I married on 4/20/13 (420 ayeeee) and it was a huge mistake.
Fast forward to November 2014. I flew home from South Korea on a moments notice to save my marriage. It did not work, she was done and had already cheated multiple times. My dumbass forgave her for this. The months leading up to this took a toll on my brain. I was so exhausted from dealing with my wife (she was in California while I was in South Korea) that once November came my brain knew nothing but calmness. It was tired and I was done. I will fast forward to the night I finally decided to end it.
We're laying in bed. No talking, no sex, no nothing. I thought to myself "Wtf is this?" and I got up and started getting dressed. This is the moment I feel like the natural Red Pill kicked in.
"Where are you going?"
"Im done. This is stupid. Its a waste of life."
"Youre just overreacting."
"I am not. I will come for my stuff tomorrow and this marriage is done."
The next day I showed up to get my things. There are only 3 things I wanted. My 51 inch TV, my surround sound system for my room, and my car. These 3 things were super important to me because its the 3 things I most cared about prior to getting married lol (got married at 21, I was blue pill betaboi). I knew I was about to live alone and I did not want to go out and get a new TV and a new surround sound and I definitely was not going to give her the car I had gotten at 19. That was my baby.
So I get out of my car and I say "I am here for my TV and the surround sound. Anything else you can keep I dont care."
"Yeah sorry but no. I mean youre already taking the car so I am going to keep these things."
Lol. All I could think of was "I pay for your phone bill. Prior to today I was your main source of income. Now I want 2 things and I cannot have them because Im already taking the car? That I had prior to marriage? I cant have MY stuff?" Some women have no shame. I was so over this stupid marriage that I said "fuck it." and I left. I just wanted out, no drama.
I flew back to South Korea and did not pursue the divorce until March, when I returned. From November 2014 to March 2015 she:
- Called to ask me about my taxes. She wanted money. I refused and told her I filed for taxes alone.
- Tried to kill herself. Luckily we had insurance and that paid for the bills.
- Got pregnant by some other dude.
Now here comes the fun part. I knew who the guy was. It was one of her ex-bfs lol. His mother was super close to my ex wife because my ex wife took her to her cancer treatments even after he had broken up with her. My ex wife had moved into her "mothers" house around December and around that time her ex bf lost his job and moved back in with mommy. Once they were living together they fucked and she got preggo.
I returned from South Korea in March and my second day back I met up with the "mother". She loved me! When my ex wife introduced me she took me in as her "son" and she adored me. She was super cool and I decided to meet up with her to ask about her son and my wifes kid. (She had also called me back in December to tell me my wife had moved in and that it was nothing personal against me. She just needed to help my ex wife like my ex wife helped her with cancer. I took it with no hard feelings. She was just an innocent woman trying to help.)
"Are they going to take responsibility for their child? Or will she say its mine because were not divorced yet and expect me to pay for this?"
A few moments of silence..."My son is scared. He already lost his first girl to his other baby momma (lmfao) and now he's scared that you will claim this kid and he will loose it too."
I thought to myself. "I want my tv, my fucking surround sound system, and my car. If I dont get these things I am going to be a fucking wonderful single dad." I look a her in the eye and say. "I only want a few things. My tv, my surround sound, my car, and for her to sign the divorce papers with no questions."
She looked at me like if she had just seen Jesus. "That is all you want?"
"Yes. If I get that I dont care about her child, I dont care about your son, and they can live happily ever after. I told her back in November that I just wanted my stuff."
"Wait.....she knows this?"
Her eyes filled with rage. I am assuming that her son and her were worried that I would want the baby lol. And I am assuming that my ex wife had not told them what I wanted because my ex wife was still trying to milk me for my money. She looks at me and says "Tomorrow I will call you, I will tell you were to meet me and I will have your stuff for you."
I raised one eyebrow (jk I didnt because I cant but If I could I would have). I said "Mmmm. Well if you say so." A part of me did not believe her because my ex wife is a bitch.
She left soon after that and I went to visit my Father in Law (He knew I was divorcing his daughter. I had a talk with him and shit and he ended up crying and told me that if I needed to divorce her, to do it. He knew she was a fuck up too lol). I had not visited him and he was a nice guy so I just wanted to say hi. As I was talking to him my phone vibrated and I got a text from "mother"
"Can you come right now?"
What the actual fuck. She had said tomorrow lol. I call her and ask "Whats wrong?"
"I got home. Asked your wife about your stuff. I said I was going to take them to you tomorrow and my son jumped in to defend her. Now hes against me. Yelling at me, telling me that why am I taking your side after just one talk with you. I told him that your wife is a bitch and shes been trying to get money from you and now he wants to talk to you". I reply "I will be there in 20." I say bye to my wifes dad and head over to the shitstorm.
Here's were the fun part begins.
I show up to the house and I knock. The door opens, its the son, he steps outside and says
"Lets talk bro."
"Sure thing man whats up?"
"So wtf is going on man, how did this all happen?"
"Well. She cheated so now I am done. Thats basically it."
"She cheated on you with these 2 girls right?"
"Uhhhh no bro. With this dude." For story purposes lets call him Jay.
"With a dude?!"
In my head "This is about to get fucking good." I begin to elaborate, "Yeah man, she cheated on me with this dude. She also talks to another one of her ex bf's now (different story) so that baby might not even be yours."
