I'm homeless, alcoholic and no one cares

Ozhubdownunder · 2024-03-01T21:39:11+00:00

Thanks for reaching out. I am really sorry to hear what happened to you. Loosing everything. My suggestion to consider is don’t wait for people to care. Start practicing caring for yourself. Reaching out today is one version of self caring. Keep making small decisions that will support a recovery direction. Talk to homelessness services to find out what may be available, and free drug and alcohol services. You have skills at policing. Start self policing your drinking under the guidance of AOD help. Be a supportive policeman to yourself. Kindness, supportiveness, results oriented, etc. You need to take responsibility to practice care for yourself firstly, and then find people who will caringly support you.

MozartFan5 · 2024-03-01T20:47:48+00:00

Where do you live? Move to another state or country and restart your life there. Save up for a passport and move to Mexico then figure things out from there. It will be hard but you can do it with time and effort!

asf666 · 2024-03-01T20:57:49+00:00

I am a recovering addict myself. I'm sorry but there's no easy way out, you need to pull yourself out of that hole, nobody cares enough to help out.

Panskilicious · 2024-03-01T21:52:52+00:00

Get that last idea out of your head man. Life is worth living as a man, but given the fucked up situation you're in I see how you tend to think otherwise. I really respect that you're still here with us after all you've been through.

You definitely need to seek any professional help you can get to be able to climb out of that hole. I'm not sure how things work down in Australia so I can't really give you any advice on where to look, but if I were you I'd just ask Google or people in online groups from your area.

I pray for your recovery man, I really do. Much love from Germany!

Edit:

Here's 3 institutions I could find that help people experiencing homelessness and mental health crisis in Australia:

Euphoric_Document902 · 2024-03-01T22:15:39+00:00

I just don't want to be a weak man...

PsychoticCOB · 2024-03-02T00:53:18+00:00

Look, you don’t want to have a person like your ex wife beat you. Do not give her the satisfaction!!!! You are somebody, you deserve to be loved, you deserve peace. But this is going to be a rough patch and you need to take care of yourself in order to win this battle. You fight not just for yourself but every man who has faced similar accusations! You got this.

EarlPronk2 · 2024-03-02T00:00:17+00:00

My friend, this is not an easy thing you’re going to work your way out of, but you ARE gonna do it. Lots of good advice given already from other people posting.

The drinking part is probably going to be hardest but also the best payoff to figure out to then make everything else better.

ReddiThroway1979 · 2024-03-01T23:06:40+00:00

I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’ve been there and it’s hard to get out of. It’s almost impossible to get back on your feet without

A place to sleep, eat, shower.
A job

Some cities have programs which ask for a small amount of money/week and give you #1 but you need to be employed.

Your law enforcement background should translate well into a job as security, you could be a server at a restaurant and make good tips; anything.

Additional_Insect_44 · 2024-03-01T21:37:39+00:00

Are you able to join the army?

BiliLaurin238 · 2024-03-02T13:17:32+00:00

God the people in the comments are so nice. I hope their advice goes well for you, stay true king

BigChief302 · 2024-03-02T00:22:01+00:00

AA men's groups could get you a lot of support.

Imoldok · 2024-03-02T01:20:38+00:00

Find an AA group and join. I am blunt like a 2x4. You cannot do it here. You need the face to face.

BigCommercial5351 · 2024-03-02T05:07:54+00:00

Same boat different location USA same outcome I'm alone and took a meinless job with housing just to stay off the street and out of jail

Euphoric_Document902 · 2024-03-02T05:38:17+00:00

Why do people care that I was a NSW sheriff??? They think that just because I was an LEO therefore I dont experience any trauma... fuk all yalll... im gonna drink.... ffs I was a cop longer than I was a sheriff.... screw it... im done...

WolfInTheMiddle · 2024-03-02T12:10:36+00:00

I was falsely accused twice of harassment and bullying and discrimination, I was not allowed to defend myself in a meeting I was supposedly able to. They took away my roles I did at the company and with half the staff believing something about me I know not true I knew it was only a matter of time until they make another claim with no evidence that would finish me off, so I walked. Been messing with my head for a long time, it was a year and a half ago and like you I’m scared of not being able to move forward since I had been there for 7 years. I hope some of what people comment help you practically, no one should be put in a position where they end up homeless especially when they have served the community like you have.

