Red Pillers: To what extent do you care what women actually want or think?

ReddishBlack · 2015-02-20T17:48:28+00:00

You do make an interesting point. No one would consider the artistic soul in his skinny jeans, thick framed glasses, and lumberjack shirt to be "alpha", yet women tend to be attracted to them because of their "deep emotional connection".

WhosCountin · 2015-02-20T17:00:35+00:00

I'm not a strict RP adherent, but I definitely lean that way. I'll take you at your word and assume you do know what you want. I think that exceptions to the RP rules are a lot more common than they think. However, I think that RP strategy applies to a LOT of girls, and it doubly applies with the super hot girls who are out at a club looking to get laid. I'm interested in casual sex with as many good looking women as possible. So I think taking the RP approach makes sense from a statistics perspective. If it does work, it should allow me to bed a girl pretty quickly. If it doesn't work, it'll QUICKLY screen out the girls who aren't receptive to it so I can find one who is. When I'm looking for a relationship, I'm much more true to my natural personality because I don't want to have to put on a front at all times. Then I'm interested in girls with more of your tastes because that would be much better for me in the long term.

TL;DR: I don't think acting like you describe would get as many results - it's more rare that girls have your taste, and I bet girls with your taste, in general, wouldn't be as likely to fuck within a couple hours of meeting (though I do admit that's a kind of baseless assumption). I use this stuff in a very specific way. If it works on a girl, it works just how I want it to. If not, I can screen quickly and try another.

gregariousnefarious · 2015-02-20T21:46:18+00:00

I posted a similar sentiment about a week ago. Basically, the responses I got were that RP men are not interested in women like me (and all the women I know) because we don't like being treated like children. I think one of the most serious limitations of TRP is that it focuses on a very particular demographic of women, which seems like a bad idea if you're trying to increase the number of women who might potentially date or sleep with you. But basically, the answer seemed to go something like this: you're lying and would actually LOVE a TRP dude (demonstrably false), you're clearly a hag (also false), you don't KNOW what you want so your experiences and observations are invalid (again, false), and...umm lots of really unkind comments about cats (false! joke's on them, I'm a dog person).

But seriously, I think that women like us are far more numerous than TRP dudes would be willing to admit. There is a reason that nerds, hipsters, and otherwise un-alpha dudes do well with the ladies, and that reason is...wait for it...women have a variety of preferences!

ManRAh · 2015-02-20T18:43:38+00:00

RP and I care quite a lot about what women want or think, assuming I have any kind of rapport with them (friends, friendly acquaintances, GFs). The problem is, to be successful with women romantically, I can't let that out except in small doses.

That said, you're not a statistical aberration, you're simply confusing the meaning of "Alpha". Alpha doesn't mean some guy who's super bro-y and disgusting. It's a guy who takes charge and leads, who isn't easily manipulated, who's respected by other men (and women) because he "takes care of the pack" and ISN'T a megadouche.

TheRedRustler · 2015-02-20T20:07:07+00:00

I think the ideas of red pill and blue pill are a bit skewed.

Red pill isn't about being a huge meathead Blue pill isn't about being a nice guy

Red pill guys can be intellectual soft spoken guys, the difference is a Red Pill guy isn't going to put up with all the BS.

A blue pill guy could be a star football player who loves his girlfriend and she would NEVER cheat even though she has been banging the entire team behind his back.

Nike_NBD · 2015-02-20T17:07:54+00:00

I don't think there are literally "alphas" and "betas." I think it's a convenient shorthand but that an even more useful shorthand is using "alpha/beta" to refer to certain types of behaviors.

I'm guessing you respond better to alpha behaviors than beta behaviors. What you're saying doesn't give us adequate description when you state:

But whenever anyone has acted super alpha around me, I've only been repulsed and disgusted. I am usually much more attracted to people who intellectually engage me, and are often soft- but well-spoken.

So you think of intellectual engagement as non-"alpha"? Do you think a confident (if it is soft-spoken) declaration of some intellectual position -

"No, I think Kant's dichotomy of noumena and phenomena is an artificial split that requires certain metaphysical presuppositions that weren't adequately development in his work"

Is necessarily "non alpha"? In your view, is "alpha" behavior thereby just "caveman game" ?

_whatdreamsmaycome_ · 2015-02-20T17:01:00+00:00

To be RP you have to be comfortable with generalizations about women, that's basically a given. Most women want an Alpha, that's what they think about when they touch their clit. I don't care about what you or any other woman thinks aside from what the necessities are for me to fuck you. Almost all women want an Alpha whether they admit it or not. We've all seen women fall for douche bags, jocks, and bad boys so many times that it's impossible for women to defend themselves at this point. You can say you like XYZ all you want, we don't give a fuck because we aren't listening to what you say. We only care about what you DO and more importantly who you do.

LeGrandDiableBlanc · 2015-02-20T18:59:44+00:00

All TRP men care about what women actually want. They come to TRP to figure that out, and then to become it (or decide that it's not worth the effort).
Alpha is a contextual term, not a specific set of behaviors. For example, If you're in a group of nerdy people having an intellectual conversation, the Alpha of that group (AMOG) is the guy who is the smartest and best at that type of conversation. Alpha doesn't merely mean acting like a cave man (although in some situations it could). I would bet that you are definitely attracted to Alphas, just the type of Alpha that has similar interests to you. It's more of a James Bond stoicism and inner strength that is championed as opposed to King Kong grab-a-lady-and-drag-her-to-the-tallest-building type of domineering behavior (though a lot of basic bitches do respond really well to that sort of behavior).

