Q4Women: In what ways does female sexuality fundamentally differ from male sexuality?

IamTheWalkingMenu · 2017-04-18T22:56:31+00:00

I think you've answered your own question with the quotes you've included in your post. I agree with the quotes (although I never fantasize about women) but my fantasies ALWAYS include plenty of time and attention to what he SAYS to me and of course what we are both wearing and our location (which is always somewhere interesting and exotic) so no, that sweet dick is not getting top billing.

LSTW1234 · 2017-04-18T22:49:58+00:00

One of the most fundamental differences is that male arousal tends to be triggered by any one of several cues - breasts, pussy, ass, etc. It is an "OR" gate. Female arousal tends to require input from multiple cues simultaneously - a dick alone is not enough to turn most women on, they need more context. It is an "AND" gate.

This is part of the reason why men are far more likely to have fetishes - the male process of arousal is more susceptible to getting locked into a single cue.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2017-04-18T22:54:42+00:00

Basically disembodied body parts don't do it for us. A guy can see tits or ass and get turned on regardless of what it's attached to. A disembodied penis doesn't do it for us. We need to see the full package.

Boobear3 · 2017-04-19T05:42:32+00:00

Plenty of straight women think about dicks when having sex or when masturbating. Wtf is that person talking about. Especially if our partner has a big dick ofc we are going to think about it. Maybe if their dick is small then you would focus more on their hands and their breath and shit because they have to be good at other stuff to compensate for having a tiny dick

goatismycopilot · 2017-04-18T22:38:12+00:00

What can I say, images of dancing dicks don't dominate my dreams.

Justapasserby557 · 2017-04-18T23:05:18+00:00

Maybe some other women can weigh in, but I know for me personally, I can't be sexually attracted without knowing a guy or gal. I frequently find myself appreciating nice bodies in a clinical sense, like "oh, he has nice eyes, hair, body" or "her butt is so tight, her boobs look so soft". But the only times I've thought about sexing someone came after getting to know and like their personality, quirks, etc.

For that reason, I've always struggled with loving friends, guys and gals alike. But it ended up working out with my fiance.

ClarityofDisaster · 2017-04-19T00:21:32+00:00

See, this is where my own thoughts and desires differ from what appears to be the norm.

I fantasize about dick. I have bookmarks on my phone that feature gay tumblrs or websites that focus on pics/videos of cock. I love the way dicks look, the way my boyfriend's feels, how it tastes, what it looks like flaccid or hard. I find the male member to actually be slightly sexier than the female ones, although I'm attracted to both. I'm extremely visual when it comes to sex, so the fact that I think cock is hot plays into my arousal a lot. My bf can just sit on my couch naked without an erection, and my mind will immediately go to thinking of ways to get him hard.

When I'm horny, I think about fucking my guy. Straddling him, leaning over him, his hands on my hips as I screw him hard into my mattress. Don't get me wrong, I love foreplay and oral sex, and I absolutely melt at some of the noises he makes when I tease him, but my main focus is on getting the D and how much I enjoy having it.

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mentionhelper · 2017-04-18T22:22:57+00:00

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Wallstreet3 · 2017-04-18T22:58:04+00:00

I do not buy the fact that there are any fundamental differences between male and female sexual psychologies in general.

When you get down to an individual's specifics, there can be profound differences.

But everything you will see in a male sexual psychology you will find female analogs.

Lyanina · 2017-04-19T05:21:14+00:00

There isn't much for me to add, but I agree with all the points. I don't fantasize about dicks but about a set of details forming the whole picture : his breath on my neck, the look of ecstasy in his eyes, my hands on him. A dick is not the most sexually exciting part of the experience for me so there's no fantasizing about it. I generally fantasize similarly to GinSmokeLies and GridReXX too apparently, except dominance is not always involved with men.

Turkish_Delight1 · 2017-04-20T05:49:24+00:00

You might want to hear some alternate opinion so here it is;

Those quotes don't resonate with me at all. Nice looking dicks and thick muscular thighs turns me on, no identity required. If the man looks unattractive to me, any amount of sweet or dirty words he says to me will always amount to nothing. Kind of like in the video games where you must unlock stage one ie. physical attraction to continue to stage two.

I think the reason men fantasize about women a lot while women don't is just simply because most men aren't just as visually appealing as most women. Speaking as a bisexual, women naturally have shape and curves even when they're not that fit. A naked average man is not that visually stimulating unless he workouts and build himself a figure.

Women takes care of their appearance a lot. They do their hair, put on nice perfumes, put on their "no makeup" makeup etc. Most men don't. Also the way women are so disproportionately portrayed as a sexual thing compared to men in the media is also a factor. (Not that I think it's problem :D)

lastly, for the note: no, I don't have any childhood trauma.

GridReXX · 2017-04-19T17:49:20+00:00

Yes.

Thanks for the shout out!

OneTwoWee000 · 2017-04-20T00:57:18+00:00

by the quotes you included, I think your premise is flawed:

GridReXX made another interesting comment:

And to answer your question men and women are different. When I fantasize about women I tend to think about their soft skin and boobs and yes how warm and inviting her 🐱 is. It's more of an active fantasy of me doing onto her.

When I think about men I fantasize about him fucking me. Him overpowering me. Like I know the penis is part of that equation but it's not what I think about it all. I think more about him passionately kissing my neck against the wall. I don't I think about his dick. Maybe gay men focus solely on the dick? I idk.

This is the thought of a bisexual woman.

The sexualities of bisexual and heterosexual women are not the same! Of course someone who is attracted to other woman and fantasizes about boobs/pussy is going to see penises as optional. She cannot be a stand-in for women in general; the majority of women are straight.

Where men and women largely differ is, many of us have responsive sex drives but that doesn't mean we could care less about dick. On the contrary, for heterosexual woman it's a requirement for sexual partner to have a penis and is huge turn on regardless of what sexual acts they prefer in the bedroom.

slavicgypsygirl · 2017-04-30T19:25:18+00:00

I have always been hypersexual due to many aspects of my past.

I go crazy with dates for weeks then don't want anyone near me.

I do see a psychologist.

Title	Q4Women: In what ways does female sexuality fundamentally differ from male sexuality?
Author	HopefulAboutADHD
Upvotes	4
Comments	84
Date	April 18, 2017 10:22 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/66663c/q4women_in_what_ways_does_female_sexuality/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4women-in-what-ways-does-female-sexuality.268767 https://theredarchive.com/post/268767

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