Men are not the gatekeepers of relationships

Bigsmell1983 · 2019-02-16T06:55:47+00:00

Too many guys see relationships as the only solution to their problem of not getting sex, so they pass over the hand that they should have. So in that sense you're absolutely right.

If a guy has abundance, then he will be able to get sex without getting into a relationship. In this case, he becomes the gatekeeper to relationships.

This got very clear to me when I got single again in my thirties. They're all looking for a boyfriend, guys are looking for sex until they meet a girl they think are worth the hassle of a relationship.

If a guy is confident and has abundance, he will be more of a gatekeeper to relationships.

TheBookOfSeil · 2019-02-16T07:20:45+00:00

Both are the gatekeepers of both if the opposite sex is the one chasing.

Those who want it are giving the other person the position to “give them the keys.”

dontdoitpleaseno · 2019-02-16T08:58:55+00:00

Whenever I've had any kind of relationship with women, I'm the one that pushes for sex and they're the ones that pushes for commitment. This is a pretty common scenario. Same with my male friends - they are almost never the ones to push for commitment.

I think it is mainly extremely low value guys who push for commitment because it actually benefits them. Any other guy is much happier without

a-WaltzingMatilda · 2019-02-16T12:45:02+00:00

It’s not “gatekeepers of relationships” it’s “gatekeepers of commitment”.

That may seem superficially identical, but it really isn’t.

It’s possible to have an uncommitted relationship.

But when it comes to wanting marriage, kids etc, men are in control of that step.

DXBrigade · 2019-02-16T13:30:13+00:00

Most women can't have a new relationship easy peasy.

Ultramegasaurus · 2019-02-16T09:35:08+00:00

Elite men are gatekeepers of relationships, however, the average man doesn't gatekeep shit.

despisedlove2 · 2019-02-16T11:04:29+00:00

Interesting that you pick rape.

Divorce rape with the state as MC is the modern reality.

Maybe there is more to what you are trying to disagree with?

[deleted] · 2019-02-16T13:14:40+00:00

Snap back to reality oh there goes gravity: women are the gatekeepers of both

Perhaps to betas. Only because men don't realise their potential. Desired men are always the gatekeepers of commitment. Why do you think there's so many single mothers in their 30s on dating apps crying about how men won't commit to them. Because most men will have sex with them but they have nothing to offer in regards to commitment.

Tell me what these women offer in a committed relationship? The men who don't realise their potential would perhaps agree with you that women are the gatekeepers of both because it's societies narrative of pedestalising women.

But men are in no way gatekeepers of relationships. Women can find a new guy for a relationship easy peasy, 100s of options just waiting. But there's two other reasons I will give.

Sure she can. But quality is her issue. Those men are mostly simps. She doesn't genuinely desire them. She's essentially settling for them. The men she wants are highly sought and out of her league mostly because let's face the average woman can't compete with top-tier attractive women. Even more so when she hits her 30s. Hell if she's a single mother, she has no chance with men like me. So I'll leave that up to some poor thirsty sap.

Here's your assumption though. Why is she even worth it? What does she offer that I couldn't get off of any other woman? Considering your average women are just copies of each other who just want to drink and go out partying and then only settle when they hit their mid thirties or when they've had children. Why would I want these women? Give me a woman who actually offers something unique. Who is an absolute worldie. An exotic top tier beauty. Or perhaps she has talent and I may consider the fact she may be gatekeeper of both. But I guarantee you a woman who had developed herself wouldn't think like in terms like that.

The men want sex women want relationships trope is comforting but delusional. Because you see these same women head out on Friday night, bring him home, fuck this guy and never want to see him ever again. Zero attachment, it's not like women get attached to guys they have sex with by default. They're not looking for a relationship, just getting their rocks off.

Again these women are trash. They don't have any real feminine qualities that would make them worthwhile of commitment. Why would I want to go with a woman who offers absolutely very little when her best kept time going out getting drunk all the time. The wall awaits for her.

To well-desired men all the average woman offers is sex. And even that is fleeting because we can't stand being around them longer than a night at most. I would much rather be around women who have incredible talent. Right now, I'm hanging out with this incredibly attractive irish lass who has an incredible voice. She's well known for it. And a talented artist who does more interesting shit than go on a Friday night. Sure she may drink now and then but she's a fucking developed person and drinking culture isn't at the forefront. See, I can go to a bar and most of these women don't have anything else going on.

