Struggling

RichardCleveland · 2024-02-20T17:17:01+00:00

Can you move back? I would get the fuck as far away from her as possible, and re-connect with friends if you can. (obviously it's easier said than done sometimes)

denvercaniac · 2024-02-19T15:33:27+00:00

If possible, save as much as you can. Look into online or inexpensive schooling.

DivorceRecoveryMen · 2024-02-19T14:53:45+00:00

What are some of the positives in you life now. You probably can't see them because of the anger. Concentrate on the positives and over time, the anger will dissipate. Work on yourself to move on and accept your new positive reality.

Left-Signature-5250 · 2024-02-19T04:59:46+00:00

The anger will just dissipate with time, I can promise you that. Thought I would hate her forever. One year later, I just don't think about her a lot. And when I do, it is either about how glad I am that I don't have to deal with her shit anymore or idle flashes of "why did I even get with or trust such a shit person in the first place?" to which there will obviously never be an answer.

Believe me, for what she has done to me (severely financially crippled, will never really be able to recover), I should be perpetually angry. But it just somehow got less and less. We have two kids for which I am paying a boatload and only see every 2-3 weeks also due to her heartless scheming. She just moved them two hours away to her affair partner. That was never agreed but here in my Country it was absolutely within her rights.

I guess its true what they say about time healing all wounds. Just give it time. Concentrate on your hobbies and health.

Enough_Youth_4564 · 2024-02-19T04:22:35+00:00

One month into this process and I’m realizing how blessed I am that she actually decided to leave. I’m done with her drama, her addiction to the Real Housewives , her selfishness, and her emotional burden. In all honesty, unless the woman was the main provider to the man, a divorce can always be a true bliss. More time for you , more quality time for you with your children (depends on their age and what resources you can have) and less financial/emotional liability.

Just write her off your mind quickly: let go of all the emotional memories, these are a distraction. Cut her off your life and move on.

Heavy_Guitar_4848 · 2024-02-19T03:15:13+00:00

I’m super excited about the next phase of life. Just getting away from that terrible energy has had a positive effect on my life. I enjoy the little random conversations and little things in life now. Once in a while I’ll let the bitter thoughts in but mostly have good days now. Hope you hang in there and get to that point too .

IllustriousCry672 · 2024-02-19T03:02:47+00:00

I can relate. My ex said she cheated on me because 'I made my life all about her' meaning I did exactly what you did. Wanted to quit her job, I worked harder so she didn't have too. Didn't want to do chores, so I did all those too and hired out what I couldn't. Wanted to go on fancy vacations more than we should, and I made it happen. Wanted to eat out all the time, so we did and didn't save money. Wanted to spend bonus's on brand name stuff, so I did.

I've found doing everything your wife wants to be about as big a life mistake as you can make.

MidniteOG · 2024-02-19T02:29:13+00:00

Personally I’ve been hitting the gym. Hard. It’s a good escape, and a positive out. Problem is, when I drive home it’s still empty. Best of luck

the-indigo-king · 2024-02-19T01:28:37+00:00

Fix up your knee. Make your money. Live your life.

Don't give people things they aren't willing to get for themselves, was my lesson.

Title	Struggling
Author	sulivan1977
Upvotes	20
Comments	14
Date	February 19, 2024 12:51 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1aua8f8/struggling/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/struggling.1245802 https://theredarchive.com/post/1245802

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