Just venting to the ether.

Today is my last day in town. It's been 8 months since she filed. I have seen my kids twice in four months despite the court orders. I decided a month ago that I needed to leave. She destroyed my life and I want to start a new one.

I haven't packed a thing and I'll be on the road in less than 24 hours. I can't stay here, this is where we built a life (married 12 years, together for 16), but I don't want to leave. She has had two affairs that I know of, I'm not even sure my youngest son is mine, but I would go home in a heartbeat if she would let me. I still love her and I miss my family.

It took four months for me to get anything from my home, now I'm leaving most of it behind anyway.

So many men on here are much happier after their divorce, I am absolutely devastated. Two strokes (at 39). My lawyer says that leaving will not help my custody case, but I don't think there's a choice. At every turn, my wife has acted in bad faith and is using my sons as her weapon. There's no evidence that the court, guardian ad litem, or my wife will ever be reasonable, so I see no other chance at survival but to run away. There's no fight left.