It's official, ouch

captainchippsixx · 2024-10-16T19:12:46+00:00

My general advice Workout everyday it you can. Start small if you haven’t been doing it. Set goals and accomplish. In 2 months you will go holy shit. This will help your mental state at home either kids and at work. Pair with this making changes to eating healthier. Again start small if need be.

Start a big to do/goal list. Daily, weekly, monthly.
This includes finances, doctor, dental, correcting your beneficiary legal documents,
Then start accomplishing.

Join a hobby club, or a sports league. Even if once a week it is such a great thing to look forward to. Stay off the couch at nights without the kids. Stay in motion.

Treat yourself. Happy things like maybe you need a new phone, new shirts, cologne?
Heck maybe a different car. Brainstorm - no rush.

Your kids will be fine. You have to step up and be a kick ass dad. Show them especially when older that staying married unhappily is not something that anyone should do.

jrgunner · 2024-10-16T17:21:37+00:00

I remember that feeling of hopelessness and grief. I still feel grief. But when we split up I decided I wouldn't let this defeat me and I would become the best version of myself for my children. I want to be the father they deserve.

Started a whole health protocol (sleep, nutrition, exercise), reading, reconnecting with friends. I cannot begin to tell you how much that helped.

There were (still are) days where I felt I couldn't keep going. But I did...and over time you get better, stronger. Amd you come out the other side a better man and father.

Hang in there. If others have made, so will you.

I hope at least your STBX is decent enough to not.make it a long, drawn out process.

Wish you the best.

HarveyRichardMarcos · 2024-10-14T22:18:17+00:00

Can’t do anything. She is the one doing it. All you can do is make yourself physically stronger, so you can live longer for your kids. Money isn’t as important as your time on earth with them.

probebeta · 2024-10-14T20:37:56+00:00

Every rapid ends. Hang in there.

Then-Appointment9630 · 2024-10-13T21:57:18+00:00

Man I thought the world was going to end. Then when I realized what I went through and why it wasn’t the best situation for me. It took well over a year and a half for me personally. So give it time. I hated hearing that too, but it was the best advice for me.

Eric_C_Productions · 2024-10-13T21:28:51+00:00

Its not the end of the world. Think about when you were young and your parents got a divorce. How did you deal with the break up? Put yourself in those shoes again and how you handled your emotions, anger, and sadness. Now that your kids are going to be experiencing the same situation, think about how you would have done it differently and apply it to them. You live and you learn. Now it is time to apply this to your kids so that they don't have to go with what you went through.

How is your life over? You are simply starting a new path in your life. Hopefully for the good. You need to stop sulking and feeling sorry for yourself because you have other people that depend on you and your soon to be ex wife BOTH need to be responsible and do what is best for YOUR family. It hurts at first but you aren't the only one hurting.

I don't mean to be insensitive but take it from someone who was married for 20 years and together for 24 years. It was a rough marriage and I went through HELL both physically and emotionally. I came through and I look forward to a bright future FREE of my crazy ex wife.

GigaFastTwin · 2024-10-13T21:05:12+00:00

Keep swimming man - hang in there. Remember - you can always laugh again. It will get better. "If you're going through hell, keep going"

Komark10 · 2024-10-13T20:38:48+00:00

Stay positive as much as you can. You plan for a marriage but never a divorce and it’s hard when it hits you. Talk to a therapist. Do some workout or even a 5 minutes walk everyday would do you good.

Title	It's official, ouch
Author	bennyl23
Upvotes	20
Comments	16
Date	October 13, 2024 8:18 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1g2ysry/its_official_ouch/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/its-official-ouch.1532899 https://theredarchive.com/post/1532899

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