Should I be concerned about reliability/lack of clear plan for the future, or let it go?

ladida1321 · 2021-08-17T18:15:30+00:00

It’s only been 2.5 months so I actually find the baby names thing in front of your mom weirder and more concerning than the rest of it.

With this little amount of information it doesn’t seem like he’s very sure of what he wants.

You’re right to question how reliable he is. But at the same time it’s literally been 2.5 months- I would stick it out a bit more and just mention these things when they come up (not in a nagging way) but “you don’t have to say you’re going to call if you can’t. I would rather not have to wait for a call that isn’t coming”

“We don’t need to talk about baby stuff yet since we have only been together a short time”

Trust your gut. Something is a “little off”- but it could be his own relationship anxiety too. I don’t think it would be out of line to just ask him about it and make it clear you’re not trying to rush things either. Maybe there is just a miscommunication happening.

orangerose18 · 2021-08-17T18:23:58+00:00

It sounds like future faking — might be trying to make you more attached than you should by playacting about house and babies, but not actually having those intentions. I think a general rule of thumb is that a man will make his intentions clear — they tend to be much more direct than women. If he’s not direct, then he isn’t sure of his own intentions, and that’s a major turn off.

LilCinnamonRoll_ · 2021-08-17T18:25:36+00:00

He doesn’t sound like he’s passing the vetting system to me.

LightOverWater · 2021-08-17T20:33:57+00:00

Have you sat down and expressed this to him? Rather than make assumptions based off mixed signals you need to talk with him about your future together, each other's goals, and make it clear that this is important to you.

variebaeted · 2021-08-17T20:37:17+00:00

Nope. If he can’t manage to call you later when he said he would, I wouldn’t have a lot of faith. Doesn’t seem reliable or interested enough. He’s not ready for what you want.

jzdelona · 2021-08-17T18:41:46+00:00

If your instincts are telling you to ask if this guy is sus then I think you know your answer. He could be love bombing you with the baby talk so soon and his game is starting to slip a bit ignoring your calls and bumming money off of you.

_player_0 · 2021-08-17T18:49:39+00:00

It seems like you're ahead of him maturity-wise. He may be a good guy but you're in different stages of life. You may have to wait a while if you decide to work with him.

LateralThinker13 · 2021-08-18T15:26:39+00:00

Have him do Jordan Peterson's Future Authoring Program. Maybe get it for him as a gift. He may surprise himself with the future he'd like, and it will help him develop a road map to getting there.

JulesB954 · 2021-08-17T19:07:21+00:00

What was the context of you giving him money and then him forgetting to pay you back? In most cases (there are exceptions) masculine men wouldn't dare accept money from a woman they are seeing. Unless he got robbed and was stranded somewhere, this sounds like a red flag.

SDgirlburner · 2021-08-17T19:34:08+00:00

The baby name thing seems like he will talk about it in front of family to get them off his back but he’s right 2.5 months is a bit early to be planning baby names. Let it ride for 6 months but look at him objectively, don’t get more attached and start assessing if he makes more concrete plans with you as that 6 months get closer. You may just be a place holder til he’s ready and finds some one he can “see himself doing that with.”

Title	Should I be concerned about reliability/lack of clear plan for the future, or let it go?
Author	rosesonthefloor
Upvotes	26
Comments	28
Date	August 17, 2021 5:25 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/p68atx/should_i_be_concerned_about_reliabilitylack_of/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/should-i-be-concerned-about-reliabilitylack-of.1058245 https://theredarchive.com/post/1058245

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