I've had that glass shattering moment with my best friend. I always suspected she was one of those women, but she was pretty decent at hiding it from me. Our friendship imploded this weekend and her behavior has been despicable ever since. Read on...

First, the guy I have started somewhat seriously seeing recently had his parents visit for the football game this past weekend. They even brought the family dog! So we meet them for dinner Saturday night at one of the nicer restaurants in town, where I happen to work. It's in my comfort zone, I know the menu inside out... I was even able to entirely orchestrate the reservations--who waited on us, the wine selection, even the wine glasses themselves. Nothing was left to chance.

Early on in the meal, my friend, Emily, marches over to the table (she was not our server), places her hand on my guy's dad's shoulder, and forcibly introduces herself. She's laying it on thick. Everyone at the table--his parents, their family friends, my guy, me--was visibly uncomfortable, so I interrupted Emily's histrionics to request that she fetch me another cocktail. When she returned, she picked up her story where she had previously left off.

My future FIL (joking) tried to make polite conversation. He's a well respected gynecologist and professor at my state's big medical school. Emily couldn't help but disclose her infant nursing career. Still. Touching. FIL.

Eventually she's called away from our table, thank god. As we're filing our way to the door, Emily motions for me to come over and speak with her. "Oh, I really love his parents! Especially his dad," she tells me. "He's handsome for an older man. So, you think he could get me an in at the medical school?"

At this point, despite my haziness from the dinner cocktails, the scales had fallen from my eyes. This girl... this girl who I had considered a friend... she's a ho! As this realization came crashing into my little hazy mind, I drew her in for a hug. His family was still around. My boss was within ear shot. "Fuck off, Emily," I said quietly, mid-hug.