..I cannot see anything wrong with your face. Start with a good haircut. I would suggest visiting a well known fancy salons in your area. Tell them you are considering changing up your look and ask them their opinion. Work with them from here on something you might like. I would personally choose a younger female since she knows what the current looks are.

Start looking at men's wardrobe and different styles by visiting Pinterest or Instagram. I'd suggest finding a few styles you like, and replicate those looks according to your budget.

To meet women, start with looking around to see if there is a meetup group on a few of your hobbies. Start going to those. Do you like animals? Can you volunteer at a shelter or zoo near you? If you like books, go visit the local bookstore or coffee shop.

Intelligent_Badger96 · 2022-10-29T00:55:06+00:00

Looks fade but being a good person and having love in your heart don't. Some women might think you're ugly but I'm sure there's plenty that will think you're attractive. Don't put yourself down. The gym is a great confidence booster.

Archyblackcat · 2022-10-29T01:26:28+00:00

You are ugly bro, honestly it’s gonna be hard for a girl to find you handsome.. best thing you can do is go to the gym and get muscular, get a better hair cut but that’s about it .. plastic surgery maybe ?? Other than that, don’t expect to pull hot girls by the way you look cause you’re honestly not very good looking.. that’s just the truth, so either find an ugly girl or make tons of money to get a gold digger.. the truth is , most people aren’t lucky enough to be good looking and well , we need to just take whatever we can get with what we have to offer…. Or just keep hitting on good looking women until you find the outlier that will find you attractive..

Weareoneunit · 2022-10-29T01:13:49+00:00

Yeah I remember you!!! Hello you posted in r/ dating advice or in here before about the same thing nice to see you again. Yes you can make your self attractive just need confidence

jmugs668 · 2022-10-29T02:17:55+00:00

Just look at owen cook, traditionally unattractive, has aspbergers, and also happened to be one of the best at cold approach back when he was doing it.

boxinsideme · 2022-10-29T02:33:28+00:00

Hey brother, I can totally relate to you on the weak chin bit. My chin looks very similar to yours and I also don't like going clean shaven because of that, so in a way I do think that you are better suited for a beard. I think you could let the beard grow out a little more as well as grow the hair out some more because there are probably more styles out there that could work for you too.

You're not ugly, either. In fact, I know that you could be attractive to women because you have a few qualities about you that a lot of women find attractive. You look like a very nice person and very caring. You look like you are loyal and you feel very safe and like you would keep your girlfriend safe. For me personally, I find most attractive the dark look you have. I mean like you have a dark personality and that is very attractive to some people.

My question for you is why is it that you are so eager to internalize being called ugly here on Reddit while being so apprehensive when I say that you aren't? Honestly, I wouldn't do this to try to make you feel better. I'm being sincere, because there is also a very unnatractive quality that is dominating all of you pictures and it is the low self image you have of yourself. I can see that and I know a lot of other people can as well. The ugliest part about you isn't even a physical quality and that means that it can absolutely be changed.

I just think it’s common sense that women have standards for how men look and I don’t think I can meet them, I can’t picture a woman thinking I’m physically attractive.

You need to stop believing this. You need to stop repeating the negative affirmations to yourself. I know everyone is telling you this but it's because it's true and you apparently don't know how much of an effect it really has on this. You don't believe that your self image is actually the problem and not your physical features, but it's true. You got to stop knocking yourself down. Why are you completely ignoring your good qualities? You should be focused on those so they dominate the negativity. Stop telling yourself you're on the spectrum. Stop it with the developmental disorder. You are capable of learning some of the social cues that you were never taught or told about when you were a child.

