*Added update in the comments because Reddit keeps giving error when trying to add it here.

Mission: Generally, I see that my mission is to glorify God by personally being conformed to his image by his grace. Raising children and passing on values and the gospel to them is what God has called me to. In work, my mission is to help people learn how to market their businesses in a way that is highly efficient and effective. I need a woman’s help with the producing of children and the raising of children. That family environment creates financial necessity which then fuels my pursuit of high value marketplace services.

Spiritual: very knowledgeable about practical theology. Active in church. Pray all throughout the day. I do share the gospel, but pray for strength to share more.

Stats: Lifting 5-6 times a week while doing BJJ 1-2x a week.

5’11”, 193.5lb, BF% 12-13% Bench: 275lbs, Squat: 315lbs DL: 375lbs OHP: 185lbs

Finances: High earning. Over $300k and able to move up. We have debt, but plans in place to pay it off.

Diet is pretty good. Very little junk, but I eat what I want and watch calories when shredding.

Read: NMMNG, SGM, WISNIFG, TSM, TMMSLP

The question:

How should one handle when their wife likes to bring your family members into situations?

I will preface with that I don’t always wrestle with her on this point, but she has PMDD (which is basically an extreme form of PMS) and around two weeks before her period she has a bout of emotional insanity for several days, pretty much every month.

I’ve commanded her to not bring family members into our relationship because it’s not healthy, but here I am.

I should state that she is not close with her family because they are not emotionally healthy and tend to push each other away.

My family is very open and close.

For more situational insight, here’s a most recent scenario:

We went to my parents after church. I wanted to drop her and the kids off so I could grab stuff from home. She asked me to grab her a few things, including ingredients to make an alcoholic drink.

I went home to get my stuff, and grab her stuff as well. I also brought her gluten-free pizza that she bought the night before, despite her not asking since I figured she’d be hungry and has limited gluten free options at my parents’.

When I got back she saw the ingredients to make the drink she wanted and quickly said “you know I’m not making that drink. You’re going to make it for me right?” in a somewhat bratty tone.

I ignored her.

Later, I asked her to grab me have a piece of her pizza. (Quick note on this pizza…the night before she had gotten very snarky about me ordering only one and not also this other Hawaiian pizza for her in addition, despite her detailing she wanted the one I ordered and not the other. When she thew a fit then, I asked her to leave the restaurant. She calmed down and “behaved” for after that.

Back to the story: She then said she would if I made her a drink. I said, “no, how about you go inside and heat me up a piece of pizza and I don’t make you a drink.”

My 14 year old feminist sister heard this and balked, which my wife then fed into with agreement, giggling.

I got up and said, “I’m going to the gym” , then went to heat up the pizza myself. She then met me at the door and said she might want the piece because it was the last piece and she might still be hungry.

I said, “are you still hungry?” in a firm voice. She waffled back and forth eventually saying yes, so I gave it to her and walked towards the car.

Once I got to the car I remembered that I had brought a workout sled so I could do that in the yard.

After I do that for about 20 mins she brings the pizza out which was now cold.

I said I don’t want a cold pizza. She then took it, heated it up and brought it to me and then continued to try to justify her actions and reconcile. This wouldn’t be so bad, but my brother was standing right there and she was roping him in.

So, I asked her to talk to me alone. Basically she refused. She then went to talk to my mom and dad about the whole thing.

At this point I was ready to get the kids in bed, so I went to round them up. She’s talking with my parents about how “aggressive” I’m being so I just told her to go stay somewhere else for the night.

She starts freaking out and crying.

About 30 mins later, as I’m getting the kids in the car, they start asking where mommy is, so I go in and say to her “hey, I think it would be best to come home for the kids stability. She agreed, but I then said, “I just need you to know that you coming home doesn’t mean that we’re ok after all this”.

She freaks out and starts crying saying that she doesn’t feel safe with me. My mom and dad are in the same room, btw, watching this all unfold. I didn’t yell, just asked her why she’d accuse me of being dangerous as I’ve never hurt her, implying that she’s trying to make a scene in front of my parents.

So, I pack up the kids besides one who wants to stay at my parents’ with her and head home.

I currently feel a bit overstimulated by the whole thing, so I’m trying to not think emotionally. Hence, me being here.

Looking forward to replies. Thanks!