Perfected the "work on yourself" part. What to do next to be successful?

Bath · 2022-01-03T08:13:51+00:00

You have to go out and actually meet women somehow. Dating apps, cold approach, meetups, etc. Some men think that looks and money are all you need to get a girlfriend.

While having those things certainly helps a lot, if you don't have basic social skills, you will not get a loving girlfriend, it doesn't matter how rich you are. If you don't socialize with women, you will not get a girlfriend. Period.

Blackmetalpenguin90 · 2022-01-03T10:06:32+00:00

The problem with the "work on yourself" part is that it alone will never get you anywhere. There's no magical finish line where you're suddenly "good enough" and a girl will be given to you for all your hard work. I think in a certain sense these things can even hinder you, in terms that due to all your achivements, you build up the ego of "all right, now I DESERVE a hot girl", which only leads to avoidance, because you don't want to enter any situation where someone may reject you.

You'll have to face up to your anxieties and go up to women. There's no two ways about it. Alternatively, you can try dating apps, but if you're generally rated as a 7, your results will probably not be up to your (reasonable) standards.

reversedbydark · 2022-01-03T13:18:03+00:00

Have you read 3% Men by Correy Wayne? If not do so!

You need to put yourself in situations where you can actually meet women and that shouldn't be to hard if you have money and a nice looking car.

Don't worry too much about friends or being social, you can fake those...but again you do need to talk to women. Also, don't over complicate what to say.

If you 'see an opening' just go up to her and say: 'What's your name?' and see how she responds.

Let me know if you have anymore questions.

excentrik-art · 2022-01-03T08:55:05+00:00

Ok lets start planning from where you are.

You have no local friends, this is where you start. Question 1 - what you want to do with friends in your place (IRL) you dont wanna fuck? Tabletop games, music jams, sports, etc.? Decide. Now, you have cash, buy some stuff. TT games, music stuff, sport stuff... Go online, find local facebook groups and ask a question - hey I live here in Canada or whatever, I would like to meet some new friends so we can do (activity) in my place. Also go on dating sites and do the same advertising - I live here and I am looking for people to do this activity with me.

Make an event around the topic you chose. Start inviting those people in. Have fun. Repeat. In matter of weeks you should have some qualifying and elimination rounds, meeting some local people. It will be quite tiring, but you should meet some people you like to be around. Do not forget, you are the master of the situation here, be picky who will be invited next week.

Now a month or two later you should have some semi-stable people you somewhat like. Your goal here is quantity which you will reforge to quality. All those people you invited and that had fun at your place will now be a possible reference to a girl, or an invite to a party. That is your goal.

There is so much more you can do, DM if you wanna talk more

creamyturtle · 2022-01-03T12:30:51+00:00

I would suggest getting an easy part time job a couple days a week at a social place like a restaurant, bar, etc. you will make some male friends you can hang out with and eventually some female friends

slunkinx · 2022-01-03T07:28:28+00:00

stop thinking about women. just go about your life and don't be a simp. if you're really all that, women will love you

b_a_d_r0b0t · 2022-01-03T15:16:57+00:00

You bring so much to the table. Ask yourself this question, what does she bring to the table besides a used pussy? I would rather pay for sex and focus on my happiness.

cronasminate · 2022-01-03T23:35:22+00:00

Have an actual life plan. What do you want to experience? What do you need to get those experiences. Are you goal realistic. You have the resources, but do you have the behavioral aptitude to do what it takes to get there.

What you do can vary wildly depending on where you want to be. If you want a typical social life then start building a lifestyle locally. Have some friends locally and get to know people.

If you want the life of an adventurer you start building your lifestyle around traveling and meeting random people in your adventures.

If you want a traditional life then that's when you go join some exclusive club or like a church that upholds those values. Much of getting what you want is strategic and logistical, otherwise you leave lot of things to chance you don't make use of your free time.

Pick up is simply a tool to get one of the components in life settled, but it is just one piece of the puzzle.

Dizzy_Paramedic6216 · 2022-01-04T06:36:10+00:00

It’s not about photo rating. You can look 7 or 8 or 9 whatever but a woman won’t sleep with you because no attraction. Attraction is 50% look but also 50% attitude, flirting, escalating, humor, body language, confidence etc. So you don’t have it you’re not 7 you’re 3.5.

First you need feel comfortable in your own skin. Once you do you will feel comfortable in bars or dates or business meetings or anything really.

Just go to a bar, doesn’t have to be weekend, so you get comfortable. Go sit on the bar, with confidence say loudly “Barkeep! Jack on the rocks” and put the bill on the table, leave a nice tip - they’ll remember you next time, even when it’s really busy and hard to get drinks. If it’s a slow night that’s cool, chat with the bartender or whoever next to you be friendly to everyone.

Women that will look at you will see you as a confident guy. If you catch a woman looking at you just smile or wave, with confidence, she’s interested, sit with her for a drink and chat and don’t be boring. Also let her do most the talking, while you lead the conversation, The more women you talk to you will get more confident. Don’t be afraid to flirt or touch her hand or escalate if you see she likes you.

If all goes well, good talk, sexual tension, eye contact, she moves her body close to you, she doesn’t move away when you touch her etc. Then you kiss her and if she didn’t object - you tell her something to get out of there to your place. Like “We are both two strangers in a bar, life is short and we should enjoy it, let’s get out of here” or something like this. You can say anything in a sexual way, even “wanna come over to my place to listen to some music?” Or “wanna come over and ill show you my puppy?”. It’s not what you say in this point, it’s how you say because she already wanna sleep with you. Give her a hand. She take your hand and you take her home. Make sure the bar is close to your home for convenience.

Bar pick up is easy. If she wants you she will come. If not it’s fine.

I did good in clubs when I was in my early 20s. Now I feel like the oldest guy in the club so I don’t go to clubs.

Cocktail bars are better to meet friendly single women. Sport bars you can go watch the game and get comfortable.

Treat women with respect but don’t treat women like they rare and precious. Don’t be afraid to make a sexual joke or hint or comment if there’s chemistry, women love this in a men.

Long answer. That’s my two cents about bars. But the best places to meet are actually the beach, or the park, or walking the dog, or the market, or your job etc’. But do everything. Be outgoing and be out.

These dating apps, I am not a big fan, but the most important thing is to make the first move when you see someone you like. They won’t make their first move unless you’re famous, so get comfortable doing it.

I’m my younger days many opportunities I didn’t go for it. Now when a woman gives me a signal I go for it, don’t waste time because your 20s will pass quick and you don’t want to be inexperienced in your 30s.

Good luck.

Title	Perfected the "work on yourself" part. What to do next to be successful?
Author	Asperger1001
Upvotes	31
Comments	49
Date	January 3, 2022 7:10 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ruvrm0/perfected_the_work_on_yourself_part_what_to_do/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/perfected-the-work-on-yourself-part-what-to-do.1269776 https://theredarchive.com/post/1269776

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