Hound_of_Hell · 2024-03-02T14:33:58+00:00

I saw in the comments you’re from Australia. As a fellow Australian, I can completely relate to you. Sucks having hardly anywhere to go to. I hope you can dodge the false allegations, country is fucked at the moment. Everyone in this sub is here for you Mate

bluewebull · 2024-03-01T23:14:09+00:00

In challenging times, it's crucial to build your inner strength. Rely on your resilience and independence. Avoid being overly open about vulnerabilities, and navigate the dog-eat-dog world with a self-reliant mindset. Many face struggles, and acknowledging your own journey can lead to personal growth. I, too, was homeless in a foreign country, but I survived by relying on myself. Keep moving forward, and let your strength define your path.

Remember the words of Dr. Jordan Peterson, a motivational speaker known for his advice to men. He emphasizes the importance of taking responsibility for your life. "Clean your room" signifies starting with small, manageable tasks to regain control. Peterson urges men not to be victims, suggesting that life's hardships are opportunities for personal development. "Stand up straight with your shoulders back" is a metaphor for facing challenges head-on, displaying confidence. In the face of adversity, develop resilience and strive for excellence.

Additionally, Peterson advises against allowing drugs to control your mind. Take charge of your thoughts and decisions, maintaining control over your mind. By staying focused and avoiding substances that hinder your clarity, you empower yourself to face challenges with a clear and determined mindset.

77shantt · 2024-03-02T00:57:08+00:00

Man that’s rough. I don’t know what to say to you. Pull your self out of that hole. One thing I have learnt is no one’s cares man. I have had my accountant rip me lawyer , wife , false allegations , etc. learn to not give a fuck. This society is riden with feminism. Change your number etc

GSofMind · 2024-03-02T03:59:11+00:00

Is there a church community you can go to?

Johntoreno · 2024-03-02T04:28:49+00:00

The mark of a strong man is the one who perseveres through darkness&despair.

Friendly_Might_1348 · 2024-03-02T09:25:15+00:00

It's obvious the women will laugh at your situation. That's why you should NOT talk to women about it. You should talk to men. Of course it's not funny to lose everything because your ex-wife lied about you. Women will laugh at you because they don't understand what it's like for men out there and they won't until they'll start feeling the same way you feel. It may sound malicious but this way they'll understand that your situation is not a laughing matter

Dovahkin_Uchiha · 2024-03-01T23:44:59+00:00

A woman ruining an honorable man’s life… haven’t heard that one before. Oh yea when Eve f*cked over Adam.

Listen brother this is a story as old as time, idk what you believe in but turn to God. He saved my life. My ex of 3 years left me and I started drinking every single day. I became nihilistic and atheist. I got into the car one night not intending to come back. I miraculously survived a near fatal car crash. When you don’t have any strength in yourself, have strength in God. He will show you the way when there is no way. Thank you for your service to our country and you are an honorable man. I hope you pick yourself back up. Keep the faith

AirSailer · 2024-03-01T23:57:14+00:00

Not to be pedantic, but the key to stopping being an alcoholic is to not drink. It's a very easy thing to do, it's a very hard thing not to do. Hear me out. If you don't drink, you don't overdrink and you basically decrease your drinking frequency to zero. How do you not drink? You don't go to bars, you don't go to liquor stores or the beer section of grocery stores. You don't buy any alcohol whatsoever, you cut off anybody who drinks around you (or you ask them not to drink around you). You have to, in your mind, understand that you're not going to drink any more. Period.

I've gone through my own periods of heavy drinking, and I've cut back and now it's very managed, so I understand what it takes NOT to tell myself it will be just one more night of drunken bliss where the world seems OK then I'll stop. I also quit smoking cold turkey, when I made the decision in my mind that I wasn't ever going to have a cigarette again. It was like a literal light switch.

With your background in law enforcement, and leadership, you obviously have the wherewithall and fortitude to get though something like this. I'm in no way minimizing what you're going through, but I believe you can do what you need to do to put your life back in order.

Noobinpro · 2024-03-01T21:03:17+00:00

Here is your solution.

Quit drinking, get a PO box address, get a company paid CDL, live and work out of a truck, save, invest, watch what you eat and work out when possible, see the country and stop ruminating.

That's your few minutes of me caring while I take a shit. If you can't live your own life that is no one's problem but yours.

