A top post in /r/theredpill right now is talking about the importance of self-respect. How does one develops self-respect without getting arrogant?

afroose · 2015-09-14T10:58:04+00:00

Just become arrogant.

CopperFox3c · 2015-09-14T16:23:49+00:00

Self-respect, from a TRP perspective, is about boundaries. It is not about imposing yourself, or your will, on others. It is not about forcing others to do what you want, nor about feeling entitled to things by virtue of simply who you are.

No. Self-respect, the TRP way, is about being willing to walk away at any moment, if someone crosses the boundaries you set. You lay out your expectations, you work hard to fulfill your part, and if someone else doesn't hold up their end of the bargain, you walk away. No begging, no pleading, no demanding.

yizolo · 2015-09-14T13:56:30+00:00

Arrogance is far preferrable to low self-respect. People can forgive a man's arrogance, but not someone who does not respect themselves. Better to overshoot it than fall short of the mark on this one.

NightwingTRP · 2015-09-14T12:25:44+00:00

In essence, avoid debasing yourself for women. Avoid doing things for them for free. Avoid doing things that you're not in control of - i.e. you chose to do it off your own back, rather than her asking/telling you to do it. Don't do anything which harms your own self-interest. Never sacrifice anything of yourself or your own for a piece of pussy ever again because you simply don't need to.

Learn to just say no to her and not care. Or better yet, have a good laugh at her for asking in the first place.

Arrogant isn't as bad as it sounds. I'm considered quite arrogant... yet in my social group, when I feel like leaving, all private conversations stop and everybody has to make a point to say bye to me and try to get a hi five or a handshake. That's an example of my own self-respect becoming a high level of respect from others. (They all need to pay their respects to the apex alpha in the group.) So don't be too concerned about being perceived as somewhat arrogant... so long as when you're accused of it you can have a good laugh at it and tell them they're overreacting.

Wolfwoodd · 2015-09-14T13:50:16+00:00

Benevolent alpha: good leader, doesn't feel the need to brag, knows his value and the value of his work (arrogance, i suppose, is over-valuing yourself and your work). His value is displayed subtly. He has a large social circle because people like being around him. He knows how to playfully flirt without being pushy or crude.

Does that kind of give you an idea of what you are going for? I agree that it's better to error on the side of arrogance. It's far better than under-valuing yourself.

EGOtyst · 2015-09-14T20:32:16+00:00

Everyone here is pretty much saying it right.

Arrogance is a label of the conceited given to those they envy. Notice how poor, ugly people are never labelled 'arrogant' of 'conceited.'

Arrogance and self-confidence are the same thing, it just depends on how much the person labelling you likes you.

In the event that you value/respect their input, then, potentially, you are coming off too strong. It does behoove one to foster relationships with others (mainly high-value people), as this will potentially help further your goals. There is little reason to actively be arrogant and project your self-confidence on others, as, at the end of the day, that is really just you begging for validation.

Once you raise your value (and recognize your value) it is only natural to consider yourself better than others. It is easy, also, to come to the conclusion that having certain people around is not helpful for you and that they bring no value into your life. This isn't arrogance, it is a legitimate evaluation of your value vs. those around you. If that results in you being better, then that just sucks for them. They are jealous and pissed that you are willing to point it out.

vengefully_yours · 2015-09-15T03:06:33+00:00

Confidence comes from knowing you can because you have, you're capable and experienced.

Arrogance is thinking you can but you have no experience nor capability, because you have not done anything.

Arrogance is annoying because they haven't done a damn thing, but assume they're fucking amazing. Confidence is intimidating because they know damn well they can do something, because they have often enough to become proficient.

Arrogance. Guy thinks his Neon Srt4 he just bought the is the fastest thing on the street, he gets cocky, talks shit, claims he won't race for less than $500. He either hasn't been to the track, or he doesn't realize that mid 14 second times are not fast.

Confidence. Another gearhead builds a car, puts in the time and effort, tests and tunes it, works out all the bugs, increases it's effectiveness, and makes it hook on the street. His car is a known entity, he has made hundreds of passes down a timed track. He has seen cars run several seconds faster than his mid 10 second car, and he knows what it takes to run tens all motor, no nitrous or forced induction, so he doesn't run his mouth. Still he knows what a faster car looks and sounds like, and that little Neon isn't going to cut it.

Anyone running tens knows it's starting to be quick, but that there's countless cars at strips all over the country that are faster, but that most cars running the streets are not going to have a chance. The guys with slow cars that have never even experienced running 13s or 12s will assume their pos is fast, when it isn't. A beat up completely stock 99 crapmaro will eat their lunch then fuck his girlfriend in the ass in that little Neon.

One has arrogance, the other confidence.

Apanthropos · 2015-09-14T11:35:09+00:00

Being arrogant is not something you should avoid. Remember that women love assholes.

Self-respect may lead to arrogance, because you put your needs first.

redpillcynic · 2015-09-14T14:40:44+00:00

Arrogance isn't a bad thing. You're still plugged into slave morality.

ItIsMyPrivilege · 2015-09-14T15:22:06+00:00

I'm not entirely sure. Right now I just try and fuel my own narcissism and exude arrogance. I'll try to find a "happy-medium" or middle ground one day. Or maybe I won't.

I've been told by numerous girls, after not seeing them for a few months "wow, I can't believe you got even more cocky" or "I didn't think it were possible for you to have an even bigger ego". Or any variation. Apparently it just keeps steadily increasing and I've seen almost nothing wrong with it.

Brian_Official · 2015-09-14T16:36:43+00:00

Read some ayn rand, Atlas Shrugged, The virtue of selfishness, etc...

throw_em_all · 2015-09-14T17:05:13+00:00

The only arrogance you should be afraid of is the unjustified one, that's just ego and that is for the weak of mind.

Title	A top post in /r/theredpill right now is talking about the importance of self-respect. How does one develops self-respect without getting arrogant?
Author	ShounenEgo
Upvotes	9
Comments	25
Date	September 14, 2015 10:41 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3kw7hk/a_top_post_in_rtheredpill_right_now_is_talking/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/a-top-post-in-rtheredpill-right-now-is-talking.153802 https://theredarchive.com/post/153802

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