Nike_NBD · 2015-02-20T19:41:36+00:00

I'll be honest, I'm a girl, and me and most my female friends are attracted to alpha men. However, looking through TRP posts, I realise this is actually a place for men to validate each other and to hate on women. There's a huge difference between dominant and domineering. Most women don't want a guy who's controlling outside of the bedroom.

YaBoiTibzz · 2015-02-20T18:09:57+00:00

But whenever anyone has acted super alpha around me, I've only been repulsed and disgusted. I am usually much more attracted to people who intellectually engage me, and are often soft- but well-spoken.

Doubt it. Odds are that in reality a guy has to meet your minimum standards of height, weight and facial aesthetics and then if he's "intellectually engaging" he might get a chance. You choose to only emphasize that last part because it paints your habits in a positive light.

Now, according to the RP the majority of women are not like me, perhaps I'm some statistical aberration. But to what extent do RP-ers care about my point of view, if at all? Are you comfortable with the generalizations of women? And are you only interested in women who would respond positively to an alpha?

A fundamental tenet of TRP is to never listen to what women say they want, and TRP also holds that women generally don't know what they want until they see it. So no, I doubt RPers care if you say you "don't want an alpha." More likely what you mean is you just don't want a certain type of alpha. A guy can still be quite alpha without being jacked and macho-aggressive.

Sansa_Culotte_ · 2015-02-21T13:11:56+00:00

According to RP the majority of women are just like you, you are just very successful at rationalizing away your deep-seated desire to be dominated by a sexually potent alpha male. AWALT.

exit_sandman · 2015-02-21T15:37:56+00:00

A. What women want? I do care. What they think? I care far less about that, because the two don't necessarily align. If there is one thing I had to find out the hard way, it is that you have to risk putting them off if you want to become interesting. Back in the bad old days, I was extremely preoccupied with what women might think of me (other people in general, but it wasn't really that detrimental with men). Today, not so much. Yeah, most women think well of "nice guys", at least as long as their feelings don't inconvenience her. They don't desire them, though, and in the end this is what counts far more than being liked. Unless you're asexual. The guys who were in demand may not have been disliked (in fact, the biggest player I know was actually universally popular), but what set them apart were that they were absolutely willing to risk being disliked.

B. Regarding your preferences....

But whenever anyone has acted super alpha around me, I've only been repulsed and disgusted. I am usually much more attracted to people who intellectually engage me, and are often soft- but well-spoken.

Which means you most probably have a very specific idea of what an alpha is; I assume an almost caricature-like image of the typical jock athlete from teenage movies or some cutthroat lawyer.

Well, let me challenge you with a friend of mine I had back in HS. He was well-spoken, very intelligent and cultivated. He was also never shy for words, very cocky and could be in a charming way rather condescending in his dealing with women (not that it hurt him). And when he had broken up with one you could bank on him having another girlfriend within the week, often enough also on the same day. Was he your typical alpha? Well, not really. But he was faaaaaaaaar from being beta. Would he be redpill? No, he was naturally good with women and I am farily confident that the grimness would really put him off. But in his dealings, he was displaying a behavior that redpillers would want to emulate.

So, if you say "I am repulsed by alphas", I take that with a grain of salt because what I am hearing is rather something like "I don't like that stereotypical aggressive alpha behavior and one-upmanship". But your statement is ultimately as meaningful as that of a woman who for example says she "doesn't like muscles" while she actually just doesn't like huge bulging roid-monsters, but is very well able to appreciate a nice physique. She feels good and less shallow when she says it, but to me it's all noise unless I see her pursuing exclusively skinny guys.

Reginleifer · 2015-02-20T17:16:19+00:00

......the majority of women are not like me

So sayeth millions of women.

To what extent do you care what women actually want or think?

I would wager that RP men care a lot of what women actually wants, and care very little for what they think they want. One of the conditions that can help you get laid is offering women what they want, this plays into a lot of RP ideas on how one should behave, how one should speak, what one should do to assert masculinity and advertise his desirability.

This does not equal an interest in caring what they think they want, because as I said before..... people SAY they want one thing but oftentimes mean another. People in sales are pretty keen on this.

to what extent do RP-ers care about my point of view, if at all?

Assuming you are not lying and do indeed fall neatly into the category of "special snowflake" then I imagine that RP men looking for casual sex don't really care what you think because their technique works on such a huge portion of the female population your rejection isn't going to matter in the grand scheme of sluttery.

Cyralea · 2015-02-20T17:30:47+00:00

But whenever anyone has acted super alpha around me, I've only been repulsed and disgusted

It would help if you defined what you believe 'Alpha' behaviour is.

I am usually much more attracted to people who intellectually engage me, and are often soft- but well-spoken.

What we often mean by 'Women don't know what they want' is that they usually take a good number of qualities for granted, and focus on the subjective specifics to state their attraction triggers. I could be wrong, but I'd wager you'd want a man that was physically attractive, confident, or high status/wealth before considering your stated point. I sincerely doubt you'd be romantically involved with a man who lacked all three qualities but was intellectually-stimulating. He'd be a friend to you.

Title	Red Pillers: To what extent do you care what women actually want or think?
Author	Nike_NBD
Upvotes	2
Comments	52
Date	February 20, 2015 4:45 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/2wk8rc/red_pillers_to_what_extent_do_you_care_what_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/red-pillers-to-what-extent-do-you-care-what-women.283387 https://theredarchive.com/post/283387

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