Tips for going to bars alone?

L0n3W01f_ · 2022-01-16T02:37:04+00:00

Only weird if you make it weird. Go out there and have fun man.

letsgetrandy · 2022-01-16T03:21:55+00:00

I have been going alone to bars for 15 years and picking up lots of women that way.

jelly_blood · 2022-01-16T02:39:01+00:00

I’m about to go to a bar by myself, so you’re not alone homie. I don’t know if I should approach someone or let them approach me but I’ll try to keep to myself and not but in conversations. Good luck 👍🏼

rahhumilovedogs · 2022-01-16T03:19:26+00:00

Sit at the bar! Talking to bar tenders can yeild some super cool stories, plus lots of people constantly coming up so chance to meet other people is high. Lots of people go alone. Goto a neighborhood or more upscale bar.

Used to frequent a pretty nice bar with hot bar tenders. We would drink after close and it was free. Owner would come in and hang out too. Fun times!

DontTakePeopleSrsly · 2022-01-16T03:09:10+00:00

I have a bar downstairs I go to alone all the time. I know all the regulars and staff.

Pick a bar or two, go fairly regularly and you will make friends. I’ve been to several parties at regulars and bartenders places. I’ve also dated several bartenders and servers.

AccomplishedBrief126 · 2022-01-16T05:42:29+00:00

I was you month ago but I decided fuck it imma go alone and it wasn’t bad I spoke to people nearby and we became friends and it was fun

ronn10 · 2022-01-16T08:48:02+00:00

Meditation is key for game

Adventurous_Card_144 · 2022-01-16T17:14:51+00:00

Of course it is weird.

Just as it is weird to wake up at 3 am to workout ... but that's why some people are professional athletes.

Just as weird as playing the piano for 10 hours a day ... but that's why some people are better at playing the piano than others.

Of course man, if you expect to have the results only 1/10 of guys have, you may have to do stuff that's not normal. The sooner you accept it, the better.

Tips:

Unless you are traveling often to different places, make it your mission to learn how to make club friends and chose going out with them over solo. Going solo is good for the soul, it is a good skill to have and there's times where no one wants to go out, but if you are purposely not going with friends you are being not effective. Don't go solo if you can. Make club friends.
Tell people you went out solo and are looking for good bars to warmup. Don't do it chasing their validation, just mention it, or don't mention it if you don't feel like to, Quite often if they see you solo they ask why are you alone, and ask you if you want to join them.
If you join a group, bring value to them. If it's guys bring them a couple of girls. If that's not within your skill reach, at least try to go and talk to them with the intention of introducing them to your new friends. If it's a group of girls (or guys and girls), befriend everyone, try to make jokes and try to not take value as much as you can. Don't, don't try to pickup girls in that group. That's corny af.
If you don't find a group to join you, go to crowded bars/clubs where it is normal to merge. Approach there
Avoid tables like the plague, but if you end up in one and you paid for a bottle, ask the waiter to bring some girls to you. Most of the time if you paid bottle service they will try to bring someone in. Don't try to hook up with the girls they bring in, but use it as social proof.
Approach as soon as you enter the venue and keep rolling the dice for at least 10 minutes no time in between interactions.
Give it time. Everyone is scared af when they go out solo their first time. They still scared the second, the third and usually it never goes fully away. Live with it. That's the price to get girls, meet awesome friends and overall enjoy an amazing life. I can take a bit of fear here and there in exchange.

Classic_Common_9163 · 2022-01-16T03:10:19+00:00

Easy. Sit close to the bartender and chat him/her up

freevisiondesign · 2022-01-16T15:04:30+00:00

So I’m a Uber driver and on Thursday I drove this young girl to the bar, we were talking and she said she was going alone to get a drink and do some dancing. I told her that’s pretty cool and I wish I had courage to do that. She invited me to come out with her but I declined, but she give me insurance that you can just go to the bar and just have fun by yourself. Most likely no one is going to notice you are alone and if they do I’m pretty sure no one will make fun of you or make you fell awkward. Think about have you ever made fun of someone for being alone?

Ok-Physics5106 · 2022-01-17T17:59:22+00:00

Let me put it this way if a girl you were attracted to was at the bar alone, would you care? Same thing from a girls p.o.v for the most part, they do have safety issues that men dont usually.

That said I go out alone and have been for 25 years and prefer it, unless its a group of girls.

Forces me to talk to people, less competition, no need to waste time "winging", no one asking to go to different spots, etc.

In the 25 years I have been doing this I have had maybe 5 ask "where my friends were". This is a bad sign, this means: A. "You should go find them and leave me alone."

B. "Your not attractive to me I want to see if your friends are better"

C. Shit test.

If this happens I say "they left" and thats it.

