Do you always pay for dinner on dates

Cartman · 2026-07-08T23:48:25+00:00

Drinks or coffee dates for a first meeting, never dinner!

DanielisCold · 2026-07-08T23:22:00+00:00

I never do dinner dates for the first 3 dates I always do something I find fun and they’d probably find fun too like going to dave & busters, sip & paint in the park (open the bottle in front of her) gym and brunch hangouts (this a hit or miss) been a hit for me on the most part, mini golf, etc. these are pretty cheap and it’s way easier to break the touch barrier and have fun banter dinner dates are definitely for the girls I feel comfortable with and want to have a nice elegant night out with not complete strangers. But i’m young tho so if your 30 probably don’t take a girl to dave & busters 😂

Specific_Delay_460 · 2026-07-08T23:30:26+00:00

Yes, and I do so like it isn’t even in question. Obviously if a woman insisted on paying I’d let her but they never do. This might vary slightly based on age and location but I can’t imagine how not paying would ever work in your favor.

Broad-Cranberry-9050 · 2026-07-08T23:54:42+00:00

Personally first date or two i just take them somewhere casual. Especially first date. You can easily find fancy places that even if price for a single thing is high, nobody is going to order a high number of. For example, rooftop bars. A cocktail is probably going to be 3-6 dollars more expensive than a regular place. But in a first date no girl is going to buy 5-6 cocktails. So usually i tend to spend around 50 bucks in a date like that and that includes appetizer.

Now for 4 dates that's still 200 bucks. Then make it even more casual, the ones you arent sure of or met online, take them to a casual but fun bar.

For me the way i see it is, if i want to prove to her im a worthy guy to have sex with and date, she needs to prove to me she's a worthy girl so i can lavish with nice dinners. Sometimes ive taken girls on a nice 2nd date to a nice dinner, other times it's not until date 4-5. It depends.

Just keep taking them to cheap places and always offer to pay. Go in thinking that you will likely pay for the date and take them places that you can afford.

Creative-Big-128 · 2026-07-09T02:43:10+00:00

I do, i just like eating and getting little drunk with some beautiful girl. Its kinda for my pleasure. But if you don’t like this activity, just go to coffee shop and get some coffee and desert. And be a Man and pay for that Desert

Nervous-Arrogance · 2026-07-09T07:54:44+00:00

I never do dinner dates initially, at least not until I have slept with them. This is not a cost thing. I am not a foodie, and going out for meals is not really something I do anyway. If I am seeing someone however... I will make sacrifices and compromise. But for first date, nope, I want something I enjoy.

As far as dates go, I only do things and go places I would go to regardless. As far as paying goes, yeah I will pay for the first date. Lets be honest, if I was going somewhere with a mate and they couldn't afford it, I would pay. I am not putting on some fake show to impress a woman here, I am just doing as I usually would.

However....

A lot of women I meet will then INSISIT they pay for the second date, and hell they will even organize it. Those ones I keep seeing.

If a woman expects me to plan and pay for EVERY date and never has any intention of paying for herself... she is forgotten about.

When it comes to bars and drinks, (firstly I am UK, so we don't have a bar tab system, we pay for drinks as we get them), I will pay for the first drink, again, if the woman insists on getting in the second round, then it continues. If she expects me to pay for every drink, then its a short date.

As I am only going places I would normally go and doing things I would normally do, this does not break the bank. Only putting in this caveat, as I know IRL guys, who when they get a date they go somewhere really expensive to "impress" a woman with their money. In fact one of them is now only a year away from paying off his debts for the fake lifestyle he created in a relationship, which ended because he could no longer get any loans or credit cards. Don't be that guy.

liferelationshi · 2026-07-09T01:15:54+00:00

Never do dinner dates for at LEAST the first three dates and longer if possible. Keep the cost to $0 or as little as possible for as long as possible. You’re filtering for a woman who likes you for you and not your money or what she can extract for free. If she is a genuine woman and actually likes you, she will be completely fine with this!

