I am short, fat, ugly, and 19. Help me lose my virginity within the next 3 months.

TuckerBishop · 2014-02-14T21:58:31+00:00

Please replace that 3-month goal.

Instead, focus on what you're talking about, you (not that semi-attractive girl you're talking about, who I fear might be a one-itis). Make your goal to lose x amount of weight within 3 months. Exercise daily.

Also, because you're interested in pickup, you'll want to level-up your communication skills. Give yourself a reachable goal that will make you more social. Make super small tiny goals, such as talking with one stranger (about anything). It doesn't matter if it's a male or female in the beginning. Just get out there.

If you heed this advice and focus on those two goals, everything else will fall into place for you. Feel free to make reachable goals in other parts of your life (such as doing better at work or school, if you need to).

HappyJerk · 2014-02-14T21:59:50+00:00

Setting goals like "I must get laid in 3 months" is a recipe for disaster.

First of all, 5'8 is not that short. You're not ugly either. You just need to go to the gym and get all these negative thoughts about yourself out of the head.

2014-02-14T23:07:32+00:00

Lose weight by diet and exercise
Read a bunch of books and articles on how to be more social and friendly
Talk to everyone like they've been your friend for years
Since you're fat it probably makes you seem short. 5"8' is fine bro
Don't ask "how can I get laid?" Ask "how can I become a guy that girls want to have sex with?"
Get rich. Women like rich guys.

bl1y · 2014-02-14T23:00:01+00:00

Alright champ, I know you're giving yourself 90 days, but there's only 2 days in that entire time period that are relevant. Today, and tomorrow.

What have you done today? What are you going to do tomorrow?

I seriously want you to answer those questions, type them out, hit reply, because how you answer them will show you how the next 90 days are going to go.

RandianHero · 2014-02-14T21:55:13+00:00

You're not that short, in all honesty. My best friend is 5'6'', 180lbs, balding, and blessed with a face uglier than a cat's anus. He learned a long time ago that he wasn't going to get anywhere based on his looks, so he developed a ridiculously awesome wit and sense of humor. Everything that comes out of his mouth is hilarious and perfectly timed, and that's granted him incredible confidence. The guy gets laid even more than I do -- and I'm attractive.

So my advice to you is to follow suit: be witty. Be funny. Be interesting. That'll give you the confidence you need to be successful.

MrMomow · 2014-02-15T01:08:44+00:00

I'm 5'5 and i've had guys offer to pay me to teach them pickup. I dig tall chicks and go for them all the time.

It's just a limiting belief. Also, remove that 3 month goal. This is lifelong improvement, no magic pill.

remarkedvial · 2014-02-14T23:27:28+00:00

Fuck 3month goals, it's too easy to procrastinate, you need daily goals.

Challenge yourself to make small talk with a cashier at a store tomorrow.

Challenge yourself to smile at 5 attractive women on the street the next day.

Etc.

infernalsatan · 2014-02-14T22:40:49+00:00

5'8" is not short at all. Get a hooker and get this nonsense over.

Fatmuffin · 2014-02-14T22:28:23+00:00

Go to the gym dude, a lot . Exercise and don't leave until you feel like you have had a tough work out. You will gain more confidence in yourself and talking to women will be easier. Another tip is don't just talk to girls to get laid. Talk to them just to talk to them. Text them, do whatever just become comfortable when talking to them. Its really nice that you want to change. The last tip would be to eat VERY healthy. Like every meal have a fruit or vegetable and for snacks eat things like celery and a little peanut butter.

ThrowawayPUA · 2014-02-14T23:12:44+00:00

Start by reading the links the sidebar.
If you expect other people to help you, you have already failed. Help yourself. Nobody can do this for you.

casper198198 · 2014-02-15T19:13:37+00:00

Few quick notes to start off as someone in your position:

