Here is a real life example in my own family circle.

My older sister is in her early 40s and she’s very well educated, accomplished, has a well paying job and hobbies. She’s stunning (think Monica Bellucci’s twin) and has a heart of gold. She was married at 26 and her (now husband) did everything he could to have a chance with her. He got a house, raised his education levels and checked all her boxes as a great potential partner. Once they were married with kids involved, he completely “changed”….of course he didn’t really “change” but went back to his LV ways. He knows she will never leave him (cultural reasons) and gave up his high value performance. He doesn’t help with the kids, do any chores around the house, and watches sports when she’s picking up after everyone.

My sister in law on the other hand, married around the same time and is thriving. Her husband takes her out on dates all the time, pays for everything and contributes in the house. They have two children and he actively participates in their lives. He helps out with the cooking and picks up after himself and the kids. He buys her a brand new vehicle every 5 years for peace of mind that his family is driving safe. They’re always glowing and happy whenever they talk about one another. They have been married for 15 years.

My point of this post is to emphasize how important it is to vet your partners! That LV/NV men don’t suddenly become HV overnight, and to be aware of it. In the first example, he put up a front and it wasn’t truly him. Being a stunning woman inside and out doesn’t guarantee attracting a HV partner. Being flooded with materialistic gifts doesn’t make a man high value either. HV men are always thinking about their partners and family first. They exhibit high values of empathy and contribute to the relationship. This is their default. LVM want security and will put on a performance if that’s what they need to get it.