Orange_Codex · 2026-07-08T23:53:22+00:00

Dinner?

Justwatchinitallgoby · 2026-07-09T05:13:42+00:00

Who goes on dinner dates?

Drinks at a neighborhood spot preferably walking distance from your place.

ImpossibleWaiting · 2026-07-09T07:02:52+00:00

Don't do dinner dates, do action dates.

okyagotpuns · 2026-07-10T00:57:30+00:00

My rule thumb is the first three are on me. Is she wants a 4th then take me out baby. I also set up my dates in tiers. Drinks at a bar then an arcade then drinks/dinner 3rd location. They are all walkable from each other. If round 1 is fun to round 2. Dont be afarid to end a date at any time. Ps dont tell them you have 3 spots set already. This has dont me wonders

DiabolicDiabetik · 2026-07-09T00:38:57+00:00

Personally for first dates I try to do drinks or coffee (lower commitment) but we sometimes end up getting food too. I always try to pay for the first date, I think it's nice and for better or worse many women expect it.

Green flag if she offers to pay half (usually I'll tell her she can pay next time) or is thankful. Red flag if she doesn't say anything and seems to just assume you'll pay.

After the first date we usually do more casual hangs at my place (free!). Or we alternate paying when we go out or split things. Personally not trying to be someone's sugar daddy but some people like that dynamic

Also damn brother 4 dates in one weekend? Yeah that's gonna be expensive 😂 I am overwhelmed if I'm seeing more than 2 people in a week

joggingjunkie · 2026-07-09T00:52:03+00:00

Lol oh you from nyc😂

Your pockets gonna get tapped...

If they are outside your borough, your best bet is try to plan early dates(in their borough)so you can get back on the train and get back to your area at a decent time..

If there is a park or something within reach, that would be of a great help...

You are going to have to cut corners or cut women

trmbn65 · 2026-07-09T00:55:34+00:00

Yes but have since done park or a drink to save money.

anonychef117 · 2026-07-09T03:11:24+00:00

Dinner dates never goes well. Always go for coffee or walk in park or drinks ( drinks works the best)

amusingvillain · 2026-07-09T18:15:43+00:00

No dinner until after you hit the sack

shinbreaker · 2026-07-09T01:29:24+00:00

So I do a mix of dinner and drinks depending on the date. It's always a little tricky with food since you really need a good spot that it's hard for her ot not get something she likes. But I feel you as I had a weekend of dates and dropped around $400+ when all was said and done.

Here's what I've come to realize. First off, keep first dates a bit more casual yet not low class. I went on a date yesterday with a woman to a midtown bar that had a happy hour. We had oysters, tacos, and five maragraitas for $50. This s ideal for those after work dates.

If you're doing a weekend, go for brunch instead of dinner. Brunch is usually cheaper, but women love brunch. Do a search for some nice spots and let her get what she wants and you can keep it a little cheap for yourself. Make sure to get something or else she'll feel weird. I'm on GLP1s so I cant eat much anyways.

Another move is to look for places that serve a lot of food. I'm talking about way too much food that neither of you will ever finish and share a plate.

Flex_Field · 2026-07-09T09:35:09+00:00

Never been on a date.

But I'm from a generation and a culture in which picking up the bill is a privilege and a flex.

I would imagine that I would be paying for dinner if I ever received a "yes".

ethe_ze · 2026-07-08T23:47:33+00:00

you have to lol. women are expensive is what my cuzzo would say

smind893 · 2026-07-09T02:01:01+00:00

I do

Cause im a grown up

I invited someone out when they could stay home so I can't then ask them to pay

Grow up

Title	Do you always pay for dinner on dates
Author	VaporWaveShine
Upvotes	22
Comments	34
Date	July 8, 2026 11:13 PM UTC (3 weeks ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ur8y1h/do_you_always_pay_for_dinner_on_dates/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/do-you-always-pay-for-dinner-on-dates.1584571 https://theredarchive.com/post/1584571

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