Help a noob resolve an apparent Red Pill contradiction

rpteacher · 2016-07-06T22:06:20+00:00

An increase in money does not mean higher SMV. Doing well in your profession is about you. It is not so much about the money, it is about being a high value male both at home and at work. Also, screw your wife, figure out what you want(which sounds like you already know) and stick with it. This post sounds like you are still strongly in her frame. Figure out what YOU want. Keep working.

[deleted] · 2016-07-06T22:13:20+00:00

Women like a man on a mission. professional success is a mission. So long as you're not doing it to get her validation, it's a good thing.

That bit is for the guys who say they earn good money, as if it matters when their wife is treating them shitty

[deleted] · 2016-07-07T02:09:07+00:00

Money on a man is like makeup on a woman.

Its gotta be done right to be effective

SDSAM21 · 2016-07-07T02:37:11+00:00

[permanently deleted]

rocknrollchuck · 2016-07-06T22:16:11+00:00

Your financial situation can be eased greatly if SHE goes out and gets a job to supplement your income for a while until your business starts bringing in a decent income. You're right, why should you go back to being a corporate desk jockey? You shouldn't! SHE should get out there and work for a while if the leaner budget is a problem for her.

jeeohnjones · 2016-07-06T22:22:54+00:00

Providing is a good beta trait.

Just being an ATM with no alpha traits is why 'beta' gets sneered at.

Alpha-Bux is the most desirable to women.

Griever114 · 2016-07-07T14:50:22+00:00

The core principle is simple: remove your wife/so/etc from the equation. DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY.

One of the core tenants of MAP is to fit things in your life to the end result of happiness.

For example: If you are struggling with money even though you budget well, you need to access if you need a higher paying job, be more frugal or learn to adapt to the lifestyle. Its all about removing rode blocks and improving the SELF.

In your case, GET THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR WIFE'S FRAME.

What do I want to do? I want to keep trying to make it work being my own boss. That's going to require some sacrifices (e.g., wife needs to adjust to living on a leaner budget for a while longer) that my wife won't like. But to be completely honest, I look at it this way: she's not working, I'm enjoying being my own boss and not being a corporate desk jockey, so why the fuck should I go back to doing what I don't want to do work-wise so that I can be an unappreciated Beta provisioner? Sure, maybe boosting my income would boost my SMV, but it's honestly not worth it to me to return to the corporate office grind all in the hopes that my wife might actually start having sex with me once or twice a week.

Notice the bold VS italic. Can you see which is YOUR FRAME and HER FRAME.

Remember, this is YOUR SHIP. She isnt the breadwinner, her opinion is MOOT. She is the 1st mate. If she wants to jump ship, point her to then stern and say, "happy swimming." Granted, this can only be done if you have all your shit together. Since you are an attorney and looking to make it on your own, you seem somewhat confident in your plan. GO FOR IT. Why does her opinion matter? Are you looking for mommy to pat you on the head? BE A MAN. HAVE VISION. HAVE ALL THE THINGS!

MAP is there to improve the self. Who DOESNT want more money, less stress, a sexier body, etc. You are providing for your family. If you said you were starting your own business so you could stay at home and shoot cans in the back more often i would agree with your wife that you are a fuck up. However, if you are doing thing to maximize profitibility/less stress... FUCK HER. She wants the benfits of a letting you get bleed dry in Corporate while she sits on her fucking ass at home.

YOU DONT REPORT TO YOUR WIFE. Earn as much or as little as you want. But remember, you are the head of the household and that means providing for the family. Its YOUR responsibility. Provide doesnt necessarily mean LUXURY. Unless you want to make shitloads of money to not have to do jack shit... but thats on you

redearththeory · 2016-07-07T01:48:26+00:00

This is a well known dynamic: women are risk adverse and comfort seeking and therefore will not support their men investing the time and taking the risks necessary to build real wealth. Women would prefer a reliable donkey provider who stays at their miserable safe job.

innominating · 2016-07-07T04:04:28+00:00

You want to work for yourself. If you are passionate about that, and not just saying it because you are a lazy fucker, then working for yourself is the best way to raise your SMV in the long run.

Have a vision, she either buys in or she doesn't.

WhiteTrashKiller · 2016-07-07T12:57:13+00:00

Being succesful in life increases your SMV not in a Beta provisioning way, but it gives you the financial ability to access parts of society unattainable by the minimum wage group and as such opens up doors with women of said group.

Beter hobbies, better toys, better wardrobe, better food(keeping you fit and lean). Ever wonder why poor people in the US are fat and poor people in Africa are skinny? Processed food is cheap cause it isn't real food. It will fill your belly, but will kill you, make you fat and esentially undesireable to a portion of society.....

Now that being said just because your financially successful doesn't mean you aren't a chump.

Let me ask you, why isn't she looking for work? Has she ever worked? Could she work? Does she have any marketable skill(Other than sucking your Dick) that enables her to contribute? Lets face it she must have done something right to secure your provisions in the first place.

Use feminism against them, they want to be empowered and career oriented great, that also means they can pay for 50% of the tab.......

IASGame · 2016-07-07T14:03:57+00:00

If you want to trade money for negotiated, desireless sex, you should be looking for prostitutes instead.

