Getting better at storytelling?

LS_NickHoss · 2012-09-27T03:05:04+00:00

I love storytelling and love teaching it. I think a storytelling thread would be a great idea if everybody chips in. But you have to understand before creating a story that every phase of a pick up has the undercurrent of emotions. Attraction arouses interest, qualification spurts praise and comfort should span an array. These can be happy, fearful, moderately angry, horny, etc. A girl wants to see the whole spectrum your capability so she can get an idea of you at your best and your worst. If she can figure out how you tick, she’ll know how you tock, so to speak.

The basic, face to face way of doing this is through storytelling. Being a good storyteller involves two keys:

1) Emotion over Logic

Speak from an emotional perspective, not a factual one. Back in the barrens of Canada where I grew up, it’s almost hunting season right now. If I was to describe to a woman how hunting goes, I wouldn’t say “You walk through the snow in the bush for about five hours and then you shoot at a deer when it pops out.” That doesn’t have much emotional cache.

However, if I say…

“A lot of people think hunting is just shooting a gun, but there is so much more to it. Last week, we were pushing bush (1), and God, we had to trudge through the snow forever. Seriously, I thought (2) my feet were going to freeze off. I couldn’t feel them. Anyway, we finally stopped at this little creaky warm-up shake, like the kind where you expect an chainsaw murder to pop out from behind the door (3), so we got all undressed and fired up the stove and all. Anyway, my buddy looks up and goes, ‘Hey, did you just see that?’ And sure as shit (4), we looked out the window and there was this dark, blotch standing against the trees. The thing is that we can’t see if it has a rack or not–you can only shoot so many deer each season, so sometimes you don’t want to shoot a girl deer too early because you want horns right (5). We were both undressed already, but I couldn’t let this chance go by, so I’m like to Jeremy (6), “Fuck it! Let’s get it.” So I open the window on the shack, but I’m really slow about it because I’m scared to scare off the deer, eh. I stick out my gun and have it clutched against my shoulder, and I’m timing it to my heart beat (7), so I can get the shot off between beats. Then… BOOM! I fire it, and we just looked at each other like (8)…”

(1) This saying draws a person into the story. It’s not, “We were walking through the forest.” It will get a little laugh and engage her.

(2) If I say, “My feet were really cold,” it won’t resonate emotionally. When you say, I thought, I felt, I believed, you’re injecting character into the story because the listener can get inside the head of the hero (you).

(3) The listener can relate to the feeling of the cabin through this relatable phrase. They get a feeling for the cabin.

(4) Another regional saying. I’m being real with here and if I say this right, I’m really into the story. When trying to elicit emotion, this will draw her in. So far we’ve gone from a light-hearted start to eerie to dramatic.

(5) Providing clarification. A person needs to understand the terrain of the story in order to navigate it. If I give her context for what I’m saying, I set its level of importance.

(6) Spiking emotion back up. Instead of saying, “We went after the deer.” I put her in the cabin with me and say this to her like she was hunting with me.

(7) Slowing down the pace of the story. Controlling the pace controls the emotional spikes, which keeps the listener on their toes, which draws them in more. Also would be a good chance to touch in this instance.

(8) Giving her a certain look here will resonate more emotionally than saying, “We looked at each other funny.” Body language over words. It’s also building character and emotion, not jumping to the facts.

You get the picture. Everything you say will play in her mind like it’s on a movie screen. If you want to let her know what hunting is like, tell her a story about hunting. Don’t read her the facts like you’re a talking Wiki.

If you want it to be more of a heart-melter, steer the emotions and characters toward that. If you want it to spike attraction, shorten the story up and focus on the excitement. My story above isn’t super deep.

2) Characters over Plot

Let’s keep my story from above and look at how I develop the characters. People relate to emotions, and in order to experience emotions they have to be in the shoes of the person in the story. They don’t know how the story plays out until you say the next sentence, so by telling what the character thinks or how they feel, in real-time, you put them in the story. This elicits the emotion.

If you just giving plot, it’s tantamount to just giving facts. “Nick and Jeremy went hunting. Nick got cold. Jeremy said to go into the shack. The boys saw a deer. They shot at the deer.” Pretty dull, no emotional hook. Adding the characters feeling, diction, etc. makes the story come alive.

Anyway, I realize this is a true hillbilly bush story, but it’s also a REAL story. The storyteller can’t fake it. In attraction, you can drop a quip about how you know the door girl who let you all in the club for free, but in comfort that’s not what she wants to know. She’s seen the flash; she wants something real. It’s all in how you tell that real stuff. You bring the ‘you’ to life.

That's been my take on it.

Canei · 2012-09-27T06:22:28+00:00

So guys, I had the craziest day today.

First off, I had a horrible nights sleep. My ex-girlfriend told me late last night that she's doing something dangerous, like to the point where I'm legit scared for her, and there's nothing I can do about it. I promised her I wouldn't say what it is, and she has her reasons, but the point is that I was having nightmares all night. I kept waking up terrified and sweating.

Well, I guess having nightmares is hard work, because the first thought, like, before my eyes even opened, the first thought in my head when I woke up was "FOOD! NEED FOOD!" I'm never this hungry. So I practically lunge to my fridge, and as I'm looking at the delicious food, my salvation, it hits me like a nine iron to the gut: "Fuck. Today is Yom Kippur. I can't eat food today"

So I'm devastated. I just sit on my couch like "what am I gonna do?" How the fuck am I going to make it through today?" I was too hungry to go back to sleep, and so I do what every man being tortured does, I tried to distract myself.

