What do you think of Chateau Heartiste's "thermonuclear option"?

BlowingBlueSmoke · 2014-02-14T15:05:37+00:00

Never in a million years would I tolerate that kind of behavior from someone who supposedly "loved" me. I'd rather be single than deal with someone that vile, immature, abusive, and manipulative. I'd immediately cut contact and never speak to that piece of shit again. So no, terrible advice for anyone who wants a mature, respectful relationship. If you want nonstop drama, misery and game playing, do exactly as described above.

[deleted] · 2014-02-14T15:41:29+00:00

This isn't even manipulation, it's just outright abusive, and cheating is a dick move in any situation let alone if this is the intention. Fuck that.

[deleted] · 2014-02-14T16:34:51+00:00

This would be a lot more effective if I didn't have a loving mother. During those two weeks I would be at my mom's house crying until I threw up and there's no way she would let me go back to him after that. But for the sake of argument, let's pretend that I didn't have my mom to take care of me. I have a pathological fear of abandonment. Dread game usually works on me, to a certain extent. I would probably go back to him.

So let's say I go back. Well what you now have is not a love slave. Instead, you have a miserable anxiety ridden train wreck of a girlfriend. I won't get over the cheating and I will bring up how hurt and sad I am and you'll get sick of it. And I'll know that you're sick of it, so I'll try to stop but it will only make things worse. For example: if you go out without me, I will bring up my trust issues and ask you not to go. I will text you incessantly all night and make you aware that I am a nervous wreck. And I know that me texting you incessantly is only pushing you further away, which makes me more of a nervous wreck, which means that I will have to text you again to apologize for being such a horrible girlfriend. Then I'll get mad at myself for texting you again. By the time you get home you'll have to deal with a sobbing whirlwind of emotion.

You will get so fucking sick of me. This is not worth it. You should have just broken up with me and you've made a terrible mistake.

Edit: And I think anyone who this scheme would work on would have to have some of the same mental issues I have, so even if she ends of going back to him it will probably end badly anyway.

polyhooly · 2014-02-14T18:32:23+00:00

So does this guy just sit around and brainstorm shitty things you can do to someone in a relationship, and idiots lap in up because of this novelty of "women want the exact opposite of what they say/society teaches you?" Go ahead, follow any of that advice. Ignore your girl's calls, hit on her friends, cheat on her. I look forward to your "How following The Red Pill's advice ruined my life" posts on TBP.

I mean really, how dumb do you have to be to buy into this shit? You've been had if you do.

am_thro_way · 2014-02-14T15:12:16+00:00

Regardless of whether it would actually work, one has to wonder whether a relationship where you have to resort to such drastic measures is actually worth salvaging in the first place.

LifterofThings · 2014-02-14T15:40:09+00:00

Mmm, yeah. I'd be out the door so fast it'd make his head spin.

... that being said, there is possibly an under-emphasis on "calibration" on a lot of CH's articles. Maybe there are some women out there for whom this would work. I cannot imagine why you'd ever want to LTR one of these women, though.

[deleted] · 2014-02-14T21:15:50+00:00

Infidelity doesn't always break a relationship. Some people don't think they are worth better. They'll learn to live with it regardless of how he behaves. Some people decide to work through it and he has to make a huge effort to regain her trust. Some people just pack their bag, leave and never look back.

That text reeks of megalomania. There is no man on this planet who can make all women follow his command. Unfortunately, there are some men who target women with weak self esteem and try to exploit them for egotistical purposes. I think that if you consciously cheat to hurt the other person or if you advocate that other people do this you have some serious psychological problems and should get professional help.

[deleted] · 2014-02-14T18:53:29+00:00

That would backfire so hard. Most people would be out that door in a heartbeat and fuck you.

Course I know sad sacks stuck in a codependent abusive relationship. So yeah land one of those sad sacks!

still_very_alive · 2014-02-14T14:59:19+00:00

Seems like it could easily backfire. Also not something I'll do or recommend - I draw the line at actual cheating.

fiat_lux_ · 2014-02-14T15:57:09+00:00

I rarely take any "thermonuclear option" seriously, and I see here that this is no exception.

SpaceWhiskey · 2014-02-14T21:36:22+00:00

This wouldn't work on me. Especially since I know enough about PUA stuff that seeing in the wild is an immediate red flag and turn-off. I'd be upset, sure, but I would never go back to someone who cheated on me for the sole purpose of trying to manipulate my behavior and basically mind-fuck me. I mean, cheating is bad enough. But the things this scenario says about the kind of guy who would do it...

