My mom always told me not to trust any man, be selective, basically everything in the handbook. I still did dumb shit like letting exes stay in my house I rented while working three jobs and going to school. (Barely even staying above water because they never contributed.)

My dad is old school, but was also the same. His only thing is when I was married (now divorced) he told me that I didn’t have to work because I was married and my husband had to provide. Now, my dad didn’t care if I worked, encouraged it, but we were in a place that I had to move to and I didn’t speak the language, so finding employment was near impossible. (I did try to learn the language.) It was my husbands responsibility to take care of us. Sadly, my dad ended up having to pay for my dental work because my husband wouldn’t. It was too “expensive” as he got a brand new phone.

I did a lot of dumb stuff. My friends always thought it was weird that I “dated down”. I just had such low self-esteem from being bullied and I look back now... wtf! I was hot and fit! I still am! Why did I let those trash men into my life?

I’ve been spending more time on myself because I deserve it, but when I think of my past relationships I cringe.

I don’t know why I never listened to my parents or friends. I just wanted to feel accepted and loved by a man and all I did was get taken advantage of.