My advice for going solo is:

Go to crowded places and no one cares, usually they are busy in there own world.
Go during busy sports events. Nfl is prime playoff time, easy opener is "what team are you going for?"
Have good energy before you enter the scene. Be social with everyone dont be a wall flower.
Hotel lobby bars are pretty good for solo.
Be well dressed, groomed, social.

Delicious_Ad_1853 · 2022-01-16T04:27:42+00:00

Is it unusual? Yeah, it's unusual. Unless you're the middle-aged alcoholic that goes to the same bar every day to hide from the fact that he hates his life.

But that doesn't matter to you. What you want to know is if it's ok for you to go out to bars to build your life. Yes, you can. Just be careful that you don't become the middle-aged alcoholic that knows everybody in one bar.

You want to be the guy that can walk into any bar and get to know anybody. That's a skill that will serve you well. So... approach, approach, approach.

P.S. A wise man once told me that nobody goes to bars for the alcohol; it's way cheaper and easier to drink at home. People go to bars for the social atmosphere. They're there because they want to have fun with people. If you help them achieve that goal, they'll be glad to meet you.

jjboy91 · 2022-01-16T07:52:14+00:00

I can't pull this off like I would feel super weird being alone at my table when everyone around are with friends

rafr256 · 2022-01-16T13:18:43+00:00

I always think it’s weird for me to go to the bar and then I get there and realize no one cares.

Think about it, when I meet people who go to a bar alone my first reaction is respect

Scoliosissucks · 2022-01-16T14:40:51+00:00

I’ve done it. Depends where your going and where you live etc. I’ve made friends with the bartenders. It can be nice sometimes. Until creepy people bother you. That’s a whole other story

AnAngelOfVengeance · 2022-01-16T17:19:18+00:00

Better to roll solo and than to roll with shit wings that will try to steal your sets. Find the guys who run the place and make friends with them, ignore their girls at all costs. Finding a good guy wing is 10x harder than getting laid, but a good one will get you 50 girls over the course of your friendship with him.

BetEnvironmental1225 · 2022-01-16T06:42:02+00:00

I always use the

“can I pretend to be friends with you guys til my friends get here”

It’s great because you’ve given a reason for being on your own and also it’s easy for them to say yes because you will leave when your “friends get here”

thelambofdeth · 2022-01-16T02:53:25+00:00

Be good looking

spoolrek · 2022-01-16T04:40:39+00:00

my follow up question would be: what is the first thing you do once you arrive there?

ScorpioDaniel · 2022-01-16T07:55:14+00:00

If you are a beginner, get a wingman, and if your wingman is a hot/sociable female friend that's the best.

hookedonfonicsmunky · 2022-01-16T13:23:21+00:00

where you live? i need friends

dvidalm1983 · 2022-01-16T14:51:46+00:00

Tip 1 sit beside the bar Tip 2 order one drink after another Tip 3 get drunk Tip 4 call uber

Neil1398 · 2022-01-17T05:46:11+00:00

It’s actually normal tbh. I prefer to be alone, that way you’re in full control of talking to the girl. You can’t control how a girl feels about you’re wing.

You’re girl might be interested in you, but her friend may not be interested in you’re wing. Then it becomes a battle of finding the perfect set.

I had a pretty bad situation that happened yesterday. I was talking to a girl (girl A)in the bar and she was completely ignoring me, and my buddy was talking to the other(girl b). However, he said something that was directed at the both of them and it caught my girls attention. So now he’s talking to my girl and I’m talking to his girl.

Now we’re talking in a cross. So I slide him over to my old girl (girl a) and I talk to his old girl (girl b). Guess what happened, I winded up pulling girl b and it caused some friction between us because he wanted to pull together. Girl A was just not having any of our bullshit.

I say all this to say, I’m gonna be going out alone because I don’t want that happening again, and I feel like I’ve been winging and losing so many sets with my buddies because either they drop the ball, I fucked up, or the girls not into one of us.

It’s the only way for some real results. Unless you and you’re wing on the same page.

To answer you’re actual question though, go to the bar, get a drink or a water from the bartender and chop it up with people around you. This allows you to build a social circle within the club. People you can fall back on.

Then you can do some approaches but then keep building up you’re social momentum and value in the club by making friends with everyone.

Smile, dance and show good vibes, and people will see you’re having a great time. Girls will gravitate towards that and soon you’ll be getting signals. This allows you to make you’re approach easy.

Also can’t stress this enough and that’s to talk to guys as well. It helps you remain positive.

This is how I’ve done it when I was alone.

FarCombination7405 · 2022-01-20T17:56:04+00:00

Don’t!!! Or better yet do and walk next to the ugliest dude you can find

Title	Tips for going to bars alone?
Author	spartan-kick
Upvotes	25
Comments	36
Date	January 16, 2022 2:31 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/s5176a/tips_for_going_to_bars_alone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/tips-for-going-to-bars-alone.1268962 https://theredarchive.com/post/1268962

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