I started reviewing my dates and it has changed everything

StrikingImportance39 · 2025-07-15T14:33:11+00:00

It’s called field report.

Old school PUA stuff.

Very effective to learn and progress.

hunterpua · 2025-07-15T18:58:29+00:00

The mindset behind this is what separates the guys who will be successful and the guys who are constantly gonna be confused.

Seduction is a skill. Plain and simple.

Anyone claiming it doesn't work when they aren't putting in consistent practice, getting feedback, reviewing dates and approaches, and becoming more knowledgeable in tangible methods is akin to claiming Boxing doesn't work because they tried to throw a jab and it didn't work, after only seeing it in a video one time.

Jironasaurus · 2025-07-15T16:39:46+00:00

I write down everything that happens on my dates. It helped me tremendously to learn what I did right, and what I did wrong.

Of course it's good to know what to look out for. That bit is part social intuition, part knowledge. So, have principles that you follow, and you know for sure it works!

Login2028 · 2025-07-15T21:07:30+00:00

This is basically what Casanova did he would write conversations word for word. I think that's why he was so good. Everyone one should read his autobiography, it's great

Tribestar95 · 2025-07-15T22:16:39+00:00

What are your biggest takeaways to have successful first and second dates?

miyass_miyass · 2025-07-16T05:25:29+00:00

You say it made a real difference. In what way / to what extent did your tangible results improve?

mrssheela · 2025-07-19T01:49:15+00:00

Field report

LimbBisquet · 2025-07-15T18:30:13+00:00

A little weird, but also completely misguided. I spent years trying to analyze every single body movement, word coming out of my mouth (or her mouth), whether I was more attractive if my hair was slicked one way or the other.

Beyond the very basics of socializing, this is a complete waste of your time. The more you analyze what you did wrong, the more you will find something wrong with you. Look deep enough and the abyss will look back at your kind of thing.

I recommend a very different approach that begins with creating a very clear list of what you want in a woman. What type do you like, what qualities do you want her to have, values, how you want to be treated. Also, write down your dislikes and dealbreakers. Do you dislike being left on read, ignored, flaked on, do you dislike women playing with their phones on a date, etc. Be very specific about all of this. Have rules. A man who doesn’t have rules will be forced to accept the woman’s rules and trust me, you are not going to like that.

Understand that the bigger prick you are, the more you are going to get laid. Nice guys who are cool with everything and anything, never get laid. Because women see them as pushovers and someone who won’t stand up to her. If a guy can’t stand up to her, how will he stand up to a male competitor who wants to rape her or take her away? Or a TRex who is trying to eat her and your baby? Do you get it?

Once you have your list of likes and dislikes and have started working on your rules, share that list because you will keep updating it the more experience you get. From now on, I want you to use this list as the basis for screening women.

Let say that your type is dark haired Asian goth girls, who are into kinky sex and are open to having a polyamorous relationship. Great!

Now think. Where will you find girls like this? At the gym? Doubtful. In a salsa dancing club? Doubtful. What about your local Satanist’s club monthly chickens sacrifice ritual? Definitely!!!

When you approach women, you have to keep those values and qualities that you want in mind. Approach women with the frame of “I want to see if you are worth my time and effort”. Start screening women for what you want early on. Of course, flirt and do everything else, but don’t try to prove what a great guy you are to them. Don’t try to impress. Think of it as “what is she doing to impress me?”.

Same as when you go out on a date. Do t think of a date as something that gets you closer to getting laid. Think of a date as an opportunity to get to know her and see if she is what you want. Focus on her and asking questions about her, rather than trying to be an entertaining monkey who has to play 4D chess just to get laid. Understand that when you come across as someone who knows what he wants, someone who has rules about how people in his life are allowed to treat him, who is discerning, etc., will be seen as much more desirable than the guy who is easygoing or very eager to please her. Why?

Because women only want what they can’t have. A guy who is so concerned with everything going perfectly and pleasing her and making all the right moves, is someone she can easily have. Heck, you are throwing yourself at her, therefore they are never interested after that one date. The guy who makes it clear that he knows what he wants and has standards and rules, is someone she can’t have easily. She might be worried that you are not interested or attracted to her. And this stands a much higher chance of making her want to chase after you.

Same goes for the expectation and goal of having sex on a first date. If that’s all you are thinking and focusing on, the woman will sense it. She knows you want her and you will compromise everything just to get the nookie. You are what she can have easily and therefore, she’s not interested and you get ghosted.

Instead focus on getting to know her and assume that if you like her, sex is just a matter of time and place. No rush. What is the rush if you are confident that you will eventually have sex? Only men who are unsure about where their next meal will come from are so anxious about getting sex fast.

If you want to review your dates, please do so. But not in the dorky way you are doing it. Instead, take the list of values and qualities that you wrote down, and score each date against that list.

For example:

She’s punctual: Mary Jane 50% (because she was 10 mins late, but she texted you ahead of time she’s running late.
Open to being casual/poly: Mary Jane 0% (because she says she’s looking for a monogamous relationship with her soul mate).

Etc. Since she’s not what you are looking for, she’s out. Of course, most dates will score higher and some lower on most qualities. What is acceptable to you, is up to you. I wouldn’t compromise too much, but I would also not be extremely rigid, because let’s face it, no woman will be your perfect ideal woman. But if let’s say the cumulative score is above 70%, hey, maybe you can explore something with her.

This type of scoring will also give you a more objective and clearheaded view of women, instead of letting your little head doing the thinking for you just because you haven’t gotten laid in a year.

pitterpatter-96 · 2025-07-15T21:49:04+00:00

Can we focus on connection versus data? Yall fucking killing me lmao. Read models by mark Manson plzzzz

Simoane_Said · 2025-07-17T04:16:21+00:00

OP says “I’m not trying to promote anything”, right after saying “Now I want to build a tool”

The purpose of this post was to gather people who are looking for a product to solve their “problem”

How dumb can people be to overlook this subtle ad is beyond me. But then again it’s basically a subreddit for people that overlook obvious cues anyways 😆

Rafael_Armadillo · 2025-07-15T14:33:16+00:00

Surveilling people on a date is a really fucked up thing to do. Don't do it again

Title	I started reviewing my dates and it has changed everything
Author	Objective_Shallot879
Upvotes	78
Comments	37
Date	July 15, 2025 2:22 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1m0j3lk/i_started_reviewing_my_dates_and_it_has_changed/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-started-reviewing-my-dates-and-it-has-changed.1557228 https://theredarchive.com/post/1557228

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