If anything I see men desperate for relationships rather than women. They're the ones begging on their knees for their "princess" to just notice him. I don't see women begging on their knees for a relationship, they have tonnes of options.

Of course they are. And so are women in their thirties or when they are single mothers. Although you may not see these women beg on their knees because they live passively mostly. They expect men to fall at their knees because all the thirsty simps confirm that to be her reality. But it's downright laughable if you think women don't come up to us and bother us. They will eye fuck you in public. They will attempt to get your attention. To notice them. They will even smile and chat nonsense to you.

The issue here is average and below average women expect a well desired attractive man. And the highly sought man are with top-tier women. So why would he even bother to commit to her? So the average woman has to settle. She rarely does though.

They have tonnes of options but if all those options are shit and the men who are they sought are out of their league then they either end up settling for a thirsty beta or end up alone in their late thirties. And you wonder why they are all so miserable?

The one's I feel more sorry for are the average or below average men. Because they are still much more developed in comparison to your average woman. And they have so much potential. Hell I went MGTOW because the average woman offers so little. The cure for me was top tier attractive women who are genuinely nicer to be around. And to the average men I would say either put the work in to raise yourself to the level of top-tier women or just travel to places where drinking culture isn't at the forefront. You'll be more inclined to find a woman of quality.

FarLeftAntiLiberal · 2019-02-16T06:51:08+00:00

No shit. It's another cope by the losers that populate every "manopshere" space other than incels.

These are the same people who think their "dread game" is working to control their wife meanwhile she doesn't give a shit and manipulates him to be her ATM

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Cho_Assmilk · 2019-02-16T13:18:45+00:00

People in general want relationships.

I have seen so many women who start tapping into this "abundance of relationships" you speak of only to push the good guys away by either giving a relationship with them little effort and nexting them or them seeing her hypergampus red flags and opting out. These same women see how easy they can find a new flavor and lose their ability to sacrifice for the better of a relationship. Women like this are jaded AF and a dude who wants a real relationship won't give her a chance.

So in effect, when a women spends too much time being the gatekeeper of both sex and relationships, she forfeits the privilege of being a gatekeeper for a good relationship.

goatismycopilot · 2019-02-16T13:45:50+00:00

I think when the PPD men here say that women can easily find relationships what they are imagining is different, they imagine having a regular woman around to sit for hours watching them game and giving them snacks and then during a moment when the man gets bored, they bang wash rinse repeat every Saturday night.

SerpentCypher · 2019-02-16T12:54:36+00:00

No, women are not gatekeepers of both. Attractive people are gatekeepers of both. Look how powerless women are in the presence of hot, high value men. In those scenarios the man is the gatekeeper of both sex and relationships. Women not being in control around these guys is a large reason why pumping and dumping is a thing. Women get scarcity mentality around these guys.

Your average guy is not the one in control with most women though, because scarcity mentality and being the one to approach works against them. They have to prove their worth before women allow them to make things sexual/a relationship.

Uncommon_Sensed_1234 · 2019-02-16T06:56:22+00:00

From an old Christian view that is not taught anymore, the ultimate commitment is marriage and marriage for the man because woman was created for his benefit and is subordinate to him in matrimony. She is instructed to obey him so this makes him the one who controls the marriage.

In western culture it is the woman who must sway the man to propose marriage. It is on him to offer her this type of commitment. It is recent that woman propose.

CatchPhraze · 2019-02-16T07:06:06+00:00

Why do you write like that man waiting for his princess who does not notice him and thus is out of his leauge as a tragic figure, then tell the woman waiting on Chad to get fucked?

He can get fucked if he's trying to play outside his league. Your bias is crazy. The truth is that nobody is the gate keeper at all, every interaction with every pair has a different dynamic. Nobody got tossed any keys.

Title	Men are not the gatekeepers of relationships
Author	BlessedRainsAfrica
Upvotes	3
Comments	78
Date	February 16, 2019 6:48 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/ar6bh5/men_are_not_the_gatekeepers_of_relationships/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/men-are-not-the-gatekeepers-of-relationships.257174 https://theredarchive.com/post/257174

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