How do I become more talkative?

weiyushit · 2018-06-25T17:12:37+00:00

When conversations run dry, FORD <<Family>> - "hey do you have a sibling?" "do you wish to have a sister?" etc. <<Occupation>> - "who do u think ull date at ur job?" "which part of the job do u like the most?" etc. <<Recreation >> "what do you do for fun?" "oh would you like to play badminton together?" etc. <<Dream >> "what makes u stay at your workplace till late all the time?" " what do u dream of doing as a job?" etc.

Statements -" I think ducks are cool" Viewpoints - "eww I hate those things, makes me wanna vomit" Reminds me of. - "hey that reminds me of my brother! Blah blah blah"

suitcasecity · 2018-06-25T16:56:17+00:00

One useful tip i keep is to think out loud. Instead of thinking wow thats a cool shirt or whatever you see someone wearing, point it out, say it out loud.

2018-06-25T15:47:33+00:00

Try to start doing more things like volunteering or taking trips. That gives you something to talk about and makes you more interesting.

2018-06-25T15:34:37+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Pooshmeu · 2018-06-25T16:08:38+00:00

It's easy to be honest, instead of thinking, say

jn14j · 2018-06-25T17:19:46+00:00

Try making it a daily habit to try to talk to anyone and everyone you can. Along with this, I recommend reading "how to win friends and influence people - Dale Carnegie", it was the starting point for me to overcome general social awkwardness.

floppyjabjab · 2018-06-25T18:42:35+00:00

Hi I have been one of the leaders of the Inner Circle London of RSD from 2015 to 2017 before settling with a gf.
here's 2 main points.
1. don't listen what a woman say watch and listen what she responds to, women will complain that men dont talk much but reality is women LOVE to talk about themselves and any gossip shit, have you ever notice how a woman reality is more often than not all about herself, even when she wants you to be high value is mostly because she wants to identify as a female of high value herself, so ideally you should do 20% of talk and let her 80% of the rest, that of course means you HAVE to be willing to do at least the bare minum, not be straight up silent or shy

You already are talkative my friend, remove all the filters. when you are with your buddies I bet you talk about anything freely and have no filters, you need to adopt the same free mind. The reason you filter yourself is you put the woman in a pedastal, you filter yourself not to "fuck up" or say something wrong, that needs to change and you will pretend you talk with someone you already know, control the frame and any "fuck up" can always be reframed as a positive thing.
now obviously you also need to implement a man to woman tone so maybe pretend you talking with ur buddy but also be purposeful and sexual, you need to show that you are interested in her sexually (dont be too forced on this nor be uncalibrated, like you cant say I want to fuck you if she's asking how you've been).
You can practise by talking to girls you dont really have any sexual interest whatsoever, make a mental note on how you are unfiltered and next time do the same with the girl you like.
remember there is abundance of women out there and no matter how bad you mess up there's always plenty new hot girls you will be attracted to

As final note, you can watch a lot of stand up comedy or do improv class to ramp up the fun during conversations. spike her emotions and you will attract her

yargdpirate · 2018-06-25T15:24:39+00:00

I've enjoyed watching comedians riff (spontaneous stuff only, standup is rigidly planned). Careful with the profanity and edgy content of course, but it's a great way to pick up talking skills. It's their job to be great talkers, after all.

notathr0waway1 · 2018-06-25T17:03:11+00:00

You don't become more talkative. You become aware of the fact that you aren't very talkative and work to deal with that first. Start paying attention and observe more how it affects the people around you. Then decide: it is truly advantageous to become more talkative or not?

5hr00m · 2018-06-25T18:03:09+00:00

You'll do better with the women that talk a lot. Own your introvertedness but by all means improve your conversational ability

notlegendnotproud · 2018-06-25T18:12:03+00:00

As hard as it might be for you, you should ask questions about other peoples interests, in return, they'll be more curious about you. Try and relate what they say to you. If somebody you talk to enjoys horse back riding, ask about that world and what their horse's name is and why they chose that name... once you get more information out of the person, you will most likely stumble upon things that you can relate to.

idontdrinksoda42 · 2018-06-25T19:21:42+00:00

Dont filter yourself

web209 · 2018-06-25T19:01:37+00:00

Don’t try and sensor what you say. Like in your head if you want to make a joke but then think “no that’s stupid” “how can I be funny” what do I say” you’re never gonna succeed. Just relax and say what comes to your mind. Have confidence in yourself and what you say don’t sensor your speech. Obviously as long as it’s not offensive. That’s something that has helped me cause then you aren’t all up in your head you are just communicating and having fun. Good luck man.

CollaterLDamage · 2018-06-25T19:39:55+00:00

The old way people used to practice was talking in the mirror. You set a timer for about 2-4 minutes and just talk. Imagine you are talking to someone but dont talk as 2 people.

