I’m new here and need advice re: dating while separated

xosto · 2023-07-19T00:06:08+00:00

Every lawyer will advise against it. It turns amicable divorces bad fast. It's an emotional process. Logic will not prevail.

Even in no fault states it can be viewed poorly especially if you're in a community property state and you spend money dating. They'll pull your financials.

Not sure where you're finding women ready to date a separated by divorced man, but more power to you if they're any good. Most will pass on you until you're fully divorced.

BosPatriot71 · 2023-07-19T00:59:17+00:00

Reel it in, cowboy. For a little while at least.

JamieMadrox2020 · 2023-07-19T01:24:02+00:00

How are you able to date separated/before divorce is final? Not because of any emotional hang ups but how are your dates tolerating it? Seems like it would be a huge disqualified for women. Or are the more understanding about complicated life situations as they get older?

QuietVisitor · 2023-07-19T01:58:07+00:00

Marylander here. The state no longer requires a one year separation… I believe it changed 2018 or 2019. If you both mutually consent, you can get divorced right away.

Bluetoes1 · 2023-07-19T02:40:20+00:00

If you expect a difficult divorce, you might want to wait. Lawyers will tell you that you need to be chaste for leverage in the divorce. I learned this the hard way, wife who was having affair found out I was talking to a woman and lied her ass off to get my lawyers to scold me and not use her affair in court. (“You are both the same” - can come up.

Reflog1791 · 2023-07-19T14:37:08+00:00

Do not marry the first to give you a beej. Don’t bond with anyone over your divorce trauma. Stay away from single moms. Don’t get anyone pregnant.

A divorcing man is vulnerable to get caught up in another toxic relationship.

“I’m not looking for anything exclusive at this time” is the phrase that pays.

captainchippsixx · 2023-07-18T23:21:37+00:00

Just keep everything to your self. But soon as your out there her friends will see your profile. So be careful what you put in it.

Separated and not living together I hope.

IAmOculusRift · 2023-07-18T23:19:23+00:00

Is Maryland a “no fault” state?

Ptsdveterannavy · 2023-07-19T00:47:41+00:00

Man date and do what you do undercover if you feel you can't control the sex desires. If you can don't worry about hiding and if you can't, be incognito

Dangerous_Item_6879 · 2023-07-20T11:34:33+00:00

You can start dating but you need to be super stealthy about it.

Cash payments for meals, drinks, events, hotels.

Don’t let anyone meet your kids.

Don’t tell any mutual friends you and your stbxw have together about anyone you are dating.

Imagine her attorney and private investigator doing everything they can to prove that your spent martial money outside the marriage. Then have a plan to make sure they cannot gather any evidence on you.

Make sure you stay focused on the long term goal.

Title	I’m new here and need advice re: dating while separated
Author	RidethatTide
Upvotes	6
Comments	17
Date	July 18, 2023 11:09 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/153dl9h/im_new_here_and_need_advice_re_dating_while/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/im-new-here-and-need-advice-re-dating-while.1225711 https://theredarchive.com/post/1225711

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