[deleted by user]

GuaranteeOwn5108 · 2021-12-07T05:11:54+00:00

I hate to say it, but I think you’re the tease here. She was giving you the opportunities but you didn’t take them and that’s ok you’re learning. Remember women are also horny and they want dick… never ask if sex is going to happen and don’t be afraid to make moves.

roakmamba · 2021-12-07T04:20:40+00:00

Did you just friend zoned yourself?

Aureayte · 2021-12-07T03:40:40+00:00

You didnt smash after she literally gave you multiple opportunities and then called her a tease.

On top of that “asked how shed have reacted if i made a move that night” way to call out the elephant in the room without knowing why. You literally didnt make a single move after all those hints

And then she still gives you another chance and you literally call her a tease once more.

Bro?

RPslimjim · 2021-12-07T03:23:13+00:00

You asked her about making a move but you didn’t make a move? She’s losing interest dude. You may have lost your chance.

2021-12-07T07:34:55+00:00

You're all talk and no action. I suspect that deep down you kind of know this. Others made some good points about your passivity the night of, but there's incongruity that oozes through every part of the field report, start to finish. You clearly have a fear of escalation that you're projecting onto her by calling her a tease, or by trying to get her to assume all responsibility for the interaction, or even by titling this post what you have. That way if things go bad you can always just put the blame on her, like when you were trying to win some weird 2 hr frame battle about her inviting you to her place, when all that was required was STFUing, hopping in your car and going over to make good on all your bluster. That might've been your last chance there. She's been more than patient lol. Being incongruent is one of the most unattractive things you can be.

So what's the solve? Dealing with your fear of escalation, rejection, and probably even success. I've been there, too. And I doubt I'm the only one. But now it's time to cut the BS.

willgo-waggins · 2021-12-07T02:59:29+00:00

Dude you actually didn’t call off work and go bang her after a fuckin all-nighter out?!?!

You made your own problem here man!

I don’t know if you can recover from this. I hope for your sake you can but you better step your shit up.

MikeAlphaGolf · 2021-12-07T08:07:59+00:00

If you’ve got a girl alone in your room then there’s a very high chance of banging. Your job is to make it smooth and minimise the awkwardness. Oh it just happened.. that’s the vibe you’re going for. If she says no she says no, you put the cue in the rack and move on with the night.

Texting ad nauseam after a failed date is always a bad idea. You can’t build attraction over text. You can kill it.

Give her a bit of breathing room now. Don’t be the first one to hit her back. She knows you like her or you wouldn’t be acting so awkward. Give her a chance to contact you first.

2021-12-07T01:49:32+00:00

Sorry man, but she saw you chicken out and lost a lot of her attraction to you. Girls date a lot more and are more intuitive at this sort of things, she will judge you based on how confident you are and how physical you are with her. I lost a girl like this once too, a 10/10 for being a pussy, so i know how it feels. After a few years i was a dumbass again, she gave me another shot and i ruined it.

The only way i feel this would work if she gives you another chance, or by luck run into her again, and you make a move fast and bold and full of yourself. Like talking a bit, flirting a bit, and kissing her asap, and even if she is surprised and pulls away a bit you can say something like "sorry, i was a dumbass last time, not gonna let a girl like you slip away " ( after you kiss her, if you can manage that )

Foxrex · 2021-12-07T15:08:34+00:00

An actual Nice Guy. Lol

RobertChardonnay · 2021-12-07T01:11:02+00:00

If you want her, go after her.

2021-12-07T01:29:42+00:00

Only ask her once maybe twice for a date if she doesn't wanna go just stop initiating contact

knightgod1177 · 2021-12-07T11:17:53+00:00

Jesus man, you really gotta ask what the play should’ve been?? You literally answer it yourself in your own post. Losing track of time is a lame ass excuse and you know it. You had the best possible opportunity and blew it royally.

She wasn’t playing hard to get at all. It was you who started playing stupid ass games like you’re trying to be the female in the relationship. All you had to do was make a move. Idk, maybe when she caressed your chest, or held her hand to the back of your neck?? Like for fucks sake, you had it on ez mode and still found a way to fuck it up. I doubt very much she’d want to date someone with the sensibilities of a rock, who can’t get a clue even if it hit him right in the chest, and plays stupid games with her for hours on end instead of making a move.

zx91zx91 · 2021-12-07T05:47:26+00:00

The clock is ticking...

FalconVita · 2021-12-07T15:47:22+00:00

Nigga you played yourself

2021-12-07T09:51:53+00:00

She lost interest because you didn’t even go for the kiss. Don’t feel bad about yourself — it’s a learning experience, but it’s better to go for it and get rejected than to wake up the next day feeling regretful.

vcuriousbetty · 2021-12-07T07:38:52+00:00

The only way you can get back from this is give her space and wait till she comes around.

BetaCuckSimp · 2021-12-07T12:55:29+00:00

You fucked up it’s over RIP

Fluffy_Risk9955 · 2021-12-07T05:58:04+00:00

Mixed signals are the message. Move on.

cyrusol · 2021-12-07T14:14:20+00:00

I figured I had enough and told her she was definitely a good tease but that I just couldn't play any more games for the rest of the day considering I had work tomorrow. This seemed like some sort of test as well, I guess seeing if I was just faking my confidence or how I'd deal with her pulling back.

Sometimes I think "losing a shit test" - if it was one - is the right move. You have a life, you have responsibilities, your time is valuable. If she doesn't want to be considerate of that then fucking next her. Can't have someone in your life who is just a drag. No matter how hot she is.

I really don't understand why the other people ITT react the way they do.

If anything I would now let her approach you and not chase her. Her loss. I'm certain you could get someone else.

brabus4 · 2021-12-07T15:26:49+00:00

You definitely could have played it better. First mistake is not going for the kiss. Second in the chat. Bro she says she is busy, ask her when she's free. If she says she isn't free tell her to let you know when she is.

Legal_Development · 2021-12-07T15:49:19+00:00

You had enough game to talk her into your bedroom or wherever you both went, then you had to fuck it up by not escalating? Lmao! In what world will a girl follow you to a room, caress your chest and hold your neck passionately without no intentions in minds. It's clear she wanted to get fucked but you're to slow to realize. You've blown your chances my guy onto the next one.

GreatScotRace · 2021-12-07T16:47:22+00:00

Ok so a girl was into you and you didn’t make a move nor give her zero indication you were into her romantically / sexually and now you’re accusing her of playing hard to get? You’re the hard to get one playing games, tf

Woujo · 2021-12-07T17:18:34+00:00

However, I decided to just be direct (since I had missed my best shot to make a move) and just told her she was a bit of a tease and asked how she'd have reacted if I made a move that night

This is the worst thing you could have said. You should never make a woman verbalize her sexual feelings. It's embarrassing for them.

And I just said "invite me then".

Another bad move. You need to invite yourself.

We went back and forth with a lot of push-pull and she really played hard to get, but at a certain point (a good 2 hours into this conversation), I figured I had enough and told her she was definitely a good tease but that I just couldn't play any more games for the rest of the day considering I had work tomorrow.

She wasn't "playing hard to get." You were being needy and aggressive and she got freaked out. And sounds like you were a douche on top of that.

What you need to do is stop being needy and stop trying to "talk everything about." Women are emotional creatures; you don't negotiate sex with them. You just let things happen and you don't push her when she's not feeling it. You should be the challenge and make her chase you, not vice versa.

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	69
Comments	45
Date	December 7, 2021 1:05 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/rams6f/deleted_by_user/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1271172 https://theredarchive.com/post/1271172

Comments