He cuts me off "Lets go inside." he says as he leads us inside.
I walk in side and I see his mother, his mothers roommate (lady was renting a room there) and my wife. Keep in mind, I have not seen my wife since November when she denied me my stuff. It has now been 4 months since I last saw her in person and it was a pretty strange feeling. I saw her there sitting on the couch, nice and quiet.
"Mom" the son looks to his mom "How long was I out there? 2 minutes? less?"
He then looks at my wife and asks "I told you if he came here and told me some shit about you I didnt know about I was going to help him take whatever the fuck he wants from this house. Remember?"
"Who the fuck is Jay?"
This caught her off guard. She didnt expert to hear the guys name and she did not respond and that alone was enough to confirm to him that it was true. "What the fuck! I thought you had told me everything? I told you everything about me and my baby momma and all the drama I had in my life and you said you told me everything. Wtf is this!? Why does he show up here and within 2 minutes hes already winning."
I decided to add more fuel to the fire "She only cares about herself bro."
"I can see that! Well since it doesnt fucking matter anymore, I'll tell you who else she cheated on you with. With me."
I just stare.
"Before she went to Korea to see you I hung out with her. She told me she wanted to be with me and I let her know that she was married and that she should go home and talk to you instead. Maybe she just missed you. She responded and told me that she didnt miss you and that she had already made up her mind that she wanted to be with me. That it would NEVER work with you."
Strange as it sounds, I did believe him. The dude is not some monster. He might be a fuck up, but not a monster. What he said should have hurt me because my wife had gone to Korea for 3 months to see me, during that time she said she loved me and blah blah. So this ho had the nerve to say this to this guy and then go visit me and tell me she loved me. Hoes will be hoes.
"Youre a real piece if shit." I said to my wife. It was the only thing I said that night. I saw her eyes light up and I could see she was about to fire back with some bullshit but he cut her off "No! He can call you whatever the fuck he wants." He then looks at me "Did she try to get money from you?"
"Yeah, tried to get some of my tax money."
Wife chimes in "No I didnt, I called to tell you to take me off your taxes."
I started laughing so hard I swore all 4 of them were going to turn on me for being rude. "No lol, you called and got mad because I rejected you."
Mothers roommate chimes in "Its true. You were mad steaming that day in the car because he said no. I was with you."
She had nowhere to run. A defenseless animal cornered by the very same people she loved. The mother got up and went to open her room and the door was locked. "Give me the key to the room." she said.
"No." My wife responded.
"Give me the fucking key."
"GIVE ME THE FUCKING KEY BEFORE I BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU!" as she yelled this she walked over to her and was about to bust her shit but the son jumped in and got in between. "You know what! This is my fucking house." and she slammed the door open. Hinges flying everywhere. "Get your stuff." she says to me.
I go in there and start getting my shit. As I am walking my shit out I can hear the guy yelling at my wife "YOU TOLD ME YOU FUCKING DID EVERYTHING FOR HIM. YOU FUCKING TREATED HIM LIKE A KING AND WENT ABOVE AND BEYOND FOR HIM. FUCK THAT, YOU GAVE THIS MAN HELL! I DONT KNOW HOW THE FUCK HE PUT UP WITH YOU!" and he just kept going.
I finally had all my shit out and the mom and son come out to talk to me. The guy says "I feel like telling her to leave." he was mad.
As were talking my wife finally comes out and starts saying "You think youre so innocent huh?"
"Get back in the house" says the mother.
"He thinks he so innocent, like hes done nothing wrong. You met with your ex last week they already told me.:"
This is true, I did. Shes an ex from years ago and now were just good friends. We met up to talk about our failed relationships lmao did not smash. I look at my wife and say "Okay...and?"
Mother chimes in "Get in the house." with a more serious tone.
Wife begins to spew more diarrhea and the mother raises her voice one more time "Get in the FUCKING house!"
My wife goes back in the fucking house lol
The son goes after her and 2 minutes later comes outside apologizing to the mom for the new hole in the wall. He goes back in and clothes start flying out the front door. "I told you if you decide to leave this house youre never fucking coming back."
The mom looks at me. "You got your stuff. You can go. I have to deal with this." I give her a hug and say bye.
Fast forward a few months my wife agrees to everything! I kept all my shit even the furniture and all sorts of crap. She never fought me in court because everyone in her life would have been againts her if she did because they all loved me. And that is the greatest revenge I could have ever asked for.
I think sometimes. What if I had shown up to the house, got in a fight with the dude and all that, this outcome would have sucked. I remained calm because I just didnt give a shit anymore and ever since that marriage I have never let anyone walk over me like that. Put yourself first! Do not let ANYONE dictate your life and always remember to remain calm, because when you are calm you make the wisest decisions.
Also dont get married lolz.
EDIT: Adding something here for feel good purposes. At the end before her mother told me to go, she told me that prior to me getting there the tension in the room was massive! The 20 minutes it took me to get there felt like years to her. She said you could hear an Ant walking. Every now and then my wife would say "Im leaving. I know what hes going to say when he gets here and I cannot believe you guys are going to just let him come here and talk his shit. This is stupid. I am leaving." The mother didnt let her though. She told her to sit her fucking ass down and wait. She told her "If you know what hes going to say, you have nothing to worry about than" but my ex wife knew that the shit was about to hit the fan, and she was right.