Why Women LOVE Jerks

Alex_O7 · 2020-01-24T18:54:50+00:00

More easly women are attracted to confident men, that don't give a fuck (about what others think or do). That's why it is important to not give a fuck.

harryhoudini66 · 2020-01-24T20:18:38+00:00

Great video. Thank you so much. You did an amazing job at explaining things in a clear and concise manner.

If you are familiar with adult attachment theory, you will find that much of the information that is posted in this sub, dating sub, relationship sub and codependency sub, all link back to attachment theory. Each sub just uses different language, coined phrases, buzzwords or framing the same information.

As you said, men that have an avoidant attachment style (jerks) and men that have a secure (successful) attachment style share many of the positive characteristics, attributes and behaviors that in general are attractive to woman. At the same time, they lack many of the negative (unattractive) characteristics, attributes and behaviors that a man with an anxious (nice guy) attachment possess.

When a woman has an anxious attachment style, they are drawn to an avoidant male (again, jerks) big time. These men create in them a strong range of emotions (what this sub calls ups/downs push/pull). These ranges of emotions are familiar and normal to them as a result of a tough or traumatic childhood. When you compare these woman’s attraction to a secure male, it is not at the same level as it is for the avoidant male. In fact, that is when you will hear a girl say “He is perfect in every way but we lacked chemistry or passion”.

When a woman has a secure attachment, they are attracted to avoidant and secure men alike. However, once they identify the negative sides of an avoidant, a secure woman will have no real difficulty disconnecting and moving on. If paired with a secure man, there is a higher chance of the relationship being fulfilling.

Hopefully this all makes sense. It’s very difficult to try to summarize something so complex. I genuinely think that everyone owes it to themselves to research this topic. It will have you view relationship dynamics in a whole different light.

2020-01-24T16:06:40+00:00

Very true. So to the genuinely kind hearted men (not nice guys who fake kindness to get their way) you don't have to become an asshole to get women. Cultivate those traits and you'll be good.

Marvinkmooneyoz · 2020-01-24T20:01:03+00:00

WEll...its that they arent attracted to men with no TACT.....as in, they arent totally obviously scumy, like they dont kick puppies in public, or berate the waiter. But, in truth, women arent really finding men sexy or not based on how genuinely nice or compassionate they are. Their ability to form social connections, yes, and the extent of their social connections. Not saying they NUMBER of connections they have, but a combination of number and with who, and the strength of the relevant connections. So, for example, a man who's employment is in some sort of crime organization, who hangs and socializes mostly with other men from within his organization, and their wives and families, and is well liked and trusted by those in his crime organization, will be found to be sexy.

When called out for their boyfriends or husbands non-obvious negative behavior, woman are most likely going to adamently defend them. On the extreme end of the spectrum, we have woman being more or less ok with their new boyfriends sexually abusing their kids from a previous relationship. Of course im not saying all woman are that extreme, or will date mobsters, but the general principle holds to some degree for almost all females.

Bobandjim12602 · 2020-01-24T18:17:37+00:00

Definitely true. You can be a jerk without being a garbage human being.

SmoothPrimal · 2020-01-25T05:28:03+00:00

Its because of several things:

*Women like confidence. Jerks tend to be confident.

*Women like emotional thrills. Jerks tend to do a lot of push pull where they offend you and then they becomes super nice to get you back. This cycle is harmful but can be addictive.

*Women like men with swag. Jerks are used to negative attention so they learn to get their swag on in order to shield self-esteem and love themselves.

*Jerks tend to be attractive since they learn from a young age that people put up with their shit. Ugly people get shut down quicker than attractive people.

Basically it’s mostly a coincidence that jerks tend to have the alpha characteristics of an attractive. Most jerks need to be attractive to be socially successful who in turn get more chances to get with women, but you don’t need to be a jerk to be attractive.

infininme · 2020-01-24T22:46:27+00:00

Also notice that if you don't live your life based on other people, that you feel better. Women also respond to your well-being and willingness to take risks with who you are.

barbearianbliss · 2020-01-25T02:12:28+00:00

Crushing it!! Thank you for your videos and effort!!

weirdo696969 · 2020-01-24T16:12:46+00:00

Exactly. They will have better luck if they are a bit more attractive physically though

justahappyidiot · 2020-01-24T18:10:38+00:00

That's a lot of very good info in 4 minutes, nicely done!

whirleymon · 2020-01-24T22:16:49+00:00

Post >>>>> video

Play-Mation · 2020-01-25T01:14:45+00:00

This girl I had a thing with dropped me because I was too nice and she “likes assholes”

Wrong-Flamingo · 2020-01-25T01:45:27+00:00

There's also a book, Why Men Love Bitches. It's about along the same lines.

KneedHelpQuicc · 2020-01-25T05:20:37+00:00

This shit makes sense but then I remember I’m not universally attractive so while I do come off like a jerk (never insulting anyone besides the boys in jest) but if you aren’t attractive it’s not a good look

MerdeOnTheDanceFloor · 2020-01-25T00:36:12+00:00

I’m a woman. I’ll more it less agree with this.

I have been told countless times to stop going to for jerks but my prick-o-metre is terrible. Realistically, I go for men who pursue me (self confident) and while they’re not dramatically handsome, they take care of themselves and dress well (well groomed or vain?)

They consistently put their career first, usually hobbies second and me third. Which meant they were successful and engaged in the world around them.

It’s tough. It’s incredibly tough. It also means that sitting in the internet all day is a bad start to dating. Damn.

jusdiffy · 2020-01-24T15:44:48+00:00

I couldn't agree more. Thanks for sharing.

ep1939 · 2020-01-24T22:26:31+00:00

Women don't love jerks they simply trust them more than "nice guys" never exponsing themselves.

TidePodSmoothie · 2020-01-24T23:53:25+00:00

Put it simply, alpha male mentality

Title	Why Women LOVE Jerks
Author	MK2718
Upvotes	129
Comments	29
Date	January 24, 2020 3:41 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/etc1gt/why_women_love_jerks/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-women-love-jerks.1489117 https://theredarchive.com/post/1489117

Comments