"Don't Follow Us, Alright?"

AruSharma04 · 2018-03-09T08:02:53+00:00

So this is something girls are known to do if their friend isn't really very interested. It's perfectly alright man.

Her friends probably figured that you were talking to her even after she turned down the dance, so one of them intervened. Maybe they thought their friend wasn't interested. Just maybe she actually wasn't. Interest can be feigned.

Perhaps you came on too strong. She did turn down the dance, and that's sort of where I would have dropped the idea. A good lesson for the next time.

Rejection is a part of the game. It's a learning each time. Plenty more fish in the sea. Some that aren't as arrogant and rude as to say "don't follow us, ok?" Probably not worth your time, brother. Fuck that shit.

Ps. A better response would've been "Wasn't going to."

Dating973 · 2018-03-09T10:10:02+00:00

I’d say the girl was probably not into you and you overstayed your welcome in that situation. It happens to every single guy so don’t feel bad. Ideally, you’d give a little attention yourself and be the one who walks away. In the future just know that rejection is a normal part of the game and it will help you refocus on other girls

teenwhich · 2018-03-09T09:47:41+00:00

Everyone was there man. Use the experience to build yourself up. Briefly, I was in a similar situation but mine was a bit more intense. The girl actually liked me but her friend didn't. You know, sometimes second opinion is all it takes to ruin your plans. I had enough balls to leave myself before it was too late. But that shit hurts. I know what you mean.

EE__Student · 2018-03-09T16:40:24+00:00

So, the girl clearly wasn't attracted to you, then you spoke to her about being in your bedroom? The fuck?

innergamedude · 2018-03-09T15:45:19+00:00

She tells me that "we're going to go over here, don't follow us, alright?"

I just said something beta like, "oh, alright."

Honestly, I don't think you Beta-ed out or anything and I think the bigger mistake is considering how you came off over what her experience was. Women have random dudes on them all the time and a lot of them really just won't go away. That's a crappy experience. In a situation like this, I would just always make my priority be showing them that I'm perfectly fine with them not being interested, that I'm not going to be pissed or follow them around or anything. My response would just been, "No worries, have an awesome night!" and given her high five or a fist bump or something to show no hard feelings.

ethical_pa · 2018-03-09T15:55:35+00:00

Like others said, rejection is part of the game. It'll sort your ego out real quick if you stick with it... It's fuckin hard.

Keep in mind that they didn't reject you personally. They don't know you; they didn't get a chance to know that your cool. They just rejected a guy in a situation where they thought that was the best decision.

Not gonna lie to you... After a hard blow out like that, things will be a bit hard. You'll be doubting yourself and looking/hoping for a good reaction in future approaches. This is bad since you'll be approval seeking, and in validation mode. Just push through it and try to be focused on the technical side instead of the emotional side.

Deep_freeze202 · 2018-03-09T17:22:48+00:00

I think where you fucked up was continuing to pursue after she turned you down to dance, that was basically her telling you she wasn't attracted. Take it as a learning experience, you'll get a better feel for when a girl isn't interested over time. Remember attraction isn't negotiable don't let it bring you down.

blunt_eastwood · 2018-03-09T17:26:53+00:00

She feels threatened by you and reacted. There's no need to have a "comeback". That's childish and immature. If these girls don't make you feel good then find some others who do.

BestSC86 · 2018-03-09T16:07:36+00:00

One of the most important aspect of learning game is calibration and reading the signs of whether a girl is investing in the seduction or not.

Is she interested?

From your short description, it seems that you might have been ignoring or not noticing her discomfort or disinterest to the point that your plowing ahead required such a harsh rejection.

Rejection happens, no big deal, regardless of what the PUA scammers on all the internet sites claim about how they ALWAYS get every girl they choose.

I would suggest that you review this interaction simply to analyze how the girl was reacting while you were plowing thru and were their signs that you missed or ignored. Such as was she not making eye contact, giving short responses, lack of enthusiasm in her tone or eyes while interacting with you.....or others.

That is really one of the big lies of PUA..that by just plowing ahead with your game or script that you will win her over.......untrue......you don't turn a girl from being not attracted to you over to wanting to fuck you in 30 mins of game......it doesn't work that way.......it really is just showing obtuse guys how to not fuck it up when a girl IS interested in them. You usually can tell in the first few moments if there is interest and particularly disinterest.

I suspect you need to focus an extra amount of time in determining your target's actual interest in addition to just learn the scripts and lines of game.

thetahill · 2018-03-09T17:57:46+00:00

Welcome to the game haha. This is pretty common. The worst thing about women in clubs hanging in large groups is there are always friends who act like this. Often it's jealousy that you weren't into them.