HansDevX · 2024-03-01T22:15:35+00:00

Your story sucks but ultimately and realistically people don't care about other people's problems (especially men's issues) and won't want to listen to any of it. Maybe in social media you'll get a couple of kumbayah and pity likes/upvotes but that's it. The guy that gave you a sensible suggestion to stop drinking and real life advice got downvoted and I'll get downvoted too :)

No_Finding_7970 · 2024-03-02T04:03:21+00:00

This is fake. Sherrifs in AUS are not LEO they are debt collectors essentially for the government

77shantt · 2024-03-02T00:59:13+00:00

What state you live in man ?

InPrinciple63 · 2024-03-02T01:47:53+00:00

How you are now is simply how you are now: it's not a statement about your manliness, worth or future, but the combined influences in your life that have brought you to this point. What happens to us is not solely about our own actions, but largely about external influences over which we have little to no control, so don't despair about the things we have no control over and concentrate on the things we do.

It takes a strong person to continue to survive under multiple stressors and I think you have demonstrated you are a strong man just by being here, still. But no man is an island and needs support.

General internet opinion seems to be that you don't need a fixed abode to receive JobSeeker: it may be possible to get an Aus Post office to act as that fixed address. However, JobSeeker may be difficult to access as it requires you to be actively looking for work and to accept whatever job is available, as well as attending any mutual obligation meetings, which I imagine could be problematic with an addiction.

Opinion is that there are organisations that can help with addiction as well as a GP. If you haven't already spoken to a GP about managing your circumstances and possible options to obtain financial support whilst doing so, it might be an idea to pursue that avenue. A GP should have access to additional support services, including counselling for PTSD and its associated addictions.

A divorce would have to be another candidate for PTSD and its tragic that such a process does not automatically include counselling for men since it is so prevalent (about 50% of marriages end in divorce).

I can't imagine how awfull your situation is, because I have been lucky enough not to have been caught up in the same situations and I don't live in the same State, so not sure whether I can be of help, but if you want to talk, I'm prepared to listen.

HSProductions · 2024-03-02T12:02:02+00:00

Www.SaultoPaul.org

Naughty-Spearfish · 2024-03-02T19:35:45+00:00

Damn, another PO who suffered from a witch's actions. I got fired from the MPS of London because of my ex too..

VinicioDario · 2024-03-02T21:55:02+00:00

Apologies for length. I REALLY hope u made it through the night. U still ARE someone. If u have a mental hospital near u, and have insurance I’d urge u to go. Start with the addiction. Be honest about what you’re dealing with. If you have insurance it could help keep u safe and they can detox u from it during ur stay(at least they can in the us). For quitting an addiction there’s a few things: avoid places, people that trigger it for u is one. But..it’s gunna be harder without someone trauma informed on ur side from what I can tell… even if u quit you will have to find help for the trauma..a lot of men don’t like therapy for good reason, but if u can do it see if there’s an EMDR therapist u can see, and try to stick with it and continue to not drink, continue to think about WHY u don’t want to.

ArcturasMooCow · 2024-03-02T22:47:03+00:00

Put the bottle down. You got screwed over but anything else at this point is wallowing. You need to get yourself together and that means making some touch choices. Get help with your addiction. Alcohol is a powerful drug so you're gonna have to get help to quit it. Everything in your life comes down to this moment. It doesn't matter what anyone thinks of you, you have value as a man. You're an ex cop so already know what you need to do. Your ex does not matter anymore. You've learned that women will betray you. Put yourself on the right path again. To God, everyone matters. Put the bottle down and get to work. You're not alone in your suffering. Be the man you need to be.

Cloudchaser47 · 2024-03-03T03:03:32+00:00

Volunteer when you can helping the homeless. This rut you're in is a spiritual one.

pmpdaddyio · 2024-03-04T03:24:04+00:00

I used to be someone... I was a police officer, then a sheriff and a good man.

I’m typically sympathetic to people struggling with addiction but the LE demographic brings such disdain to people in this position, I’m having a hard time sympathizing.

Title	I'm homeless, alcoholic and no one cares
Author	Euphoric_Document902
Upvotes	367
Comments	140
Date	March 1, 2024 7:43 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1b43f79/im_homeless_alcoholic_and_no_one_cares/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/im-homeless-alcoholic-and-no-one-cares.1246846 https://theredarchive.com/post/1246846

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