So background, my wife and I have been together for 5 years. We have 2 kids (one together and another from her previous relationship) we’ve been married 3 years and have had pretty normal marriage. We fought occasionally over normal married things, mostly due to stress about other factors. I work in the oil field and am gone for long periods of time but it was something we discussed as a couple before I started and agreed financially it was a good decision. We always communicated well while I was away and have had a ton of trust between each other.

Now enter the last month or so, my wife approached me about adopting a family for Christmas since we’ve had a good year. To which I agreed, thinking it would be gifts and that would be it. However it has turned into my wife and the single father becoming friends. Which I was okay with, of course with the stipulation when I went back to work just before Christmas. Which in the beginning it did, but eventually it has turned into my wife ignoring me whenever they are together. I voiced my concerns to her and was met with ‘I am over reacting and they are just friends’ . Being a trusting husband I listened and chocked it up to stress and isolation at work and kept an open mind about there relationship.

Now, I have never been a big social media guy and haven’t had a Facebook in years. But with my unusual amount of alone time I consulted my wife about reactivating my account as another source of entertainment, to which she agreed. After reactivating said account I decided to take a look at said fathers profile to see what he looked like and his kids since I have yet to meet him in person. To I was greeted a meme about sleeping with a man with a woman in exchange for Christmas gifts for the children. Accompanied by comment from my wife seemly flirting and alluding to the fact that, that is what there relationship was based on. Along with comment from there mutual friends saying how funny and now they get what there exchange was about.

I’m sitting here alone and heart broken struggling with the fact of do I confront her now or in person when I get home. As well risk being wrong about the nature of the conversation and pushing my wife away further. Now if she cheated I’m gone but if I’m wrong she will most likely leave anyway. So I am stuck not wanting to lose her and not wanting to be taken advantage of.