So I hit craigslist like a MADMAN to look for jobs, and BOOM! The first post that catches my eye is this insane dream job. I start to smile as I read this thing. They want to pay someone a very good amount of money to drive around to bars and, for all practical purposes to open sets. And basically the only thing they want in a candidate, the only credential you need to do this job is to be a fun person. So my heart is racing now because I just want this job SO BAD. I forgot all about wanting food, and I just started typing an email. And I keep typing. And I keep typing. And I was in the ZONE, bra.

Well, I don't know if I was delirious from fasting or what, but I somehow didn't look at the clock for almost four whole hours. Picture that, for four hours I was so in the fucking zone typing and editing that I forgot about my crippling hunger.

Well, I look at the finally really look at the email I had typed to the dream job people, and I realize that it's bizzare. I mean, this was not something you send a potential employer. It was filled with emotocons, fonts of all colors and sizes, and I even had inserted a hyperlink to a Black Keys song with the instructions: "The rest of this application has a soundtrack. Please open this link in a new tab before you continue." I mean, every other line was about how handsome or awesome I am. Complete hunger-induced INSANITY.

So I'm hungry again, and now I'm dually dejected because I wasted half my day. I still really want this job SO BAD but to keep typing with no fuel? Impossible. I would have DIED fellas, so I say fuck it and send it, so pissed at myself I can't look in the mirror, then I just collapse on my couch PASS. THE. FUCK. OUT.

When I wake up, same feeling of hunger as the morning "FOOD! NEED FOOD!" and I jump up to go to the fridge again before I realized what day it was and that I'd been napping. Guys, I felt like crying. But I realized that the sun was about to set, which means I GET TO EAT! And now my mouth is watering like a hose because my friends wife is cooking this huge delicious meal to break the fast, and it's just a short bike ride away!

So as I rush out the door, something possesses me to check my email and, low and behold, dream job people. "I'm a Black Keys fan. Let's talk tomorrow."

I think that thought is what kept me from crashing my bike. I'm surprised I made it, because I coasted in on fumes. While I was eating dinner tonight, and I'm talking lox and bagles, matzah ball soup, two types of kugel, the works, but while I was eating this amazing homecooked food with my good friends, it was just this perfect moment. I was perfectly content.

How did I do? Though this all happened, it wasn't really all that interesting while it was happening. I just tried to exaggerate all the emotions a ton.

JonnGotti · 2012-09-27T02:56:58+00:00

embellishment and elaboration my friend.

In this way, reddit has actually become a useful tool. Take some of those askreddit stories that i know everybody reads, and twist those into a story that would fit your life. Take some of the facts/jokes out of there and insert them into your own story.

Lastly, its not what you say, its how you say it. (this comes up a lot in this subreddit but ill give a small anecdote that might make it easier)

I cant begin to describe some of the absolutely pointless mundane stories ive told that actually get a smile or spark interest simply because i make it somewhat interesting by talking about it with both confidence and a polytonal tongue.

extr3mest · 2012-09-27T04:42:17+00:00

This was naturally my strongest point coming into learning seduction so it actually makes it my weakest teaching point, but I will try to give a few keys I realize I do.

1) Speak with confidence and ENTHUSIASM! I cannot emphasize how important being enthusiastic in your telling is, if you aren't excited and into telling your story why would anyone listening care?

2) Talk about the details and how you felt! Often times in guy to guy interactions we just give each other the tl;dr version of the story. When talking to a girl go in detail and make sure you tell her about how you felt during the story.

3) Real life events make the best stories! I know for some people this is hard, but even if its not exciting telling real stories has led to better success for me. In this case it really just is all in the telling.

Biggest other tip I have is story telling is a good excuse to kino hard! Also keeping them physically engaged will help keep their attention.

2012-09-27T16:16:07+00:00

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TrippAdvice1 · 2012-09-27T04:44:04+00:00

Wow, so weird. I was about to post something about storytelling. I'm trying to get better as well. Any book suggestions out there?

SoInsightful · 2012-09-27T12:27:24+00:00

If not I think we should start a weekly practice thread where everyone practices trying to make something mundane from their day in to an interesting story. "Mundane monday" maybe.

Please make this a subreddit. I want a daily dose of this until the structure is completely ingrained in my mind.

2012-09-27T15:33:23+00:00

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2012-09-27T15:42:35+00:00

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leodoestheopposite · 2012-09-27T23:05:36+00:00

You have two options, each with their own pros and cons:

Join Toastmasters (long process)
Take Improv classes (shorter process, and more towards humor)

TheBlackBic · 2012-09-27T05:55:33+00:00

A lot of storytelling just comes naturally. It's a part of everyday life and if you haven't picked up the skill by now, it's probably going to be pretty damn difficult. I don't think it's impossible to get a little better, but, I really think storytelling is one of those "you-either-have-it-or-you-don't" kind of things.

Title	Getting better at storytelling?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	125
Comments	52
Date	September 27, 2012 1:56 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/10jhxw/getting_better_at_storytelling/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/getting-better-at-storytelling.1340229 https://theredarchive.com/post/1340229

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