[fR] (fail report) - Gym fail

intjpua · 2011-01-28T18:29:16+00:00

The gym is a tough one. You can't be aggressive at all at the gym, because it'll creep people out. So, attraction has to build slowly and is probably going to have to be based mostly on your looks and eye contact.

Classes at the gym are slightly more social, and if you arrive early you can make chit chat with your neighbors, and you're likely to be heavily outnumbered by women at most classes. Again, though, you can't be too aggressive.

I simply won't do a completely cold approach at the gym. If I make eye contact and she doesn't give some indication I should approach, I'm not going to approach. If I can't make eye contact, I'm not going to approach. I'm probably missing out on opportunities occasionally, but I don't have to get every girl. There are millions of them, and I'll see others in easier circumstances.

glassuser · 2011-01-28T15:57:56+00:00

I don't like the gym for this reason. I'm there to work out (I take it somewhat seriously). Ill stop for the odd convo with a buddy, but Im there to work out, so Ill get right back into my session. In the lobby afterwards its all game, but during working out I dont really like to be bothered.

Im not sure what you other guys or girls think about this though.

Dont worry about the AA. There are plenty of other places to meet women. Shes one of many my man!

edited: grammar.

tryitonce · 2011-01-28T19:05:29+00:00

I used to have mixed feelings about this too, but then I met my current girlfriend of over 2 years at a gym.

Just think about it rationally...ITS 5 AM AND SHES AT THE GYM!!! Most superficial people dont have that kind of work ethic, even if they want that killer smoking body. I would take this as a hint that shes a motivated person who is interested in improving herself (most likely not just athletically). Since she's there at 5am that also probably means that she has stuff going on during the day (job, school, etc.) so you can place a good bet thats shes not a worthless bum. You've got all the makings of a kickass girl there! APPROACH HER!! You've got nothing to lose! Dont over think it or try and come up with a line! Just go up and ask how she is! Make a joke about coming in so early since thats something you already have in common that most dont! If shes not interested, then be nice and say that it was nice to meet her and no harm no foul, but seeing as shes probably as busy as the rest of us who go to the gym that early (I'm a 2 a day guy myself - 5:30 am and right after work) she might not be attached at the moment anyways. Please please please dont think its not worth the effort to try! I am so thankful that I made the move to talk to my girlfriend because I was so close to doing what you worte about. Carpe the hell out of that diem!!

privatejoker86 · 2011-01-28T20:24:13+00:00

Reminds me of this webcomic.

absolutebeginners · 2011-01-28T17:17:37+00:00

Really, if you are having AA still, trying to get girls who are busy working out AND have headphones on to converse with you is probably gonna be pretty hard.

madcaesar · 2011-01-28T21:14:25+00:00

I've approached girls at the gym in the past and have had success, however, it took massive amounts of balls as you said...but then after I did it...It was like taking 3 shots of cocaine or something, because your adrenaline just goes though the roof. I dunno why but it was a fucking rush, to the point where I did it like every day to a different girl... I get a number every time, and a date. The only date I didn't get was if she had a BF.

The way I did it was when they were on low a intensity exercise...like if they were stretching, or grabbing a drink of water, or just getting on a treadmill.

So it can be done, you just have to time it right I guess and like I said, something about it being so in the open and unexpected gave me huge rushes :)

djmykeski · 2011-01-28T17:52:03+00:00

It was definitely the voice in your head that killed this approach. I knew you wouldn't approach after I read the sentence, "I start thinking of what I could do or say..." I understand the feelings of AA because you're in a gym and you're there to work out, therefore, you may not be in state or even be thinking about pickup at the time. I gotta admit, though, I never EVER regret approaching a woman, but I DO regret not approaching. Some of the really hot ones that I didn't approach in my early days still haunt me, because I continue to think, What if I had???

Rather than hesitating and trying to image what you're going to say to her and how the conversation will go, you should train yourself so that your first instinct is JUST Approach. Don't think about it, just approach. I trained myself by practicing for months on sticking to the 3 second rule as much as possible. The concept of the 3 second rule was designed EXACTLY for this reason, when you see an attractive girl, you start to come up with things in your head on what you will say, how the conversation will go, what she will say, how you will respond to that, but then you'll start to imagine what if she says this, what if she says that, what if, and then suddenly doomsday scenarios start to creep in your head and you just say screw it, I won't approach this one. But for all you know, she's dying for some cock and this is the HB8.5 that you could be fucking next week.

Your first instinct when you see a super HB should be, "Oh man I gotta go talk to this girl RIGHT NOW." And without hesitation you just go.

Don't think. Just approach.

mPUA_2B · 2011-01-28T20:50:33+00:00

I'd fold my arms and smile

Folding your arms is closed off defensive body language.

robaroo · 2011-01-28T20:21:12+00:00

"I like your style." does that really work? it's so generic. template comment.

mPUA_2B · 2011-01-28T20:26:27+00:00

The gym sucks, in my opinion. Rather than being dressed nicely for a night trying to get picked up, girls are sweaty and unattractive looking, and more self-conscious about their appearance. They're there not because of how good they look, but because of the things they don't like about themselves, like a few extra pounds.

That, and there's always the chance that they'll think you're a pervert by watching them work out.

mPUA_2B · 2011-01-28T17:58:43+00:00

Probably better that you didn't, don't bother people during their workout.

VernacularJazzyGeoff · 2011-01-29T00:49:12+00:00

So... Perhaps the win here is about defining boundaries.

fluentinsilence · 2011-01-29T01:57:53+00:00

I make it a general rule for myself never to hit on anyone at the gym; I find it to be pretty tacky. Even if someone might be craving some attention, I think for the most part everyone just wants to finish their workout.

I use my school gym and there is a girl on the school's rowing team that goes there almost as often as I do; I'm quite taken by her, but I'll never speak to her inside those walls. I'd have to catch her on the outside.

cousindupree · 2011-01-29T05:28:27+00:00

The game at the gym can work but it has to be done differently.

Imagine this: Before a class you are stretching next to your target. If she will make eye contact, say something like, "Wow, I'm a little tired today." Judge her interest level. She might reply that she's tired too or if her interest level is high, she might ask why you are tired. If she says that she's tired too, ask her why she's so tired. "Heavy date last night?" (maybe not - calibrate; discern)

etc....

Dupree

2011-01-29T15:53:12+00:00

That is a textbook way of becoming known as the creepy guy at the gym.

You really need to make any conversations there way way way more natural, as women don't generally go to the gym to be picked up, especially when its not done smoothly.

I basically watched a guy doing exactly what you were proposing to do at the gym a while back and there was a collective wtf from the bystanders and the woman, as it could not have been more awkward.

I'm not saying you shouldn't try to meet people at the gym, but you have to be way more subtle and friendly. Interrupting her workout to pay an awkward compliment is not a recipe for success, and if you do this regularly, you may find yourself having a chat with the gym mgmt.

over9000 · 2011-01-28T20:41:42+00:00

The gym is a place to workout, not to pick up chicks.

1hrowaway · 2011-01-28T15:52:51+00:00

It is the voice in your head! How I wish I had a mute button for that

VentedWideMouth · 2011-01-28T19:53:56+00:00

your approach anxiety was the smart half of your brain getting you to sit this one out. don't bother girls at the gym! please, and thank you.

Title	[fR] (fail report) - Gym fail
Author	mPUA_2B
Upvotes	25
Comments	51
Date	January 28, 2011 3:47 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/fas0a/fr_fail_report_gym_fail/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/fr-fail-report-gym-fail.1315010 https://theredarchive.com/post/1315010

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