_Jake_The_Snake_ · 2018-06-25T20:03:08+00:00

First, ask more questions. When you ask questions, the person you are talking to will usually reciprocate. That will give you a chance to start talking about the things you like and are interested in. Don't cut yourself off or think that it will not interest them. If women are complaining that they are talking too much, that means they genuinely want to hear what you have to say.

Secondly, when you ask a question, follow up: why did you ask that question? Talk about why their answer was relevant to you and your interests. Add in something that happened to you or something related to what they just told you. Don't be a one-upper, contribute to dialogue. If they have done something and you have done the same thing, you can compare and contrast your experiences. If they have done something and you have done something very different, you can still compare and contrast those two experiences! That's my strategy.

Willbo · 2018-06-25T20:17:07+00:00

I struggle with this too and have tried everything short of a cocaine habit. Trying to entertain women and keep them interested while being an introvert is one of the hardest things ever!

Here are a few things that have helped me:

Reading more books. I've noticed that when I don't read for months on end and just listen to my inner dialogue, I find it hard to verbalize my thoughts and figure out the correct vocabulary of what I want to say. Reading increases your vocabulary and trains your communication skills.

Training myself. Whenever I'm in my car or alone I'll try to verbalize my thoughts and talk or write to myself. Many times it's just rambling but I'll try to explain concepts as if I was explaining it to someone.

Warming up. If I know I'll be at an event with a lot of people or I'm inviting a girl I know I'll have to entertain, I'll warm myself up before I go out.

Meditation. Concentrating on your breath builds your focus and makes it easier to concentrate on what you want to say instead of all the other shit happening in social situations such as loud music, people walking by, etc. Also helps you reduce anxiety.

Nootropics. I've tried a few nootropics that help, particularly noopept, caffeine+theanine, aniracetam. Not recommended for everyone, do your research.

2018-06-25T21:16:57+00:00

try to avoid directly thinking about words. think exactly what you’re doing at that current moment and you’ll talk without thought

2018-06-25T22:07:22+00:00

Train at home. Pick a random item, toothpicks for example, and set a 2-minute timer and don't take a moment to stop talking.

FarmerFred52 · 2018-06-25T22:15:22+00:00

Cocaine worked wonders on me back in the 80's.

CatontheRoad · 2018-06-25T22:51:46+00:00

Ask more questions. It makes them open up more, and makes it seem like you're talking more, when really you're just fulfilling the listener role more.

life-of-TT · 2018-06-26T05:07:13+00:00

Your best chance of spreading oats inside her is to make good conversation. Work ok being more talkative.

ReighIB · 2018-06-26T06:27:41+00:00

What exactly were they complaining about? Did they feel bad that they did all the talking and wants to know more about you? I dunno, most people preferred to be heard and understood more so than hearing me talk. I rather listen than talk so I don't mind hanging out with girls who likes to talk because I would rather listen. If you're literally not saying anything then I understand. In that case just paraphrase what the other person said because being heard and understood is such vital need for most human beings.

hunterpua · 2018-06-26T07:46:00+00:00

Talk about what you like to talk about.

You should be asking how you can make girls more talkative around you though.

recyclablebanthas · 2018-06-26T12:32:37+00:00

1

How do I turn it around so Im the one that keep the talk going?

When she's talking, you need to listen actively. She's literally giving you free information. She's giving you things you can and should be following up on.

2

I have a mild autism so Im not naturally talkative unless it is areas of my interest.

Look, I'm not going to get into a debate about what part of the spectrum you're on, but not being talkative unless it's about things you're interested in, is something that people who aren't even on the spectrum suffer from. If being selfish about conversation topic interest was a symptom of being on the spectrum, then most people would be autistic*.*

The solution here is two-fold:

Realize that simply being talkative is not really the solution. You don't jump-start the conversation by trying to talk.
A conversation is like a tennis match. Talking is hitting the ball to them, and listening is the much neglected other half of the skill set that's needed so you can actually respond when they hit the ball back.

3

Obviously communication is important for ladies, they want a man that can lead.

You're missing something here. Communication is important to everyone. Are you really going to sit there and say that you don't want information and intel on someone you're trying to get at or someone you're dating regularly?

And to get specific, it's not just a desire for "a man that can lead." It's a man who is able to balance a clear expression of what he wants, with the ability to realize what she wants and lead both of you to what you want. Trying to lead is not effective if she doesn't want to follow. How will she want to follow? If you're making it enjoyable or beneficial for her.

Clear explanation of this idea, by James Marshall.

Avra0 · 2018-06-25T18:27:03+00:00

Echo technique

roxxe · 2018-06-25T19:28:13+00:00

Pretend to care

2018-06-25T21:21:07+00:00

Observations are critical for this.

decadearray · 2018-06-25T22:06:15+00:00

Adderall

HNTI · 2018-06-26T07:18:00+00:00

Get drunk.

Title	How do I become more talkative?
Author	5hr00m
Upvotes	99
Comments	49
Date	June 25, 2018 2:44 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/8tr2ah/how_do_i_become_more_talkative/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-become-more-talkative.1448755 https://theredarchive.com/post/1448755

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