I'm not a coach, don't hit me up or anything. I'm just friends with a few coaches and we just spent some time talking about what their job is like.

There were lots of great things mentioned but the negative side was also very insightful.

In a nutshell....it's like you expect to just sit comfortably while they work magic on you.

That's what makes a lot of people who sign up for coaching weirdos.

Its like hiring a fitness instructor and expecting him to suffer through the workouts for you or hiring a dance instructor and expecting him to practice the choreography for you.

This conversation was between me and 3 dating coaches and something that they all had in common was repeat clients.

Clients that would work with them for a period of time, stop for a few months and then come back to work with them again.

But more specifically, the thing all 3 of them had in common was that when a client stops working with them, that client also stops putting himself out there, stops cold approaching, stops using dating apps, basically stops trying and only puts effort back in when they sign back up for coaching.

How fucked up is that? No wonder guys fail...and they actually have the audacity to blame the coaches and call them scammers??

I kept comparing them to fitness instructors in my mind and their stories made it sound like some guys needed to be dragged kicking and screaming to the gym and held at gunpoint to do their exercises....and yet they signed up, with their hard earned money to train or to be pushed into social situations outside their comfort zone!

That's what makes it so fucking weird. You fork over a significant amount of money but then you do everything in your power to avoid the thing you're paying for???

Its like the coaches care more about making your expense worth it than you, the actual person who forked over the money.

There are also lots of success stories but those are more from the guys who are proactive. Guys who don't need to be pushed to put in the work, guys who may have started out awkward and afraid to make fools out of themselves and at times do make fools out of themselves but sucked it up and pushed themselves to keep going anyway.

Guys who have the spirit but just didn't know what to do, how to correct their behaviour, and didn't know how to flirt and turn women on.

I'm just writing this because there is so much slander on this subreddit towards dating coaches and while some of it may be warranted, a lot of it is just unreasonable and lacking a ton of self-awareness.

And I'll say this, coach or not, if you keep slacking off and procrastinating, and blaming everything on your circumstances, your looks, using stuff like statistics as excuses, and blaming everyone else but yourself, then you'll never get to a point where you're truly satisfied with your dating life.