I you expect that in a good marriage, your wife will desire to have sex with you, you have to be valuable. Your personal potential counts for your value, but is not directly related with your current salary.

I believe this article from Rational Male will be helpful to clarify a bit the difference:

https://therationalmale.com/2012/06/11/case-study-creative-intelligence/

Note the difference between the desirability for short and long term relationships in the results. Technically, even though you are married, I believe you are better off with more short term desirability and therefore your own business may be a better option to increase your wife's desire.

JackGetsIt · 2016-07-07T15:15:37+00:00

On the other hand, Red Pill advice says that provisioning (i.e., financially supporting a woman) is a Beta trait

No. This is your first misunderstanding. A man that marries a faithful women and supports her and his children is not a beta.

Redpill simply warns men that women have this duality while they are hunting for men. If you project to a women you first meet that you have a nice car, clothes, career she will want to put you into a, beta provider role instead of an alpha role. A women's greatest fantasy is an alpha with strength money and resources who commits to her and her alone. So, we warn newbs to the redpill not to project a provider role when initiating courtship so that the potential female only see's alpha traits and creates a chemical bond in her mind; women don't create a strong chemical bond to men that only offer financial security. Having money and provisioning isn't beta it's when and how you provide it that can make a man a full beta.

On one hand, Red Pill advice tells me that boosting my income by going back to a corporate job would boost my SMV and therefore get me laid more often with my wife.

No. This only boosts sexual market value to single women that don't have a man. Boosting SMV to you're wife is all about being a charismatic man with a rock solid plan that you are devouted too. A man of action.

If your current business idea is not bringing as much money home you will never be able to talk you wife into this being the right move; women and especially wives are highly risk averse.

It will only be the right move in her eyes when the money is sitting in the bank and then she will act like she supported you all along. Therefore the only way to keep your wife supporting you and to increase SMV is to double down on your charisma and commitment to a plan. This will be difficult to act confident when you damn well know that most new business' fail. You need to hide your worries about your new business from your wife. She will amplify those in her mind; she will be watching you everyday for signs of weakness or depression. Feel free to talk about doubts and planning issues with male friends, consultants or a therapists but never to your wife.

Also SMV isn't really an applicable acronym for this. You just want to increase your wife's sexual desire towards you and you alone. So I'd just call it Wife emotional, sexual support. WESS. So let's use that. If you increase your general SMV your wife might see it as you looking to fuck other women; in her mind you are dreading her; that will turn her into an anxiety ridden squirrel.

wife needs to adjust to living on a leaner budget for a while longer

Women hate stepping backwards lifestyle wise. If you ever pull a move like starting you own business again try to keep her lifestyle as stable as possible.

But to be completely honest, I look at it this way: she's not working, I'm enjoying being my own boss and not being a corporate desk jockey, so why the fuck should I go back to doing what I don't want to do work-wise so that I can be an unappreciated Beta provisioner?

This is logic. This makes sense to you, me and the men on redpill but it won't make sense to your wife. Women operate on feelz, not realz. So if she see's you happier, and you take her out more and have fun with her it will go a long way in convincing her that this was the right move. Don't try to talk her into it or logic her into it. Don't tell her how she should feel about it.

so why the fuck should I go back to doing what I don't want to do work-wise so that I can be an unappreciated Beta provisioner?

You can't. Don't go back on what you committed too. Going back to the corporate job will cement in her eyes that you are 100% beta provisioner husband and this will kill your marriage over the long run because you entered her frame. The few successful marriages remaining in north america are marriages that have a strong male leader that is an alpha provider not a beta provisioner.

You might have to drag her kicking and screaming through all of this and she will act like a child but that's what leaders have to do sometimes. Leaders take calculated risks and show amused mastery as they pilot the ship.

honestly not worth it to me to return to the corporate office grind all in the hopes that my wife might actually start having sex with me once or twice a week.

This is the right instinct. Stick with it. If she decides to be childish and attempts to use a dead bedroom as a tool to punish you. So be it. Don't let it show that it bothers you. She will start fucking you again when she see's how happy you are and see's you are working a plan. She will definitely start fucking you again when your business takes off.

Chump_No_More · 2016-07-07T15:56:37+00:00

I agree with other posters. Having a vision, being passionate about what you do, and getting shit done weighs more heavily than any specific dollar value. That said, any social proof from what you do is a huge bonus.

For example, I absolutely love what I do. I wake up excited every morning for the challenges the day will bring. My wife totally feeds on that and expresses often how that adds to her attraction to me.

Additionally, I'm a bit of an 'exotic animal' (my wife's words) in my field of work. When we're out together and people ask what I do, the response is often very animated and my wife is right there, beaming proudly, holding me tight.

Do not underestimate the importance of loving what you do and any social proof that comes from it.

IMO, anything more than living very comfortably is just ego. There's a difference between abundance and opulence, but YMMV.

nopeToThe43rd · 2016-07-07T18:32:09+00:00

What do I want to do?

What do you want to do?

Title	Help a noob resolve an apparent Red Pill contradiction
Author	Alpha_Rising
Upvotes	7
Comments	23
Date	06 July 2016 09:58 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	askMRP
Link	https://theredarchive.com/post/207341
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/4rl0i6/help_a_noob_resolve_an_apparent_red_pill/