Can it take a while for a girl to warm up to you?

punktfan · 2024-06-16T04:50:54+00:00

Honestly sounds like you two need to be more direct in your communication with each other. If she wants to take 3 dates or more to open up, it's up to you if you're willing to go that slowly. Personally, I'm not, because I have so many other options where things flow more easily. But under no circumstances would I go on more than 3 dates with someone without some explicit communication about where things are headed and what both of you want out of it. Don't waste your time with uncertainty. It's either a fuck yes, or a fuck no. If you're not sure, it's a fuck no.

drewster23 · 2024-06-15T23:59:48+00:00

If you're not making it exclusive for no reason and open to other possibilities while still exploring this one because you think it's worth it and it's too early to tell.

Then nothing else matters

We aren't you and our anecdotal evidence has no bearing on your situation.

TRTGymBro1 · 2024-06-16T01:00:43+00:00

I’ve never had success with chasing a woman for more than a couple of dates. If I’m not banging her on the the third date, it’s not happening and I DONT WANT it to happen. Even three dates is a hit long tbh

InstructionAbject763 · 2024-06-16T02:54:49+00:00

The thing about opening up is men don't usually assess for compatibility

Usually men feel sold on the woman first 3 dates while she's logical and sitting there assessing your compatibility.

You may want her to open up and express herself

While that's not usually what should happen, because you're already invested and she's still just doing the BASIC assessing if yall could work out.

Because many men have assesses I should be open and more vulnerable sooner (3rd date ish) and it freaks me out and annoys me. The pressure to open up and get emotionally attached to people I don't yet trust is a super annoying modern dating trend

I have to know if I open up and get attached emotionally you won't abandon me in it And ghost me and or you'll take care of said emotional attachment or e d it if you don't like it.

Loads of men I've met want you to open up too soon, you do and you get emotionally attached and they decide to just ghost or leave

You have to show people they can open up to you, by showing reliability and consistency

If women aren't opening up, it's because date 3 is like soooo sooo early

I'd never reveal anything too soon

That's still the getting to know each other, maybe still talking to others stage

We should still be assessing basic compatibility not trying to flrm attachments

Setting a time line for vulnerability, sex, and other milestones is usually the best way to set a forest fire or fizzle things out or make people feel pressured to do things on YOUR time vs when THEY are ready

I had a guy tell me he likes me on the 3rd day but that I needed to be more vulnerable

And I'm like why??? We haven't even discussed where this is going? Why would I be vulnerable with a man I don't know will or may not be in my life in the future

I'm tired of men expecting us to get emotionally invested in them, when they are just maybe

3rd date you're still a maybe

As long as she's not like ice cold, you shouldn't expect more than just basic compatibility conversations still

cydestiny · 2024-06-16T03:34:39+00:00

Third date is an average. If you're experienced enough in dating or understand basic psychology, you should be able to gauge her interest in a date or two.

You don't have to warm up a girl, if she's interested in you, she'll find ways to "tell" you. If she's not, warming her up will just send you right into the friend zone.

You're overthinking, just go on dates with her, enjoy it, flow with the vibes and make your move naturally and subtly.

tldr; Date more girls.

AlexCosta · 2024-06-16T04:01:42+00:00

Just asking that question smells of desperation.

I don’t get it… why are there men out there who want to deal with women who aren’t interested in them?

There is no warming up that has to happen with women who are into you… so why chase after a woman who isn’t attracted to you? Why put yourself in that situation?

DrRayNay · 2024-06-16T01:40:39+00:00

It will take longer for a girl to warmup than a guy.

Bigboyfresh · 2024-06-16T09:41:28+00:00

I personally won’t deal with a slow burner. You could just be temporary until her real interest comes along or gives her the intention she’s looking for.

david-lee-roth- · 2024-06-16T22:19:07+00:00

From my experience too many dates that don’t go anywhere end In friend zone or, they have someone else they’re interested in or they’re not trusting and even when you do get them it’s a mess. It should be moving fwd. if it doesn’t just go somewhere else. Waste of time

cindyn11 · 2024-06-17T06:54:41+00:00

Hi, I'm a girl. And yes, it absolutely can take more than 3 dates for a girl to warm up to you... we get nervous... we need to feel that the vibes are right... we need to get to know you a little before we can tell if we're on the same page, or have similar values... just be cool and go with the flow. Putting the pressure on too early is a guaranteed way to make it a hard no, unless the stars have aligned. Take your time, be a good human.

No_Hat9118 · 2024-06-16T05:11:19+00:00

That’s not the reason u messed up, the reason is u didn’t physically escalate

Ok-Shock8867 · 2024-06-17T19:43:42+00:00

Yes.

I have had a lot of success with slow burn relationships but THROUGH FRIEND GROUPS. There are plenty of women in my life that have thought of me as nothing special at first, only to have some kind of pivotal "oh I'm into him" moment and we've dated for a bit.

If you're on dates, you need to be actively taking it somewhere. And nearly any 1:1 hangout between a sexually available man and a woman is a "date" even if the two parties aren't willing to admit it. If there isn't consistent romantic progress on each date, it's probably not happening. If you can't display your positive qualities in 1-6 dates, work on that.

Samuraibeb0p · 2024-06-16T10:29:25+00:00

Three days, really? Just be you bro! The more you want it the more she can tell. Be patient, straight with your expectations, and enjoy the ride. If it never happens, think of it as real life game exp points and level up.

psychedliac · 2024-06-16T07:03:38+00:00

It will usually take a while especially if she has kids, she wants to sus out that you’re not a creepy, and she probably doesn’t care that you just want sex, but she just wants to make extra sure you’re not a creep

Title	Can it take a while for a girl to warm up to you?
Author	Wean1eHu11
Upvotes	24
Comments	14
Date	June 15, 2024 11:40 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1dgup3s/can_it_take_a_while_for_a_girl_to_warm_up_to_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/can-it-take-a-while-for-a-girl-to-warm-up-to-you.1521701 https://theredarchive.com/post/1521701

Comments