How can a man determine if a woman is in his league?

alreadyredschool · 2016-03-16T20:12:32+00:00

Approach her, if it works, then you are in her league.

BiggerDthanYou · 2016-03-16T20:10:31+00:00

At best by just asking some of the more outgoing and popular acquaintances of her. You know one of those socializers (maybe ask several of different genders and social circles) that seems to known everyone and everything that happens. Asking if you might have a chance with her is also a good way to implement the idea of having sex with you or dating you in her head. And you can also get a rough idea on how to approach her what she might be into.

It's usually pretty easy to determine someones league or the types one is attracted to if you know them and their dating history.

SpaceWhiskey · 2016-03-16T20:20:17+00:00

Just ask her out.

[deleted] · 2016-03-16T20:23:27+00:00

I think its pretty simple. Only the opposite sex can tell you what your league is. And of course, you'd need a reasonable sample size to make a sensible conclusion. Basically, your league is the maximum of what you can get with the amount of effort that is acceptable to you.

The problem with this approach is that most women are attractive to men. I personally find almost all women of my age group attractive, unless they're fat. So If we assume that most men are like that we get a situation where more attractive men might go for less attractive women for a quick lay. A cute face is nice, but it doesn't matter in bed. This in turn leads to women having their perceived value increased, while male value decreases. In other words, most men move into "would not bang" category, while most women are "would bang".

sleeping_willow_ · 2016-03-16T23:16:48+00:00

Hmm, here's an idea. Maybe you could ask a few different female friends to help you pick out a match on Tinder. The attractiveness of the girls they pick out for you will be roughly within your SMV range.

But this could backfire though if they think really highly of you. They might think 'no girl will ever be good enough for gavinok'. That sort of thing.

YaBoiTibzz · 2016-03-17T02:26:07+00:00

At 25 and under most women are out of the league of most men, so there's not much you can do. If you're unattractive as a male, it's often fatties or bust. The BP narrative of "they're out of your league" is misidentifying the issue. Yes, he is technically going for girls that are out of his league, but that doesn't mention that literally probably 8-9 of every 10 girls is out of his league. There's not much of a choice.

impossibleworlds · 2016-03-16T20:15:26+00:00

Screw leagues! Everybody should go for what they want. Totally worth the risk.

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RareBlur · 2016-03-16T20:39:16+00:00

Stop being afraid of failure... you either win or you learn.

Madness20 · 2016-03-16T23:18:23+00:00

Depends, but in general, i would say, the women that earn equal or less than you are always on your league.

[deleted] · 2016-03-17T02:22:51+00:00

It is not hard to figure out. In your late teens early 20s its all about trial and error.

All you need is an open mind from the start on who you approach. Work out which ones are receptive and which ones arent and you get the picture pretty quickly on where your smv is at.

The great thing about this is the more you approach the better you get the more you want a receptive persons response so you tend to work harder. Ie dress nicer, joke around more try new things more. So this a lot of the time raises a mans smv to be able to go after those higher smv girls.

ive seen but ugly guys who are great charmers and funny happy people take drop dead gorgeous women home.

[deleted] · 2016-03-17T13:23:11+00:00

She flirts.

[deleted] · 2016-03-17T15:03:52+00:00

There are no leagues. If a man sees a woman he is interested in, he should approach and see where it goes. If he is constantly rejected, he should probably take a closer look at his approach.

The idea of leagues is self defeating and pointless. Sure, there are some obviously beautiful people in the world, but who says they won't enjoy a relationship with someone of more average looks?

If it comes down to doing nothing and approaching "out of their league" women, I'd say men should just approach.

wattwatty · 2016-03-17T15:10:58+00:00

Almost every answer here (from bloopers anyway) seems to suggest that either the OP didn't have a well-posed question or says that league can only be determined individually and empirically (ie risk rejection a lot and keep track). Both or either of these may be true, but I swear the tone sounds a lot like, "You don't get to ask that," or, "Why don't you just get it?"

COPCO2 · 2016-03-17T15:56:03+00:00

For me, it was all through trial and error. I have a naturally flirtatious personality (so much so that I actively suppress it constantly) so I would flirt with everyone, and the ones who would be most open to it were in my league.

What's funny is that my league has changed over time, and so has my 'type.' The most traditionally-gorgeous woman I slept with was a 6-foot tall ballet dancer that my wife and I picked up on OKC. She was beautiful and while she was also fun and had a great personality to boot, she wasn't my type and I wouldn't date her one on one.

She introduced us to her flakey-BF for some group fun, and it was an odd dynamic. He was older than me and still focused on appearances. He cultivated a bad-boy image with motorcycles, auto racing, martial arts, etc., and he lived in a flashy neighborhood. He was also taller, wasn't bald, and was more traditionally attractive and me.

At first I was intimidated by him, but our differences in priorities came out pretty quickly. I have an engineering degree and focused career, he was a dental assistant working for his uncle. His motorcycle image was based on very cheap bikes, and my wife's Harley background actually intimidated him. He was no slouch in the bedroom, but I was clearly much, much better. He was a nice enough guy, but also had deep-seated commitment issues that really messed up their relationship with each other.

Overall, they were fun and to an outside observer would definitely be placed 'out of my league,' and considered to be a generally beautiful couple.

But getting to know them showed that their foundation was unstable and their relationship was fundamentally flawed. They broke up not too long after we parted ways and AFAIK are both still single.

So the concept of 'league' is a totally different thing to me now. They cultivated all the image-based stuff that makes someone cool. My wife and I have cultivated character-based stuff that gives us a good life and a great relationship.

What's interesting is that our approach to life allowed us both to 'pull' a couple of people that should have been out of our league, but clearly weren't.

So there are many ways that people are attractive, and I think TRP suggests that the image-based stuff is what's important. Cleary, I disagree.

Lonny_zone · 2016-03-18T03:12:51+00:00

If she will sleep with you AND take you for an LTR, she is in your league.

Title	How can a man determine if a woman is in his league?
Author	gavinok
Upvotes	2
Comments	58
Date	March 16, 2016 7:43 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/4apgd4/how_can_a_man_determine_if_a_woman_is_in_his/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-can-a-man-determine-if-a-woman-is-in-his.275664 https://theredarchive.com/post/275664

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