Just Be Yourself

TripleDigitNomad · 2024-05-25T20:57:21+00:00

It's not be yourself, it's be the most attractive version of yourself.

Being yourself if who you are is a fat slob who plays video games in your mom's basement all day isn't going to get you laid, my man.

Competitive-Ask4393 · 2024-05-26T02:14:53+00:00

Become the best version of you.

As in, if you’re a true introvert, don’t try learning vapid night time game. Stick to more quiet locations around topic.

And vice versa for extroverts.

Learn from people who are similar to you in temperament, but with a different outlook / traits you aspire to have. Pretend to be them and mimic said traits (what would … do?) until you’ve mentally become them, discard the garbage traits they have. You really only need to shift your personality 1% that’s it. Again don’t become them just absorb someone’s best traits like confidence, way with flirting etc, leave the rest.

Everyone is influenced by their environment whether we like it or not. It’s why we catch ourselves saying something our parents say or saying funny things that 1 old friend said.

“Just be yourself” is a trick to avoid growth and progress. Staying stationary in life which 90% of people do once they enter the workforce. Whole point is to keep making those shifts, push until it breaks, get pissed but see something from a different angle, reshift another 1% and keep moving. You need to make mistakes to become the person u wanna be.

IGetBoredSometimes23 · 2024-05-25T20:59:56+00:00

Agreed. Speaking from experience, if you change your personality to attract women, not only will you hate yourself if you do succeed at getting a woman to like you, but you'll end up attracting women that you don't want to be around and you'll be miserable.

Being yourself doesn't mean to show a date all the bad things about you. It's about showing the best version of yourself so you find someone compatible.

cougomdd · 2024-05-25T21:32:12+00:00

"please as much as possible" sorry

Latin-Suave · 2024-05-26T00:10:12+00:00

Fuck that. This is a very bad advice in dating game. Like everything in life, you have to work hard for everything you want in life. I would never have had a triple digit lay count if I followed that "be yourself" bull shit.

I worked hard, spent time and money in improving my appearance, my personality, my career and net worth. That is why I am doing better than 99% of dudes out there. I would never be 10% of my current self if I was just acting as myself.

coldhazel · 2024-05-26T09:03:54+00:00

Attractive people have lots of success dating. People ask them what their secret is and they respond "just be yourself." That's where that myth comes from.

If you want to accomplish anything challenging in life, you have to conform to what works. No one would tell you to learn sailing by "being yourself" or "being the most sailor version of yourself." Literally no challenge (learning: math, how to ride a motorcycle, investing, programming, whatever) suggests "being yourself" is a successful strategy.

Women chase guys at the top of social hierarchies. Once you train yourself to rise in social hierarchies, you'll find success with women. Once you've trained yourself on what works, then you can "be yourself." Because you've conformed yourself to what works, just as a man who has learned sailing, or wood working or whatever.

epimpstyle · 2024-05-25T22:36:03+00:00

What if a guy doesn't have the "qualities" to talk/joke with a girl? Is it wrong to copy someone else's jokes to make them feel good? If I see someone do a trick in a bar, is it wrong if I do the same trick and show it to my friends (or the woman I am talking to)?

Don't fool yourself, it's not possible to be yourself, because theoretically, people are always learning new things, and they're always improving.

appolonysian · 2024-05-25T23:30:11+00:00

Being yourself is great and all, but the issue with most dudes for which this advice doesn’t work with is that they have trouble being direct about their intentions/making moves and setting boundaries. Being yourself is great for building comfort and connection with similar people, but it’s not gonna suddenly have women making those moves happen. You still have to lead.

SaaSWriters · 2024-05-25T21:34:23+00:00

You have a point.

The trouble is, people don't know how to differentiate between who they are and the persona they think they must have.

creativedave73 · 2024-05-26T02:57:41+00:00

Be yourself, but you might need to change negative behavior to be more attractive. For instance, when I like a woman, my natural tendency is to want to spend a lot of time with her. Preferably in person, but I'll settle for texting or interacting on social media.

I realized that my behavior came across as very needy and was a turn off. The best thing I can do is have very brief interactions that are fun, flirty and sexual and wait for her to keep coming back to me.

atomant88 · 2024-05-25T22:27:50+00:00

Good advice. But I think most actual approaches to game already include it. The only people who tell you to lie and manipulate are people who don't understand game

Title	Just Be Yourself
Author	cougomdd
Upvotes	24
Comments	27
Date	May 25, 2024 8:47 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1d0l6yv/just_be_yourself/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/just-be-yourself.1519523 https://theredarchive.com/post/1519523

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