For one, it tells me that he's viewing the other woman as a means to an end. Not because he feels something for her, something worth risking his current relationship over, but because she's essentially a prop in this convoluted plan. So that's shitty. I also don't see how he could claim to have feelings for the person he's doing this to, it sounds like a manipulation fantasy just for the sake of doing it, which is messed up. Also, the kind of person it would work on likely has self-esteem issues and/or a lack of supportive friends/family around. He'd be taking advantage of that, which is awful.

The writer of the article has likely never actually done this "thermonuclear option" to a relationship, but it saddens me to know that at least one person out there might try it.

goatismycopilot · 2014-02-14T22:50:21+00:00

Sounds like an excellent tactic if you want to end the relationship, this would make me run fast in the other direction.

ElderSign · 2014-02-15T00:07:34+00:00

I just imagined this happening in my relationship...

...thanks for the chuckle. Yeah, no.

myfriendscantknow · 2014-02-14T14:55:12+00:00

Oh my! This will end my relationship, I'm sure of it. Mr. Zoot and I have agreed that two things will break us: infidelity or abuse. This is a great example of both. The scenario is actually ridiculous, like an afternoon soap or drama from the 80s or something, Blake Carrington arranging for Krystal to find out about Alexis and then the two throw wine in each other's face and drag each other into the pool. What normal person does this? I've never been cheated on so I have no idea how it would feel. I'd imagine it'd hurt me deeply but I think my reaction would be to grit my teeth pack my things get out now cry later. The thing is, there are women with options, and I don't think this guy Heartists can date them, or want to date them.

W-Z-R · 2014-02-17T12:31:18+00:00

Redpill and no

tbh I don't think I could ever love a woman who would put up with that, really I do want an LTR to be strong, like a sparring partner rather than a slave

[deleted] · 2014-02-14T14:53:27+00:00

I don't have this much free time.

suscitare · 2014-02-19T05:22:53+00:00

I think it would work.

sh1v · 2014-02-21T14:52:10+00:00

About the same thing I think about actual thermonuclear options. Something only to be used when all other methods have failed and the other person's bombs are a few km from your soil.

GridReXX · 2014-02-24T22:40:24+00:00

I imagine that would possibly work on anyone who doesn't think they could do better. Male or female really.

lbspredh · 2014-02-14T14:26:13+00:00

theres probably something in that, especially if you buy into the whole dark triad thing that's as far as you can go without ending up in prison

acadametw · 2014-02-14T16:10:38+00:00

Is it good advice? Any type of general advice not tailored to a specific situation and people is crap. Even more so when it's quite extreme. Is it moral? By who's standards? Unanswerable.

But I can tell you my experiences with this "option". I quote option because for me it's really not. I can't be mono amorous and I don't want to be. I always make it clear from the start to my partners regardless of the relationship being a one night stand or long term prospect. If they want something more that sex with me the reaction is always the same and in terms of what you're reading in the other comments here. "I would never", "I could never', etc. But they never end things before they start. As far as I can tell without being able to read their mind they think something like "he never met that special one, if he did he wouldn't seek anything else" but they don't say it. Fast forward a few months - the enthusiasm of new partners wears off - and at this point I go with "it's easier to ask forgiveness than to ask for permission". Sort of, to be honest I don't ask for forgiveness either cause I really don't think I'm doing anything wrong. So I have sex with another woman, go back to my SO, continue to have a good time with her and after a couple of days I ask her if she enjoys the relationship. When answered yes I ask if the fact that I had sex with somebody else a few days back changes anything. Unfortunately haven't found anyone yet who would answer no. Anyway, a few cries, a few arguments, but never has anyone left me at this stage, nor later when I repeat the "offense". Some start acting so toxic in the relationship that I have to end it though cause they obviously can't handle it. But in all those cases it would have ended sooner rather than later anyway. I don't like egotistic and jealous people that can't stand others have fun without them.

Moral of the story? There is none, everybody and every situation is different. I surely ain't here to try to promote polyamory, open relationships or anything like that. A few lessons to be learned though. Don't say what you would do in a situation you haven't been in yet. It's internet bravado. And try to keep an open mind, don't limit yourself with what you could do or would accept from somebody. I hate cheating but strictly from what's been worded in the OP quote I see none of that going on, there is no intention to hide anything or deceit.

Title	What do you think of Chateau Heartiste's "thermonuclear option"?
Author	myfriendscantknow
Upvotes	1
Comments	50
Date	February 14, 2014 2:17 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1xwbby/what_do_you_think_of_chateau_heartistes/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-do-you-think-of-chateau-heartistes.286210 https://theredarchive.com/post/286210

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