Been almost 2 years since my divorce and I’m still not past it . I was trying to be the best man I could possibly been and she cheated on me with her coworker

BlessedAFx777 · 2022-01-21T10:24:32+00:00

#metoo

MrKatUK · 2022-01-21T13:01:16+00:00

My man. I feel you.

Life gets easier when you change your mindset. Keep telling yourself that she made that choice. Not you.

Once your mind gets over that saving the relationship was out of your control, it gets easier. I feel you though bro

BurnDownTheMission68 · 2022-01-21T09:17:09+00:00

What is so counter intuitive about relationships is that when a man tries so hard to be Mr. Modern, Perfect, I’ll-Clean-The-House-Honey, he ends up turning her off.

She doesn’t want a man that makes her happiness his goal.

We fill men full of lies about how they should behave, men dutifully obey and she still bangs Steve from Sales.

patently_pleasant · 2022-01-21T12:42:03+00:00

I feel you, brother. It’s been one year for me and things have gotten a ton better, but I still bear the scars from it and I have trust issues. I always did my best to treat her well. I completely took care of her. I had a nice job and told her she could take some time off during the summer of 2020 when the pandemic first boomed and things got scary (she worked in a high risk environment). She used that time to meet a new guy, have a blossoming relationship with him, hook up several times, and then ultimately leave for him only a few months into marriage. She even invited him to the wedding. Women will say they want a nice guy, but then they will treat him like shit in return. Spend that energy being nice to yourself instead

Mavik52 · 2022-01-21T12:42:02+00:00

Perhaps you are not yet the best version of yourself that you can be. You need to cultivate a high level of self love and respect for yourself. At the end of the day why would you desire someone who doesn't desire you? If she didn't appreciate the man you are, there are thousands of other women who will. Her loss.

crowexplorer · 2022-01-21T17:49:09+00:00

Once you accept that true love is a myth, and women are as always looking for the best deal, you will never be surprised again and will find peace.

Orlando1701 · 2022-01-21T15:52:25+00:00

My ex tried to make me feel bad all through our process but within a year of us divorcing I’d lost 15lb, was on 1/4 of the mood stabilizers I had been, got moved from twice a week individual therpy to once a week group, and my blood pressure dropped 20pts. Being married was literally killing me. She’ll try to make everything your fault but it never is.

Lonely_Fondant · 2022-01-21T17:12:58+00:00

You have to recognize that you’re going through a process of grieving, and that takes time. Unfortunately no one can say how long it will take, everyone is different. But calling it grief out loud and talking about it as such is helpful, at least it was for me.

ElectroDeviant · 2022-01-21T22:56:23+00:00

Go buy these books: The Unplugged Alpha by Richard Cooper and The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi. They will help you understand the why and move forward with the recovery process. God Speed my friend.

WartimeDad · 2022-01-21T13:40:36+00:00

Exercise and meditation. Learn how to reduce thoughts and feelings related to that trauma.

whatskeeping · 2022-01-21T20:10:44+00:00

Mee too. Sometimes I think of her and I wonder why. I've heard it's because it becomes habitual and your brain just wanders there. When it happens tell yourself no and think of something else.

RX8JIM · 2022-01-21T16:11:12+00:00

Same

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#metoo