Hello FDS ladies,
I'm here to share with you all an experience of mine so others can learn as well. Back in 2017, I met a guy on Tinder. He seemed respectful so I decided to meet him in a public place. Everything seemed perfect. We started dating and I told him about some of the challenges I had with my family. Two years pass and we haven't went on an actual vacation. He said either 1.) He isn't "the vacationing type" 2.) We can't go on vacation bc of my parents.
Please keep in mind that we were both 23 years old, not 17. As a forward thinker, I always knew that 2 years into a relationship was an important milestone. I noticed that our relationship wasn't progressing. His dude seemed to put more effort into his actuarial career than into our relationship. When we were surrounded by his male friends, I decided to publicly ask him about going on vacation. In that moment, his friends seemed excited and appeared to encourage him to go for it. Unfortunately, he had an annoyed expression and said "We'll see." His friends looked shocked!
A month later, I broke up with him. I never wanted to but his behavior reminded me of a stubborn child who was being pressured to clean his room. At this point, my logical mind was telling me that something didn't seem right... he didn't seem to want to go out of his way for me... he didn't seem to be in love with me. I was taught that when a man truly loves you and respects the people around him, he wouldn't shy away from being generous or move ahead with plans.
Four months post breakup, he met some actuarial friends online and went on a weekend trip to Boston, MA. My ex only knew this one guy for about a month before deciding to go on vacation. My heart sunk when my bff told me.
Lesson for my fellow ladies: A man puts as much effort into his relationship as he does for his career and hobbies. A boy will treat his relationship with reluctance like a chore. His career and advanced education level doesn't mean that he will treat you the way that you deserve.
Thank you.
Update: When I was with his parents, his father seemed very generous and open for us to go on trips in their home state. The look on my ex's face didn't seem enthusiastic.
Update #2: A male read this post and sent me an invite into a chat group by congratulating me for being "a cum dumpster." Ladies, please be aware that all sorts of characters read these posts.
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