I was talking to a girl recently, who I actually knew. Her wasted friend comes between us and starts getting hostile. My response was basically, to the other girl, "what the hell is your friend doing?" It took this other girl three times to calm her friend down. I found out later this friend is desperate and is the one who usually gets attention, and was pissed she wasn't getting any. It's the cost of trying. Keep your head up!

How I mentally deal with this stuff is to just laugh about it. At the moment I just think ahead a few years and realize these stories are the best and we'll laugh about them for years.

enkae7317 · 2018-03-09T19:54:42+00:00

Been there. Talked to these two girls.

One of them was semi-interested but her friend wasn't having ANY of that shit tonight. She literally got in my face and was like LEAVE NOW and repeated that shit ad nauseum. I felt completely destryoed afterwards. Like my stomach did a 180 flip, tied itself around my intestines, and died. But hey I decided it was all a part of the process. When you see that rejection IS life and everything is okay afterwards, its not that big a deal. I walked away, feeling horrible. But then I did something I never did. I walked into the middle of the dance floor and just stood there, closed my eyes, and embraced the rejection. I stood like that for a good 10 minutes before moving on to the next girl.

It felt liberating.

PS: you did nothing wrong here. So long as you learn what not to do in the future. Everyone oversteps their boundary at one point. That's how you learn. Everyone gets rejected harshly to the point where they cry. That's how you get stronger. Even one of the best stated he cried after a cruel rejection once when he was first starting out.

Dating973 · 2018-03-11T11:35:38+00:00

Ignore them totally unless they approach you.

2018-03-09T15:11:01+00:00

Should have said "I'm going to go over here, dont follow me ok?"

2018-03-09T18:12:25+00:00

I think you pulled the trigger too quick and came off as a creep, and everyone caught it. Sorry, yo. Fucking way she goes, Rick.

Eliminatron · 2018-03-09T18:27:02+00:00

Just all part of the learning experience. Just don’t talk about the bedroom/sex after you have already been rejected next time. Slow it down just a tad bro

2018-03-09T21:47:29+00:00

Some good comments here already, if you ever need a witty comeback when something unsightly like this goes down just say something along the lines of..."wow that pretty face doesn't match your nasty attitude." and keep it moving.

I've had girls come up, introduce themselves and apologize to me later in the night on more than one occasion after realizing I'm not the average frustrated chump that would just let it slide

Ed_G_ShitlordEsquire · 2018-03-09T21:48:20+00:00

"Don't worry I can take a hint, plenty more Lays in the bag".

JusKeepinItReal · 2018-03-10T02:57:16+00:00

Ouch. that hurt ME

2018-03-10T12:50:37+00:00

Turning down the dance should really be taken the same way as 'fuck off'. The fact that you didn't get this means they had to spell it out to you in no unclear terms.

LingeringGnome · 2018-03-10T20:52:02+00:00

Stop drinking so much when you game. This reads like you got dopey-drunk and lost your ability to properly gauge a situation.

danielinthebox · 2018-03-09T13:54:52+00:00

Some girls are just straight up bitches and it has nothing to do with you. Like for example they might be in a bad mood already and take it out on you, don't take it personally. Stay calm, grounded and unreactive, it will make you stronger and develop a thick skin.

I literally walked up to girls before and been told to fuck off before I have even introduced myself. Hurts like a mofo but fuck it .

furacaotropical · 2018-03-09T13:30:21+00:00

fuck that bro, i have been through something similar in the past where this friend from a girl i was talking to came out of nowhere and told me to back off or otherwise i would be seen as "unpleasant", it did hurt me back then but nowadays i'm totally fine when something like this happens, for some reason girls think their friends can't turn down someone on their own sometimes and feel that they must step in, even though most of the times you didn't say or do anything wrong. don't think too much of it and keep going

2018-03-10T23:29:02+00:00

Next time just laugh and leave, without saying a word. She was a cunt by saying you that. If her friend wanted to reject you, she could have say so without being rude. There was no need for that, so you shouldn't let it faze you. You actually dodged a bullet, so be happy for that.

danielinthebox · 2018-03-09T13:58:35+00:00

Keep grinding don't let that rude cow dishearten you. If you analysed your game after and honestly can't see where you went wrong she is just a bitch, if you did do something wrong fix it.

Title	"Don't Follow Us, Alright?"
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	77
Comments	44
Date	March 9, 2018 7:46 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/8350j9/dont_follow_us_alright/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/dont-follow-us-alright.1287146 https://theredarchive.com/post/1287146

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