It's sooo damn hard to resist when a girl shows interest

_Bene_Gesserit_Witch · 2023-10-16T08:58:15+00:00

Look up attachment styles, you seem to have the avoidant one. People with avoidant attachment tend to attract people with anxious attachment, and the dance begins. I think a lot of things will click into place for you.

Electronic_West_1831 · 2023-10-16T09:18:14+00:00

How awful that women are showing interest in you; my heart truly bleeds - please allow me to consul you by playing a tune on my tiny violin

MarBitt · 2023-10-16T10:05:31+00:00

Zen story:

The disciples were immersed in heated debate when the master approached them. "What did you discuss?" he asked.

"We talked about how much we suffer from being chased by the desires of the flesh."

The master laughed, “You're not that far yet. For now, it is you who are chasing the desires.”

Schmurby · 2023-10-16T10:50:58+00:00

Follow the path of least resistance, friend.

If a girl likes you and you like her back just go with it, dude. It’s not like you have to get married.

For the love of Christ, don’t cut your balls off.

TheRedPillRipper · 2023-10-16T10:31:34+00:00

it puts my heart in a race.

I love that feeling. That excitement. Fear. Trepidation. Anticipation. Expectation. Hope. Absolutely love it.

Godspeed and good luck!

MidoriEgg · 2023-10-16T10:28:38+00:00

Is a friends with benefits situation not an option maybe?

MxMaster9907 · 2023-10-16T10:33:05+00:00

Jesus, wtf

_Ad_Astra_Abyssosque · 2023-10-16T09:27:53+00:00

I wish i still felt this way. I haven't felt butterflies since high school. It always takes me significantly longer to like a woman than her to like me.

RuggedIndividualist7 · 2023-10-16T09:53:04+00:00

For lonely guys, yup.

thedarkracer · 2023-10-16T09:15:25+00:00

It is, loneliness does that to you. Male loneliness is a term which women will never understand for sure. Being alone can never be cherished. Take it from someone who has been alone more than you.

AutoModerator · 2023-10-16T08:37:42+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

throwaway164_3 · 2023-10-16T11:15:21+00:00

Friends with benefits is the way

A good sex session helps clear the biological mist lol

PsychicImperialism · 2023-10-16T11:44:32+00:00

I cherish being alone. I cherish my freedom to do what I want. I love how things "don't matter". I cherish not being responsible for a wife and kids. Every time I was in a relationship, the only thing I got out of it was anxiety, agony and heartbreak. I felt chained down to the Earth, and I always felt so guilty about the things I did wrong. I want none of that anymore.

This is quite honestly why situationships really exist. If you can have an independent lifestyle and do ok, what you quickly realize is that most romantic relationships require sacrificing a lot of your time and often some of that feeling of being free as well. This is especially true if you aren't emotionally needy and don't need constant affirmation, attention, reassurance, and clingyness. Whole segments of the population need the opposite and will be keen to get clingy and emotionally demanding fast.

People are flawed, so even if you get along great with someone and are compatible with them, they're often still going to have their things that require that you sacrifice some of your independent lifestyle even if they seemed fine with it. And as the relationship progresses, if it progresses, you'll be sacrificing more and more, since compromise and doing things for each other is a vital part of any relationship. This in and of itself isn't a problem in an ideal world, because you'd be able to choose that, however in reality people often show up to relationships with unspoken expectations. It's also in the nature of most relationships where you get along well with someone to progress into a more interconnected status, which is how people find themselves unexpectedly swamped and not feeling free when they intended the opposite.

The bad news is most people cannot maintain situationships well without progressing the relationship, since the reality is that it requires you to be cold with your boundaries and tell someone how it is with you. You end up having to break up with people for their own good, because people will straight up lie to you hoping to change your decision and break their own hearts after months of silently hoping you were the one for them. Otherwise you end up in unethical situations where the person you're with is obviously in love, and you're just maintaining what things are because that's all you want, and surprise surprise that's what a lot of people do, which is why there's so much complaining about situationships and so much drama over them.

But I digress and return to my original point. It is why situationships exist. If you're young, healthy, and comfortably independent, it is simply more liberating in life to not have a restrictive relationship status, because people who match well with your independent lifestyle and respect it while being romantically interested in you are more rare. 99% of everyone will want to do the cliche domestic lifestyle with you no matter how things start out.

And yet, whenever a girl shows interest, it puts my heart in a race. My knees feel weak. I feel magnetically drawn. I almost can't resist the overwhelming urge to pursue it. Pulling myself away from it is a struggle.

It's just about self control and deciding what you want. There's no real replacement for that. You're in control and you make your own decisions, so if you go sleep with someone or date someone you think is bad for you, that's really just about your self control. You might want to see how women deal with it, as I see a lot more advice between women for this kind of thing than I see for men. Feeling that chemistry is healthy and natural. Just apply self control over it.

Title	It's sooo damn hard to resist when a girl shows interest
Author	opolomoneima
Upvotes	13
Comments	25
Date	October 16, 2023 8:37 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1791ajd/its_sooo_damn_hard_to_resist_when_a_girl_shows/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/its-sooo-damn-hard-to-resist-when-a-girl-shows.1235291 https://theredarchive.com/post/1235291

Comments