Starting to lose hope.

Feeling-Target2570 · 2025-10-01T19:18:12+00:00

Man, I feel this. Sometimes you can have everything ‘on paper’ but if the vibe isn’t clicking, it just feels like pushing water uphill. Respect for owning it without blaming external stuff though , that’s rare and says a lot about your mindset.

norwegiandoggo · 2025-10-01T20:01:54+00:00

Droughts are normal. Sometimes some rejection messes with our mojo. I remember this dude who used to sleep with uglies just to get into his groove again. Anything to make the drought stop

miyass_miyass · 2025-10-02T06:40:39+00:00

In my experience trying to run multiple funnels at once is super confusing and difficult. I know the typical advice here is to “do mostly nightgame and social circle and then do some opportunistic daygame during your daily life and also swipe OLD while on the toilet” but in my experience this doesn’t work at all and I only started improving by doing structured high-volume daygame and avoiding everything else.

Pick one way of meeting women and focus on that until you have “proof of concept”.

Kierenbrowncoach · 2025-10-02T09:52:03+00:00

Brother, let me cut straight through the noise, you’re not invisible because of your looks, height, or tattoos. Those are assets, not flaws. You’re striking out because women don’t feel your presence. Seduction isn’t a résumé. It’s energy. You can be six-foot-two and model-tier, but if you walk into a bar radiating frustration, self-pity, or “I need this to work,” women sense it instantly. They don’t see the handsome guy in front of them, they feel the vibe underneath, and right now yours is tired and desperate instead of playful and magnetic.

The truth is that attraction is 80 percent energy, 20 percent everything else. Looks get you noticed, but your vibe determines whether she leans in or checks out. Women don’t want to meet a man who feels like he’s grinding through another approach; they want to meet a man who’s already enjoying himself and letting her into his world. If you’re walking up like you’re pitching a startup, she’s gone. If you’re walking up like you’ve already won the night, she’s curious.

Stop thinking “game.” Think experience. When you approach, your job isn’t to win her, it’s to play, tease, and spark tension. One woman might bite, another might blow you off, but neither outcome should move your frame. The moment you detach from results and lean fully into the interaction itself, women will start chasing that energy. Paradoxically, that’s when the lays, flings, and connections start piling in.

So don’t spiral into the “I’m cursed” narrative. You’ve already got the external qualities most men would kill for. Now you need to stop playing not to lose and start playing to enjoy. Women don’t crave perfect men, they crave men who make them feel. If your nights out aren’t fun for you, why would they be fun for her?

Ok-Orange7146 · 2025-10-01T20:08:49+00:00

Because you are looking to others for validation and don’t actually love yourself.

Thus, since you are striking out left and right and using the response of others to judge yourself, you feel invisible and believe you are actually invisible.

If you are starting to lose hope, that means your foundation of love for yourself was never there. It was built by others. Hence, You don’t actually love yourself.

Hell, you should be thinking “im good, i’m gonna find a girl sooner or later who values me in a positive light like i see myself. I’ve had pretty girls before. Random opinions can’t change how i feel about myself”

The reality you believe is the one you live.

Alarmed_Box1198 · 2025-10-01T19:50:01+00:00

Not to make excuses because that obviously doesn't help but I definitely think social media has significantly raised the bar for most guys. Practically every woman on the face of the earth now believes they have endless options. With practically zero effort, there's hundreds of apps where simps will flood their inbox and make even 4s feel like 10s.

hansieboy10 · 2025-10-02T09:03:05+00:00

How is your health? Diet/sleep/exercise?

ArjunVermaReddit · 2025-10-03T08:03:24+00:00

Which country, just curious. Because that matters a lot.
This is my reality as well at the moment. But I want your stats. How many approaches per day? Which places are you meeting? Are you working full time? If yes when are you gaming? Do you have wingmen?

NaturalSelectionNine · 2025-10-02T08:11:47+00:00

This phase is inevitable, and everyone has to go through it one way or another in their cold-approaching-girls journey.

Some go through it in the beginning, some in the middle, some later, and some often here and there.

Often you'd still lose even if on paper you did and said the right stuff, so you need to understand and accept that the only thing in your control is your action and not the result.

And if as of now the only option you have when it comes to taking action is for you to keep going, then you keep GOING. Because what else is the fucking alternative brother? Quitting? Hell no.

AdventurousTip2880 · 2025-10-03T07:44:30+00:00

I'm attractive, 6ft and "tattooed" 😄 🤣

BurnItDownSR · 2025-10-01T19:58:39+00:00

All the downvotes to this post are coming from the blackpillers and "looksmaxxing" children.

Title	Starting to lose hope.
Author	Hungry-Forever4108
Upvotes	11
Comments	21
Date	October 1, 2025 7:02 PM UTC (10 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1nvh8i4/starting_to_lose_hope/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/starting-to-lose-hope.1563238 https://theredarchive.com/post/1563238

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