Develop a sense of style if you dont already have one, AND DONT GO TO REDDITS MALE FASHION ADVICE page.
On nights where I do the best, is when I have spent to day talking to lots of people. Its like training your brain to have faster reaction speed with more wit. If you stay in all day on the computer not using your words you perform terribly.
Talk talk talk, TO EVERYONE ABOUT EVERYTHING. Don't come off as over eager though "OH LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT THIS, OH WAIT AND THIS, OH AND THIS", slow and smooth. (plus it gives you more time to think of what to say next)
loose that weight, it'll improve your image of yourself.
When at the gym, WORK OUT YOUR BACK MUSCLES. In our day and age, we all develope "Iphone neck" from looking at phones and screens all day. This also has to do with the fact that our chest muscles are more worked out than the back (opposing) muscles. You get your back in shape and roll your shoulders back so your are less hunched, stand straight with chest out, you breath better and look better.
Be thankfull you are a guy, as girls tend to not care too much if your not good looking so long as you are funny and witty. One of my best mates does SO well with honeys and is maybe a 5.
Have a good mind state, dont think of yourself as an ugly looser, just front to yourself like your the king and can get maaaaad honeys, it'll come out in your demeanour.
If you hear any good lines and I dont mean corny pickup lines "are you and angel, because..." I mean witty lines that can apply anywhere E.g. "YO WAXJACKET, HOW YOU DOING MAN!?" , "good man, chillin like a villain" or "chillin most, playin the host, coast to coast man" aha I know it sounds stupid but little witty rhymes are hilarious and make you stand out from the crowd as a more interesting person.
READ A LOT, increasing the diversity of your vocabulary is a really useful tool. Coherent and elegant verbal skills are a big turn on for girls. Dont over do it though.
Get drunk when you're out but beyond your second or third (depending on how light weight you are) drink, have a glass of water inbetween. Itl keep your cool, stop your from sweating and you will be drunk but not dehydrated so not a sloppy / more in control.
At the gym, run for 15 minutes before every work out. Work out 2-3 times a week, more if you can, and each work out day vary the muscles you target. After running, do maybe 4 - 5 pairs of exercises. In one pair, use high weights (make sure u can handle it though) and do 8 reps of the one exercise, then 8 of the other in the pair. Repeat two more time. so (8 x 2) x 3. do that for the 5 pairs of exercises. 1 hour before the gym, you need a little bit of carbs (1 slice of brown bread) a bit of protein (ORGANIC crunchy peanut butter) and 1 banana for the potassium energy release. Up to 45 minutes right after workout have a protein shake high in protein with a smaller preportion of carbs. This will make the workout more efficient.
get a classy cologne, and use it often so you develop a signature smell to those girls you see often. if it is an "Eau de Cologne" it will be strong but wont last long so maybe 1 spray. If it is a "Eau de toillette" it will be weaker but will last longer so maybe 2 or 3 sprays. SPRAY ONTO BARE CHEST. and if the Eau de toillette, maybe 2 on the chest and 1 ontop of outfit. Look for a classy expennsive type if you can save the money, This is a really nice eau de toillette and so is this. By far this is my best eau de cologne.

Went a bit overboard but fuck it thought I'd try to help. Good luck man, if all else fails, get a hooker.

PriceZombie · 2014-02-14T23:52:29+00:00

Read the sidebar and don't skip this book it mentions.

StupidWes · 2014-02-15T18:54:02+00:00

We're not gonna help you get laid friend. That's not what this sub is about, we will help you to have an awesome time with life. Success with women is a side effect of that as much as anything. A 3 month get laid goal is setting yourself up for failure. We'd be happy to help, but not like this friend. You're putting gauze on the wound. We want to suture it up brother

naoufal2005 · 2021-12-29T01:05:31+00:00

Update

John-Luke · 2014-02-14T23:45:16+00:00

A few things:

Don't set a date of when you want to get laid, it will come. Instead focus on losing that weight and boosting confidence.

Talk as much as you possibly can to strangers, no need to be flirtatious, just converse normally and then progress. As a bartender this should be easy for you.

A thing me and my friends did to boost our confience. We would go out during the day and just go talk to whichever girls we could, doesn't matter who. If we got rejected then we all had a good laugh, if we were successful then all was good.

Work on your inner game and coming to terms with things you can't change. You claim you are ugly, I don't believe it as no one is naturally ugly, you'd be amazed at what a neat haircut and a change in style of clothing can do.

Also always ensure you have good personal hygene.

I can't guarantee you will get laid any time soon, however you will be more confident and look at life in a completely different way. Go get em brother

KidBill · 2014-02-14T23:50:19+00:00

What's the point even if you DO get laid? You might have a slight boost in sexual confidence, but it's not going to resolve any of the deeper issues you have with yourself. If you don't have social skills, you need to go out there and build them.