You are 100% physically attractive enough to have a girlfriend that is at least a 6 or a 7. You need to change the attitude because you are depressing to be around like this. And dude, why the fuck are you going to gym if you don't like doing it? Fuck the gym, I've never gone because I hate that place. It gives me a lot of anxiety. Stop wasting time doing things you don't want to be doing for fucks sake. The most. important muscle in your body in the one in that fivehead of yours, so don't neglect it.

bakerboiz22 · 2022-10-29T02:33:28+00:00

Not saying that your bare head looks bad or anything, but, there are people who have heads that don’t “fit” the hat/beanie look. And then there’s folks who look really good wearing beanies/hats. From the look of it, you could rock a beanie! Especially with that beard man. Try some flannel shirts or what you think would be best but I’ve found that wearing different clothes totally changes my appearance. Hit the gym, take care of your mental and psychical health and it will show (to everyone but most importantly yourself)

Lonely-Pikachu · 2022-10-29T04:28:06+00:00

You look alright, maybe a longer beard would fit you better

dub_side · 2022-10-29T04:29:15+00:00

It’s okay man you need to find a way to let these insecurities go. If you start lifting and build some shoulders and traps your look will change. Also smile man

THER0v3r · 2022-10-29T04:55:52+00:00

honestly brother, most women don’t care about HOW you look, only how you present yourself, (besides you look alright, I don’t see the “disproportion” you are talking about), you do need to work on your self esteem though, don’t think too much about “having” a girlfriend, just talk to people, even if it’s awkward at first be polite and socialize with anybody, let go of any stigma you might have and things WILL get better

ChaotixEDM · 2022-10-29T04:59:44+00:00

You're golden dawg, just keep hitting the gym, get some nice fitting clothes and you'll be swatting off the ladies.

GhostKidAstro · 2022-10-29T05:13:14+00:00

Honestly bro, hit the gym hard. Better yet, get a personal trainer. Once you start building muscle, the perception that you have of yourself will change. You’ll look good which in turn will help you feel good.

Boethiah18 · 2022-10-29T05:22:16+00:00

Dude this is the third time iv seen you post this either on here or on another sub. Get over it!!!

garrett786 · 2022-10-29T05:22:51+00:00

Honestly man... drop some acid

gym_brah81 · 2022-10-29T05:28:32+00:00

There's a dating app for people on the spectrum. I'm not saying you have to use it, but figured I'd mention it in the case you find the idea of using it appealing.

https://www.hikiapp.com/

sapper377 · 2022-10-29T05:28:34+00:00

This is like the 5th time I’ve seen this guy post on here and asking the same question! Bro I honestly can’t tell if your trolling people on this subreddit or your are just bored and want attention.

YOUR NOT A BAD LOOKING GUY OKAY?! I HAVE SEEN WORST LOOKING GUYS HAVE GFs AND GET MARRIED.

If your looking for a partner you can start by stop posting on here asking strangers for advice on your appearance. Your going to get your assholes who are going to call you ugly making you think you are actually ugly. Get off the internet

GAS_nator224 · 2022-10-29T05:29:56+00:00

Keep up your head king!

Far_Ad_5350 · 2022-10-29T05:36:31+00:00

You gotta stop talking to yourself like that man. You’re a good looking dude who has great facial hair (which for the record, a lot of men can’t grow) A killer jawline (universally associated with attractiveness) and full eyebrows… I mean girls will do all sorts of tricks to make their eyebrows look more full. Plus you’re obviously extremely intelligent. Go out and join a class, a club, a pickle ball team. Somewhere that forces you to talk and bond with others. I promise you they don’t see your “flaws” the way you see them. Don’t be hard on yourself, go out and make a friend first. Because at the end of the day attractiveness doesn’t mean shit, a pretty face only last so long.

notaproblem333 · 2022-10-29T05:37:36+00:00

You should be serious about the gym, don’t take it casually like most guys do. Do your research on training and diet, and get a personal trainer if possible. Then you’ll have no problems getting women.

There are issues with your face but most women will just ignore them if you have a muscular body. You’re underestimating how much women care about muscles. Don’t listen to what they say, watch what they do. Muscular guys hardly ever stay single.

Title	I’m 30 and I’ve never had a girlfriend, my face is very disproportionate and I’m on autism spectrum, could I realistically make myself attractive to women? (Pics included)
Author	ThrowRA11113
Upvotes	39
Comments	78
Date	October 29, 2022 12:18 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/yg4x64/im_30_and_ive_never_had_a_girlfriend_my_face_is/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/im-30-and-ive-never-had-a-girlfriend-my-face-is.1247525 https://theredarchive.com/post/1247525

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