2014-02-15T04:16:43+00:00

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Headhongular · 2014-02-15T10:30:32+00:00

Get a job that constantly forces you to be social. Go to the gym. Browse MFA. Starting looking at people you see walking around and think of what you would say to them if you approached. It can't be simple, look for something that sets them apart from the person next to them. Eventually, if you do it enough, you can very easily pick an interesting and unique topic to bring up with anyone you meet. Observe, learn to not give a fuck, meditate, don't jerk it so much and realize that every negative thought about yourself puts you further from your goal.

ihatemymotorcycle · 2014-02-15T15:38:56+00:00

Dude, three months is nothing. Really nothing. You don't have to make this some sort of SMART target bullshit. One of my favourite TV shows ever was Long way down. Two guys ride motorcycles from the North of Scotland to Cape town, South Africa. Its just shy of 16,000 miles. They also did Long way round. From London to New York travelling East. That's a long way to go, and going that far is an achievement, especially over the terrain they encountered but what you very quickly learn is that it isn't about getting there, its about the journey. Enjoying it and soaking up the different cultures, landscapes, peoples, histories and just dicking about on motorbikes. They did a lot they hadn't even dreamed of before they set off, like getting 20 feet from Wild Elephants. You've got to be the same. You can't just have tunnel vision about it.

Having sex won't make you this cool guy who can do anything he wants, it just means you're a guy who had sex. To quote the meme "Hey everyone, this guy's had sex. See nobody cares." The funny thing is that if you go into every situation expecting sex to be the outcome, won't happen, just comes off as creepy. If you go into it not giving a fuck you're likely to achieve it. If you don't give a fuck then you won't be disappointed.

Regarding your height and weight. Nothing you can do about your height. The funny thing is, short guys, like 5'4 - 5'6 tend to own it, guys who are like 5'8 - 5'10 spend a lot of time wishing they were 6 foot. I'm just over 5 10 and I sometimes wish I was taller. A friend of mine is 6'7 and jokes that he only took up smoking because he heard it stunts your growth. He wishes he was about 6'2 or 6'3. So you always wish you were someone else. You've got to own who you are. It's quite normal to come out the other side of puberty with some extra body fat. Only one way to deal with that, eat less, move more. As long as you eat less calories than you burn you will burn fat. Head over to r/fitness and learn about things like basal metabolic rate and how building lean muscle mass will help you burn fat. Eat right, avoid carbs, cut fizzy drinks and fruit juices, sweets etc, eat lean meats, vegetables, etc I can't write enough about that here to help you out totally.

I'm also willing to bet that the guys at work are either older than you or just more experienced with women. That's cool you've got to desensitise yourself. Acclimatise. You ever go somewhere very hot or very cold? At first mentally you try to fight it then you start getting used to it then you start to enjoy it. So what. Don't compare yourself by them otherwise its just willy waving and that won't get your anywhere.

You're not in a terrible situation. You work in a bar, couldn't really be better. People are in a sociable mood, bit of alcohol means people forget their inhibitions. Just strike up conversations. Doesn't matter what. The reason you don't want to speak to women is because your scared of rejection. You're scared that they'll think you're this that or the other. Start talking to them but don't expect anything out of it other than a friendly chat. Just saying How are you, or how's your night going is a great start. Notice something interesting about her (a Tattoo, accent, funky hair cut, whatever) and ask about it. If you want go out in your car, or go out walking or whatever and just stop a woman and ask for directions, even if you know where you're going, ask what the time is because you think your watch is broken. Whatever. Start with that.

TheHeadHunterr · 2014-02-16T06:24:39+00:00

Dude, you're a BARTENDER, you should be getting more ass than a toilet seat.

Ask yourself this, do you want to have sex or do you want to be comfortable? Do you want to have sex or do you want to eat things that taste good to you?

If you want sex more, then eat healthy and exercise.

WonderBoy59 · 2014-02-16T07:14:25+00:00

Extend goal. Focus on dieting and working out. Thats what I would do anyways, dieting is hard enough if your stressing yourself with a 3month deadline and gaming girls.

genocide15 · 2014-02-18T10:33:45+00:00

You could always pay a girl at the end of the three months

toxicsnatch · 2014-02-19T21:06:30+00:00

Where do you live? If you live in or near SC, i know plenty of good time girls. Here, bartenders are a gold mine. Maybe a relocation is in order?

thehigheststatusmale · 2014-02-14T23:31:22+00:00

Go out every night.

Vozadam · 2014-06-16T14:39:23+00:00

What a fucking gimp, i bet you achieve nothing out of this attention seeking bitch rant.

I am short, fat, ugly, and 19. Help me lose my virginity within the next 3 months.

Comments

Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy

Title	I am short, fat, ugly, and 19. Help me lose my virginity within the next 3 months.
Author	waxjacket
Upvotes	1
Comments	44
Date	February 14, 2014 9:48 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1xxl8h/i_am_short_fat_ugly_and_19_help_me_lose_my/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-am-short-fat-ugly-and-19-help-me-lose-my.1366033 https://theredarchive.com/post/1366033